Page 42 of Break My Heart (The Haydon Falls #2)

Gina

‘You look beautiful,’ I tell Callie as I give her a hug.

She’s in her wedding dress, about to get married.

We’re waiting in the barn for the horse-drawn carriage that will be taking us down to where the ceremony is being held.

It’s just past the orchard by a little pond surrounded by trees that still have their fall color.

Brody used his lawn equipment to clear out an area for chairs to be set up for guests.

In front of the chairs is a large white gazebo that Nash and his dad built last summer.

It’s where Nash and Callie will say their vows today.

After the ceremony, we’ll come back to the barn for the reception.

I helped Lyndsay and Martha decorate it earlier this week.

I’d planned to spend the week dealing with G’s but decided I needed to do what Sawyer suggested and take some time to relax and get my head straight before making any big decisions.

Nash fixed the broken door at G’s so I could lock it and Sawyer boarded up the windows.

That should keep the place from getting even more damaged from weather, vandals, or whatever critters are around there.

At least my beer fermentors weren’t damaged.

They’re worth more than anything else in the building.

‘Are you sure I don’t look fat?’ Callie asks, running her hand over her belly. She’s showing, but it’s just a small bump and her dress covers it. It’s fitted at the chest, then is loose and flowing all the way to the bottom.

‘You look gorgeous,’ Lyndsay says, adjusting Callie’s veil. ‘If I didn’t know it, I’d never guess you were pregnant.’

‘I just want to make it through the ceremony without throwing up,’ Callie says.

‘You’ll be fine,’ Jen says. ‘You haven’t thrown up in days.’

‘Are you nervous?’ Kira asks. She’s Austin’s girlfriend. I met her for the first time today. She’s in college so she’s always studying or at class when Austin comes up here with his brothers.

‘Not at all,’ Callie says. ‘I feel like I’m already married to Nash. We just need to make it official.’

‘You two are so cute together,’ Ivy says. ‘Always holding hands, kissing.’

‘You and Jake are the same way,’ Callie says.

‘Sometimes, not always. We fight more than you guys do.’ She smiles. ‘But I kind of like it. It gets me all fired up, which leads to me getting turned on.’

I laugh. ‘Sounds like Sawyer and me when we’re competing against each other.’

Everyone looks at me.

‘You guys are back together?’ Lyndsay asks.

‘Oh, um, no. I meant when we were dating.’

‘Do you think you guys will get back together?’ Ivy asks.

‘Maybe,’ I mutter.

‘Wait.’ Lyndsay races up to me. ‘Did you say maybe?’

‘I’m thinking about it. ’

‘What’s there to think about? You guys are perfect for each other and Sawyer loves you. We all do.’

‘Sawyer doesn’t love me.’

All the girls roll their eyes.

‘What? What’s that for?’

‘For you not admitting he loves you,’ Callie says. ‘It’s so obvious. We can all see it, and we know you love him too. So stop waiting and just get back together with him.’

‘I want to, but I still don’t know if I’m staying here. I don’t know if opening G’s again is a good idea. What if it’s like last time and nobody goes there?’

‘What would your grandfather tell you to do?’ Jen asks.

I smile as I picture him sitting in his brown plaid recliner. ‘He’d say he didn’t work all those years to save all that money just to have it be for nothing. He’d tell me to try again.’

‘So that’s your answer,’ Ivy says.

‘We need to stop talking about me. This is Callie’s day.’

Trina, Callie’s best friend, comes into the barn with Martha right behind her.

‘I found it,’ Trina says, handing Callie the photo. It’s a photo of Callie’s mom and stepdad and little brother, Ben. They died in a car crash a few years ago, leaving her with no family. She’s kind of like me that way. I have my dad, but he’s never been around.

Callie holds the photo in front of her, her lip quivering, her eyes tearing up. ‘I wish they were here.’

Martha puts her arm around Callie. ‘They are. We just can’t see them.’

Callie nods as Kira hands her a tissue.

Lou comes in. He helped Callie out after her family died and has been like a father to her. He’ll be walking her down the aisle today.

‘How’s my girl?’ he asks, going up to her .

Callie doesn’t answer, still gazing at the photo.

‘Hey.’ He wipes a tear from her cheek. ‘We said no crying today. Your mom wouldn’t have wanted that.’

‘I know,’ Callie whispers.

Lou leans down to her. ‘Your mom’s smiling down on you right now, alongside Nash’s mom, your dad, Ben. They’re all waiting for this wedding to start.’

Callie slips the photo into the top of her dress, just over her heart, then smiles at Lou. ‘I’m ready.’

As I watch Nash and Callie get married, I think about what my own wedding will be like.

Will my dad even show up? He hasn’t shown up for stuff in the past. Birthdays.

Holidays. He’d say he’d come home for them, but a lot of times he wouldn’t.

And like Callie and Nash, I don’t have my mom anymore.

I was so young when she died, I barely remember her.

After the ceremony, everyone goes to the barn for dinner.

The rustic wood tables have orange and white pumpkins down the center with twinkling lights wound between them.

Larger pumpkins of all types and colors decorate the rest of the barn, along with giant pots of orange and yellow mums and tall black lanterns. It’s simple, but pretty.

When dinner is over, the music starts and we all watch as Callie and Nash have their first dance. As the song ends, I hear my phone ringing. I take it out and see my dad’s name on the screen.

‘It’s my dad,’ I say to Sawyer as I get up from the table. ‘I’m going to take it outside so I can hear.’

He nods and watches as I go.

‘Hey, Dad,’ I say, still trying to make my way to the door.

‘Where are you? I can hardly hear you.’

‘I’m at a wedding reception. The music is loud.’ I go outside, shivering when I feel the cold air. ‘Okay, now I can hear.’

‘I won’t keep you. I just wanted to share some news. ’

‘What is it?’ I ask, already feeling nervous. His news usually isn’t good.

‘I got a job,’ he says, sounding excited. ‘It starts in March, after I’m officially retired.’

He means retired from the military. He would’ve stayed in the military forever if they let him. He’s been dreading retirement, not sure what he was going to do.

‘What’s the job?’

‘Same as I’m doing now. Fixing equipment. A buddy of mine who retired last year has been working at this place for a few months now and introduced me to the hiring manager. I went for the interview and the guy hired me on the spot.’

‘Where is it? Where’s the job?’

‘That’s what I wanted to talk to you about,’ he says, his tone turning serious. ‘It’s here in Germany, not far from the base. I know you were hoping I’d come back to the States, but it just didn’t work out that way. You understand, don’t you?’

I don’t, but if I told him that, it wouldn’t matter. He does what he wants. It doesn’t matter that I miss having a dad and want him to come home. He doesn’t think that way. I’ve learned that I just have to accept that.

‘Yeah, of course. I understand. So will you be coming back here before the job starts?’

‘I’m not sure. Janet, the lady I’ve been seeing, wants to take a little trip before I start the job. I told her I’d think about it.’

‘Okay, well, I should get back to the reception.’

‘You’re doing good, right? Making friends in that new town of yours?’

‘Yeah, Dad, I’m good.’ I’m not going to tell him my business failed and the building was vandalized. He wouldn’t care. He wouldn’t offer to help. He’d just tell me I’ll figure it out.

‘I’ll talk to you later, kid. ’

‘Bye, Dad.’

‘You okay?’ I hear Sawyer say.

I turn around and see him standing just outside the door. ‘How long have you been standing there?’

‘I just came out. I thought you might be cold.’ He walks up to me and wraps his suit jacket around my shoulders.

‘Thanks.’ I close the jacket around me, shivering.

‘Let’s go inside. It’s freezing out here.’

I turn back to the orchard, looking out at the darkness.

Sawyer appears in front of me. ‘What’s wrong? What’d he say?’

‘He’s not coming back. He got a job that starts after he leaves the military.’ I pause. ‘It’s in Germany.’

‘Gina, I’m sorry.’ Sawyer gently rubs my arm.

I look down. ‘I shouldn’t be surprised. I should’ve known he wouldn’t come back. He has a girlfriend there, and now he has a new job. His life isn’t here. It never has been. I guess I just thought he’d at least consider moving back since he’s the only family I have left.’

‘You have us. Me. My brothers. My parents.’

I look up at him. ‘Sawyer, I haven’t decided if I’m staying. I love that you and your family offered to help me get G’s back in business, but why do all that work if it’s just going to fail again?’

‘Are you talking about G’s or about us?’ He steps closer. ‘What are you really afraid of Gina? G’s not working out, or us?’

I’d never considered that before now, but what if he’s right?

What if the reason I’m not fighting to save G’s is because I’m afraid to fight for Sawyer and me?

Because I’m afraid if we get back together, I’ll fall even more in love with him and then something will happen to make it end.

I can get over my business failing, but I’m not sure I can get over Sawyer.

I’ve been a mess since we broke up. I’ve been using G’s and the cider competition to distract me, but the pain of our breakup is still there.

It’ll hurt even worse if we get back together and it doesn’t work out.

‘I’m going inside,’ he says. ‘You coming with?’

‘I’ll be there in a minute.’

As he goes back in the barn, my thoughts linger on what he said. He thinks I’m running away. From him. His family. Callie and Lyndsay, who have become like sisters to me.