Page 25 of Bride Takes a Laird (Highland Vows & Vengeance #2)
D ays, then a fortnight, then more days passed, and still Kendra had not heard a word from Magnus. She sent him another missive asking him to come. Deep winter was fast approaching and she’d prayed that he had received the missives she’d sent him but John told her the men he’d sent had yet to return.
Kendra leaned on her bed chamber window ledge and gazed at the landscape of white. Snow covered everything and was deep enough to obscure the track marks made by the carts on the lane. There was no way she could travel in such weather and with her now heavy burden, she was confined to her bedchamber. Linet thought she’d fall down the steps of the manor for she wobbled when she walked. Not only was she hampered from travel, Magnus too must have been hindered. She expected he would await until the snow melted to come to her and that could take until spring. Though she despaired because she wasn’t sure if it was due to the weather or his anger that kept him from her.
Her midsection stuck out and she gentled her hands over the material of her overdress pressing the swell of her waist. “Lord, I pray my sweet baby that you are not large but from the sight of my belly, you must be. You’re going to be difficult to bring into this world.” She chuckled lightly at her speech. The babe was growing steadily and encumbering her as each day passed .
A knock jarred her from her thoughts and she hastily sat in a nearby chair. Otherwise, she’d likely receive another lecture from Linet about leaving her bed. Linet opened the door and used her hip to close it behind her.
“Good day, Kendra. I brought you a light midday meal. Mama says you should eat something because you barely touched your morning meal.” She set a tray on a nearby table and sat on the bedside, facing her. “Are you well?”
“I am. In fact, I feel wonderful. If you insist that I do nothing then let me come down to the hall. I can do nothing from there. But there is much to see to before the baby comes and I must handle it before I’m unable. I will let you and John and your mother fuss over me and see to the tasks.”
Linet laughed. “Since I doubt that I shall be able to keep you from leaving your bedchamber, then very well. But at least let me guide you to the hall so you don’t fall.”
“I want to meet with the hawkers this day. Will you ask John to tell them to come?”
“The hawkers?”
She nodded. “I thought to return the coins to Magnus, the ones he paid to Heatherington, but I deem he won’t accept them and so I decided to refurnish the manor and put it to right. I sold a good many things when I was trying to find a cure for Papa. Now I can restore my home to its former grandeur.”
“I cannot believe your husband hasn’t come. I thought he would. Winston is plagued with worry over it. He deems something might have happened to Laird Cameron. He said that he might travel home when the snow melts to find out.” Linet pressed her hands over the wrinkles of her dress and averted her gaze.
“All you need to do is take a gander at the snow to know what has kept him. I haven’t seen such a harsh winter in many a season. I am sure it is only the weather that impedes him. ”
Linet raised her eyes and fixed a smile on her face. “If that is what you believe, I hope that is so. I shall tell John at the soonest to have the hawkers come. Mama says the midwife should be here soon for your lookover.”
“Good. I’ll eat my midday meal here. Return for me and I’ll settle in the hall and await Mistress Agnes and the hawkers.” Kendra pulled the tray to her and took a chunk of sweetened bread.
“As long as you promise not to take the stairs.”
She nodded and set her hand on her heart to assure Linet of her vow.
Linet left her and Kendra spooned in the thick pottage. It was a delicious rabbit stew that was hearty with a thick broth, carrots, and leeks. She ate the entire bowl, set the tray aside, and broke the bread into small pieces. As she ate the bread, Kendra thought over her conversation with Linet and that she too worried why Magnus hadn’t come. She told herself that it was because of the snow but realistically, she was unsure if such a thing would keep him from coming to her. Did he not care? With that thought, she wrote another missive, the third she would send to him.
Magnus, I know not what keeps you from me but I hope you are well. Our child grows rapidly within my body and soon I shall deliver him or her. I want to assure you that I am well and hope that you come before he or she arrives. I thought that I wouldst receive a response to my prior missives but alas, you must be too busy to write me. My heart grows weary at waiting for you to come. Yours always, Kendra
She sniffled a tear back as her heart tensed at rereading the words she had written. Why hadn’t he responded? If he received her missives, he would have. Perhaps he hadn’t received them. The men she’d sent hadn’t returned but she thought they might’ve been delayed because of the snow. That made sense, and so she used the back of her hand to swipe away her tears .
Kendra opened the door of her bedchamber and called for Linet. She awaited her at the top of the steps. Though she was capable of taking the steps, she had promised Linet to await her.
“Let me take hold of you,” Linet said and wrapped her arm around her back and held onto her hand. “Take it easy now.”
Since Kendra had become confined to the manor and her bedchamber, she appreciated Linet’s endearing friendship more than ever. And she was a great help especially now, when it seemed as if half the day passed before she reached the bottom of the stairs. Finally, Kendra waddled across the floorboards and when she reached the table, she was practically breathless. Before she could ask whether John had relayed her messages to the hawkers, he strode inside.
John bowed to her. “My Lady, you look well. The hawkers said they would come later, after they close their carts and cottages. There’s nary a person outside this day for there’s an icy wind. They’ll probably close early.”
“Linet, will you have your father come? As the steward, he should be made aware of what coins I want to use. I also wish to make a list of what I want to purchase with the coins.” She reached for the pitcher of water that sat on the table and poured herself a cup. Linet left but returned with Mistress Agnes.
“My Lady, you are glowing and appear to be quite the image of health. I shall look you over and should gain a sense of how long you have.”
“How long do I have? I feel as though the baby will be here soon.”
The midwife nodded. “Yes, but be warned, babies come when they are ready, not when you are. You are as big as a… Well, that is to say, you must be further along than I thought.”
All left the hall except for the midwife. Agnes inspected almost every speck of her body and made tsking sounds but said nothing as she went about her task. Kendra immensely disliked having the woman touch her but she had no choice in the matter. When Agnes finished with her inspection, she washed her hands in the basin by the buttery and returned to her.
“You will probably have the baby soon, My Lady. Have you felt any pains?”
“Nay, none at all. Is the baby too large? Do you deem that I shall have trouble delivering him? I fear that I might.” Kendra had tried not to think of the coming event but it was always the second of the last thought of the night before she closed her eyes. The last was always that of Magnus and she prayed that he was well. She ruminated over his absence and her inability to share with him the joy at the forthcoming birth of their child.
Agnes shook her head. “Of course not, My Lady. God willing the baby slips from you and you have an easy time of it. We shall see. Now, Linet tells me that you won’t stay in bed so I’m telling you to stay off your feet and let others tend to you. Once the baby comes, you will be tired and will relish the opportunity to rest.”
“I promise that I shall. Thank you, Mistress Agnes. I will call for you when it is time.”
After the midwife left, Kendra pressed herself upward and rose from her seat. She crossed the hall to the table where she kept parchments and ink. When she retrieved the items she needed, she returned to the table, sat, and set out to make a list of the items she wanted to replace. First thing in order was trying to regain the massive hall’s table she’d sold. Hopefully, no one had purchased it from the hawker. Her father would be happy to know their home would be returned to its former prestige.
And that got her to thinking about Aston. Her brother still had not returned from war. She’d received no writs telling her of his death but that didn’t mean he hadn’t succumbed to war. Often family remained unknowing if their sons or husbands were killed in battle. She prayed that he would return and when he did, he would find his home as grand as it had once been .
Kendra couldn’t concentrate on the list and rose. She pressed her hand on the lower part of her back and ambled to the window casement to open the shutter. A brisk breeze blew at her face and whipped at her hair. The cold air felt marvelous on her face. She drew in the scent of the wintery, earthy dampness. As she gazed through the casement, she wondered what Magnus was doing at that moment and if he thought about her.
Probably not.
She grimaced to herself and realized that she had a difficult decision to make. If the clan mattered more to Magnus, she had to set him free. The last thing she wanted was to be last in the heart of her husband. If he ever showed up, she would have to tell him that he was free to rule his clan as he wanted but without her. His selfish attitude saddened her, but she had survived alone most of her life and she could well do so for the remainder of it.
Eventually, she’d forget about him. She’d be miserable but only perhaps for a short time. Her love for Magnus and his happiness overrode her own. She would go on and raise their child without him. Kendra vowed to love her baby with enough adoration of two parents. Though their marriage was contractual, she realized that she wanted and needed more from Magnus.
She needed him to care for her and to put her first in his heart. Kendra wanted him to love her, love her with all his heart, as much as she loved him with hers.