Page 14

FOURTEEN

One week later, Gray sat at his kitchen table and reread the email that had landed in his inbox on Thursday.

Our man on the inside says there’s a wedding coming up in a few weeks. Any chance you can crash it?

He’d lost count of how many times he’d read that message. And it was the same every time.

He pulled the legal pad he’d been taking notes on toward him and studied the circles and lists and arrows. There was a connection here. There had to be. Something that would make it all clear.

But he couldn’t find it.

He flipped the pages over and started with a blank sheet. At the top of the page, he wrote The Problem in Neeson in block letters.

Underneath it he wrote three headings: Drugs , Trafficking , LEO Involvement .

When he’d come to Gossamer Falls, one of the first things the hiring board did was cover the issues in the nearby counties. There were unique conflicts with each of their neighbors, but Neeson was the problem child. Everyone knew it, and as Meredith’s comments at dinner had indicated, they’d known for decades. They might not have had a handle on the specifics, but the people of Gossamer Falls knew enough to keep their kids out of Neeson.

His brain hiccupped as the image of Meredith sitting at her parents’ table wormed its way into his thoughts.

He’d seen her twice since the debacle last Saturday. He still had no idea how he’d gone from sharing his greatest heartache and her sobbing like her heart was shattered to her calling him a liar and telling him she never wanted to speak to him again.

He’d been a jerk. He would own that. But he wasn’t a liar. He’d told her the truth. And after the way she’d reacted? He hadn’t known she had that level of mean in her. So it was probably for the best.

He tapped the pen on the table.

But ... had he lied with his behavior? He could see her perspective on that. She had no way to know how hard he’d worked to keep his distance. Or how much he’d wrestled with his feelings toward her.

And then there was the kiss. He didn’t believe in accidental kisses. It was extraordinarily difficult to fall into someone else’s lips with your own. And then to stay stuck there? Spend a few blissful moments exploring? No. Kisses might not be planned, but they weren’t accidents.

The knock on his door dragged him back to the present. “It’s open.”

“Shouldn’t the police chief set a good example for his citizens by keeping his door locked?” Cal Shaw came in and walked straight to Gray’s kitchen.

“I am setting a good example. I’m saying, ‘We’re safe here.’ I’m also saying, ‘I can take care of myself.’ And both of those are things the citizens should want from their police chief.”

Cal took a mug from the cabinet and poured himself a cup of coffee. “Someone’s feeling a bit touchy this morning.”

Gray ignored the remark and turned back to the legal pad. Behind him, he heard the fridge open, the splash of cream, the clink of a spoon, the sip. Another thirty seconds passed as Cal rinsed his spoon, put everything away, and joined Gray at the table.

The only sounds around the table were the scratch of Gray’s pen and Cal’s slurping.

“You’re doing that on purpose.” Gray cut his eyes at Cal.

Cal’s response was another, even louder, gulp.

“I’m going to kick you out if you don’t stop that mess.”

“I’m going to keep doing it until you tell me what’s got you growling at everybody you see.”

Gray set the pen down. “Then I hope you enjoy hanging out in an empty house. I’ll go work at my office.”

He held Cal’s stare, and to his surprise, Cal gave in. He took another sip, this time at a normal volume, and set the coffee on the table. “She hasn’t shared. You won’t share. I think Mo knows more than he’s telling. Landry says I have to stay out of it until you want to talk about it. I’m trying to take her advice. I know there’s something up. I’m guessing it’s bad. I don’t know who’s to blame—”

“Me.” Gray wouldn’t give him details, but he also wouldn’t let Cal think any of this was Meredith’s fault.

Cal gave him a long look. “Okay. Thank you for that. I think.”

“You’re welcome. Just know ... that’s all I’m going to say.”

Cal frowned. “Then know that this is all I’m going to say. You’re my best friend. You saved my life—”

“You saved mine.”

“Yeah. But you don’t seem to think that your life matters or that you deserve anything beautiful in it. I don’t know what happened, and I’m not saying Meredith is the answer. But God might have big plans for you that you can’t even imagine, and you refuse to consider them because you’ve decided your own path. Trust me on this. I wouldn’t have chosen the path I took to be where I am today, and there’s still heartache on the edges of my life that I’ve realized will always be there. But I’ve learned a lot since Landry blew all my ideas out of the water. And the main thing is not to expect God to go along with your plans. He has his own plans. And they’re better.” Cal adjusted his ball cap and grinned. “And that’s all I have to say about that. So, why am I here? You called this meeting.”

For his entire adult life, Gray had done his best to keep his relationships to a minimum. But Cal Shaw had shown up in his life and refused to stay out of it. He knew Cal would keep his word, and unless Gray brought it up, he wouldn’t press for more information.

He also knew that he’d be thinking about Cal’s words for a long time. He’d thought his plans were in line with God’s will for his life. But were they? Or had he made plans and then assumed God was on board? And if the plans were his and not God’s...

He set that aside for later. Right now, he needed Cal’s brain. “What I’m about to tell you can’t leave this room.”

Cal straightened and fired off a crisp salute. Which was ridiculous—they’d been the same rank. But he got the meaning.

“A month after I took this job, I was approached by an FBI agent in Raleigh. Special Agent Faith Powell. She’s part of a task force that is made up of FBI, Secret Service, SBI, ATF, DEA, and pretty much a member of every state and federal alphabet-soup agencies you can imagine, including a few you’ve never heard of.”

Cal whistled. “Big time. What did she want?”

“The task force was created to address police corruption across the state. They have multiple cases they’re working. But the reason she called me is that it’s her job to fix Neeson.”

“What’s her plan?”

“It’s a long game. They don’t want the small fish. They want the whale. DEA has a man undercover in Neeson. He’s been there a while, and I have a feeling they want to get this wrapped up.”

“Did our former police chief know about this?” Cal gave him a knowing glance.

“No. The task force deemed him to be too big of a question mark to take him into their confidence. They ran the whole thing without his input, but they brought me on as soon as they could. They’ve kept me in the loop, but most of what I’ve done is provide information when needed and a bolt hole in case their undercover agent needs to run.”

“What changed?”

“Steven Pierce.”

Cal’s knuckles went white. “If you tell me they want to cut a deal—”

“No. Nothing like that.” The entire Quinn clan would lose their collective minds if the man responsible for Cassie’s kidnapping wasn’t punished for his actions. “It’s because of the press. The attention on Gossamer Falls and Neeson didn’t sit well with our drug-running neighbors. They’ve enjoyed years of virtual autonomy. And now there’s a new police chief next door in Gossamer Falls and one of their wealthy and influential clients is arrested for kidnapping and attempted murder. I’m not saying Meredith shouldn’t have helped those women, but the timing stinks. If Steven’s actions kicked the hornet’s nest, Meredith’s may have poured gasoline on it.”

Cal looked at his already empty mug. “I’m going to need more coffee.”

“Not sleeping?” Gray asked as Cal went to the kitchen.

“Landry wasn’t feeling good. She was up several times last night.”

“You should have told me, you moron. We could have talked at your place.”

Cal returned to the table. “Landry’s in her studio. Eliza’s with Mom.”

“No Abby?” Abby and Eliza were best friends. Now they shared a Nana. They were growing up the same way Cal had grown up with Meredith and Mo, and everyone involved was thrilled.

“Mom’s trying to spend time with them individually. She doesn’t want Abby to resent Eliza, and she wants to get to know Eliza away from Abby. She’s set up a plan where the girls go hang out with her one-on-one, and then later the other one joins in the fun. I think they’re planning to pick Abby up for lunch. Who knows what will happen after that.”

Cal looked out the window. “It’s hard to believe all this is going on right next door. I want it to be as safe for the kids as it was for me, Mo, Meredith, and Bronwyn.”

“I’m doing the best I can, brother.”

Cal toasted him with his mug. “I know. What do you need from me?”

“I had a message about the wedding.”

“By the wedding, do you mean the one Meredith’s doing the flowers for?”

“That’s the one.”

“Do you want me to figure out how to convince her not to go?”

“No. I want you to figure out how to be sure she takes me as her plus-one.”

Two hours later, Meredith stopped on the trail they were hiking, picked up a pine cone, and threw it at Cal’s head. “Have you lost your mind? You ask me to come for a little hike, and then you drop this ‘you still have to take Gray to the wedding’ on me?”

Cal didn’t look ashamed of himself. He’d tricked her. Convinced her that what she needed was some fresh air and a hard hike to clear her head.

And she’d been scatterbrained enough to believe him. She’d enjoyed the hike. She always enjoyed the hike. When they were kids, they would go on hikes and pretend that Mo and Cal were Lewis and Clark while she was Sacajawea. It worked great for her because, in her version of the story, she bossed everyone around and told them where to go. The consensus was that she had a better sense of direction than the rest of them, and she’d led them out of a few close calls.

She couldn’t believe Cal had done this. “I’m telling Granny on you.”

“No you won’t.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“What makes you think that?”

“Because if you tell Granny, she’s going to make you tell her what happened with Gray.”

Meredith picked up another pine cone and threw it.

Cal batted it away. “Quit that. You’re mad because I’m right.”

“What I want to know is how you drew the short straw.”

“What do you mean?”

“Why is it you and not Mo having this super-fun conversation with me?”

“Oh, that’s easy. Mo doesn’t know anything about it yet.”

Meredith trudged up the trail and didn’t speak to Cal for a full five minutes. She paused after crossing a small creek and waited for him to join her. “Tell me why.”

Cal did.

And when he finished, she picked up a smooth rock and tossed it into the creek. “Y’all are going to give me whiplash. ‘Don’t go to Neeson. It’s dangerous in Neeson. Stay away. You shouldn’t go to the wedding at all.’ And then you find out someone wants to be sure Gray is at the wedding and it’s all, ‘You have to go to the wedding, and you have to take Gray.’ What happened? Not worried about my safety anymore?”

Cal leaned against an ancient pine and let her vent.

“Why can’t you or Mo go with me?”

Cal pinched his lips together. Was he fighting a smile? “Which one of us do you want to go?”

She opened her mouth to say anyone would be better than Gray, but defeat warred with desperation as the complexity of the situation became crystal clear. “I don’t want either of you to go.” She pointed a finger at Cal. “And you can wipe that smirk off your face.”

“Would you prefer the smirk or for me to point out that I knew this is what you would do?”

“Neither. I want you and Mo to come up with a better plan.”

“Oh, that won’t be hard. Don’t go to the wedding.”

“I have to!”

“You don’t.”

“If I don’t go, how will Gray get in?”

“Gray is the chief of police. He has access to all sorts of people who can figure it out. You, my dear, are a dentist and a civilian. There’s no reason for you to put yourself in danger to make it easier for him to put himself in danger.”

“I’m going.”

“You’ve made that abundantly clear. And as your cousin-brother I’ve already concluded that there’s no way to talk you out of it, and as such, I want you to take Gray. I can protect you. So can Mo. But we have no legal authority to act if things go haywire.”

“Gray doesn’t have jurisdiction in Neeson.”

“He will if he’s acting as part of the task force.”

Meredith gaped at him. “He lied to me. He told me he didn’t have any authority outside Gossamer County.”

Cal frowned at her. “I’m not taking his side, but it isn’t like you to accuse someone of something like that. I don’t know what’s going on with you two. All he would tell me was that it was his fault and to stay out of it.”

He’d told Cal it was his fault?

“He didn’t lie.” Cal enunciated each word. “The way he explained it to me is that day in, day out, he has zero authority outside Gossamer Falls. But if things go south in Neeson, he has the authority to act but only on matters that are specific to the issues that fall under the task force’s purview. He can’t waltz in there and start arresting people willy-nilly.”

Meredith considered his words. “Fine. I’ll concede the point.”

“Big of you, since I’m right and you overreacted.”

“Don’t push me, Cal.”

“What happened?” Cal’s brow wrinkled in confusion. “Where did my sweet, gentle, compassionate Meredith go?”

Despite the tender way the rebuke was delivered, the words stung. “She’s still here.”

“Really?”

“Yes. But not for him. He doesn’t deserve gentle, compassionate Meredith.”

“Why not?” Cal’s frustrated question split something open in her.

“Because I thought I was falling in love with him. Because he’s the only man I’ve had any interest in since the first moment I saw him. Because he’s decided that he’s cursed and can’t have any kind of romantic relationship. And because he didn’t share that fact with me until after he kissed me.” Meredith gasped in a breath. “Or maybe I kissed him and he kissed me back.” She waved a hand. “It’s a blur. The point is, we kissed, and I was so stupid that I actually thought it meant something.”

She wiped a rogue tear from her cheek. “It meant something to me. And I think it meant something to him, but not enough. I’m not enough to pull him out of his self-imposed emotional black hole. And now”—she wiped another tear, or seven—“now I have to go to a wedding with him. A wedding, Cal!”

He winced.

“A wedding with a man I might still be a little bit in love with, and with whom I am definitely a lot in hate with.”

“You don’t hate him.”

“Well, no.” Quinns were taught young not to throw that word around lightly. “I don’t hate him. But I despise him. And I despise myself. I can’t stand to see him, to be around him. It hurts every time. And it’s embarrassing. I’ve been all but throwing myself at him for a couple of years and the whole time, he wasn’t interested.”

Cal looked at the ground. “I’m not convinced he’s not interested.”

She thumped her chest. “I was there for the conversation. Oh, he’s attracted to me. He’ll acknowledge that. But he isn’t interested in a relationship. And I’m interested in nothing less.”

The tears had gotten completely out of hand, and her nose was running. Cal reached into the small backpack he always carried and extracted a handful of napkins. He approached her the way he might approach a rabid raccoon. She probably looked like one.

She took the napkins and tried to dry her face. Cal returned to his spot against the tree and didn’t speak.

When she’d pulled herself partly together, she spoke into the silence. “Now, you tell me that you want me to take him to a wedding where he could be hurt. My choices are to take my brother, my cousin, or the man who stole my heart but doesn’t want it. I don’t want to take any of you! I’m so angry with him that I can barely say his name without feeling the need to go to his house and ... I don’t know ... take all his shoelaces and belts, or replace his coffee with decaf, or put hair remover in his shampoo. That doesn’t mean I want him in harm’s way. How am I supposed to live with myself if I take him to the wedding and he gets killed?”

Panic welled inside her at the idea.

Cal stepped forward and pulled her into his arms. “Mer, I hear you, but if you can’t handle the idea of taking him to the wedding, there’s no way a relationship between the two of you ever would have worked. He’s the police chief. He puts on a bulletproof vest every single day. He carries a weapon to work, and even when he isn’t at work, he’s always armed. He’s always a target.”

She shuddered at his words. “It’s not like he’s in Chicago anymore. He’s in Gossamer Falls. It’s safe here.”

“It usually is.”

Meredith knew Cal was thinking about Landry’s stalker, about Cassie’s kidnapping, and about her punctured fuel line.

Gossamer Falls hadn’t been safe lately.

She pressed her forehead into Cal’s chest. She didn’t want to spend a second with Grayson Ward. Not even one.

But did she have a choice? She’d already stuck her nose in the mess in Neeson. And they knew it. This wasn’t about her, her feelings, or how awkward it would be to spend an evening with a man she was desperately trying to get over. This was about the moms, the kids, the scared faces, the bruised arms, the broken teeth. This was how she could fight back. “He can be my plus-one, Cal. But not my date. You tell him that. He shouldn’t care. It’s not like he wants anything more from me than a ticket to the reception. I’ll do my civic duty. Nothing more.”

Cal squeezed her close. “I’m sorry he hurt you.”

“Me too.”

“Want me to hurt him back?”

“No. He’s your best friend.”

“Want me to break up with him?” There was a tiny bit of humor in Cal’s words, but a strong vein of sincerity as well.

“Don’t you dare.”

“Want to come back to the house and eat ice cream and watch old movies?”

“You hate old movies.”

“But I love ice cream. And I love you. I can endure the movie.”

Meredith stepped away from him and pulled the last dry napkin from her pocket. “This is why you rock at being a girl dad. You’re good with tears and drama.”

Cal looked like he did when he was a kid and got caught doing something wrong. “I’m not really. If you say no to the ice cream, I’m pretty much out of ideas. Also, full disclosure, Landry suggested it.”

Meredith laughed until she cried a little more, but this time the tears were gentle and cleansing. She slid her arm through Cal’s. “I’ll take the ice cream. And then I’ll go work in my shop. I have wedding flowers to finish.”