Page 37

Holy shit! I’ve never felt pain like this before.

So gripping.

So suffocating.

So bloody agonising.

I’m beyond terrified. This isn’t how it was meant to happen.

Not on the dirty ground in a pine forest behind a chapel where I was about to be forced into a marriage I never wanted.

Not because hands shoved me so hard from behind, I couldn’t even stop my fall and protect my baby.

Not going into labour at only thirty weeks with no actual nurse and doctors, just men, dressed in black, claiming to be medics, telling me my baby is coming now.

No… This can’t be happening. Something is terribly wrong.

A scream rips from me as sharp, tearing pain slices through my pelvis. A crushing band tightens around it, so incredibly strong, that I’m forced to pant through it, even though I try to stop myself.

“Okay, Abbey. You need to start pushing. It won’t take much to get this little one out.”

What is he talking about?

There’s a baby about to come out of my bloody vagina! What the hell does he know?!

I want to scream all the words in my head at this stranger, but my body has been possessed by something else, and it’s doing whatever the hell it wants. Because even as I try to fight it, that overwhelming, uncontrollable urge to push, to bear down, rushes through me again, and I heave.

I swear, every single muscle inside me is contracting, forcing pressure down on my pelvis, trying to expel my little baby, far too fragile to leave the safety of my body.

Then, I tense… and the weirdest, most painful sensation I’ve ever experienced explodes between my legs.

“Ouch, fuck! ” I scream, agony ripping from my throat as my eyes go so wide, I fear they’re about to pop right out of my skull.

“That’s it. Keep going,” Dylan urges calmly, and my death grip on Ringo’s hand tightens like I’m trying to break bone.

“What the fuck are you talking about?!” I snarl. “How would you like to squeeze this out of your dick?!”

Dylan, just smirks, completely unfazed by my rage, and Ringo leans in, pressing his lips to the back of my hand, trying to calm me.

“You’re doing so good, Angel. You’re so fucking strong.” His voice holds familiar confidence, but when I look into his eyes, all I see is fear.

I bet he feels helpless right now, so I nod, wanting to reassure him that everything is okay, even though I know it isn’t.

Another contraction crashes into me, my strangled scream rips free, just as uncontrollable as the overwhelming need to push.

“Here it comes!” Dylan yells as I push, my scream turning into one long continuous siren before Ringo joins me, his deep, guttural roar drowning out everything but him.

I need to focus on that. On him, because ohhhh shiiit….

White hot burning pain slices through my core, as a hard, round head scrapes my insides and settles between my legs.

I’m panting, breathing so fast I worry I might hyperventilate, but Ringo grounds me, pressing his forehead to mine.

“You’re a fucking warrior, Angel.”

“I’m a warrior,” I whisper back, as hot tears spring from my eyes.

“One more push, Abbey.” Dylan’s voice cuts through our bubble, and we break apart to look at him. “It’s time to meet your baby.”

I nod, already feeling the next contraction building, so… I surrender.

I give myself over to the most natural urge I’ve ever felt, and I push.

It’s fast, nowhere near as agonising as the others, just the strangest feeling of my baby quickly slipping from me.

Relief slams into me, and then... emptiness.

Dylan’s hands move quickly between my legs, and Clive presses a towel down against my exposed skin, as the realisation of what just happened sinks in.

I just gave birth to my baby.

“Oh my God,” I cry, trying, and failing, to sit up. “My baby.”

“It’s a little girl.” Clive smiles, but even through my exhaustion, I don’t miss the flicker of worry in his eyes.

Something is wrong.

“A girl?” I whisper, blinking past the haze closing in around me.

I’m so tired.

“It’s a little girl,” I repeat softly to Ringo, smiling up at him.

“Yeah, Angel. A girl.” He quickly schools his worry, nodding down at me.

That’s when I realise… my baby isn’t crying.

Do babies even cry when they are born this early?

Glancing down my body at Dylan, I watch as his arms and hands move quickly, busy doing something, the panic creasing his brow unhidable.

“Why isn’t she crying?” I try to sit up, but my arms aren’t strong enough. My whole body feels heavy. “Is that normal? Is it because she came too early?”

My frantic gaze darts between all of them. Even to JD and Murf standing a few metres back behind Ringo.

No one answers me.

“Dylan?!” I cry, panic restricting my airways.

“Fucking answer her!” Ringo snarls, his voice deadly, and Dylan’s worried gaze snaps to mine.

Shit.

His eyes don’t hold reassurance.

They hold sympathy.

“She’s only just breathing,” Dylan says softly. “We need to keep her warm. ”

“Give her to me,” I slur, barely able to lift my hands up to reach for her.

I never knew giving birth would make me this tired. But then again, I didn’t get much time to educate myself on what to expect, other than some online research. But nothing could have prepared me for what just happened. Maybe feeling like this is normal.

“Ringo,” I whisper, dropping my hands to the leafy ground at my sides. “Tear open the front of my dress.”

He nods, no hesitation, ripping the shitty white taffeta apart before the cool air hits my chest.

I don’t even care that my boobs are out. I’ve just flashed the whole forest my hooha, so what’s a pair of tits at this point?

The second Ringo parts the fabric, Dylan gently lays my little baby girl on my chest, and just like that, all the world, every single thing in it, falls away.

It’s just me and her. Here. Now.

She’s so small, and a bit mucky, but I don’t care, because I have my little girl in my arms, pressed to my chest, and she makes a small little noise.

“Oh Bobbi,” I whimper, tears flooding my eyes so fast I can’t blink them away to get a good look at this tiny little miracle resting on my skin.

Right over my heart.

“Bobby?” Ringo’s voice cuts through my little bubble, and the world comes rushing back in.

I nod, as I look up to meet his eyes.

“Yes. Her name is Bobbi Cameron Musgrove. Bobbi with an i.”

I wait a second, watching the man who fought for me from the moment he broke into my parents’ home .

His brows hitch high.

The hardness that normally frames his eyes melts away, and for a second, he doesn’t look like a biker or a soldier, or a savage.

He just looks like a boy, completely undone.

“You’re naming your little girl after my dead brother?” Tears fill his eyes, and he takes in a shaky breath, clearing his throat, struggling with his raw emotions. “You’re naming her after him… and me?”

A smile tugs at my lips as I nod again.

“I decided on the name a few weeks ago,” I whisper. “I knew it would suit a boy or girl.”

I frown, blinking at how slurred my words sound, and Ringo must notice too, his worried gaze shooting to Dylan and Clive, who are still positioned between my legs.

Shit. I kinda forgot they were there.

They’re doing something. Pulling on something inside me, and now that I think about it… it kinda hurts, but also, I feel a little numb.

“Hey.” Ringo’s fingers gently lift my chin, guiding my gaze back to him. “Why did you name her after me and my brother?”

I hug little Bobbi closer, and she makes another little sound.

A fragile little whimper.

“I wanted to name my baby after the man who saved my best friend,” I explain, my lids growing heavier as I shift my gaze between Ringo and my little girl. “So her first name is Bobbi.”

“Bobbi with an i,” Ringo confirms, smiling warmly at me.

“I also wanted to name her after the man who saved me .” I blink slowly at him, my smile barely kicking up my lips as exhaustion blankets me. “So her middle name is Cameron. ”

“Shit… Angel,” Ringo rasps, emotion thick in his voice, and he leans forward, pressing his lips to my forehead just as the sound of a car tearing through the trees, draws everyone’s attention.

Well… everyone’s but mine.

I can’t even muster the energy to turn my head.

“Over here!” someone yells, before heavy footfalls rush from somewhere, and for a moment, I’m relieved.

We are going to be alright.

“Abbey?” Ringo’s voice sounds unsure, right before his palm cups my cheek. “Angel, open your eyes.”

I try to open them, but it’s like they are taped shut. I can’t make them part.

“What’s happening!” Ringo demands, sounding frantic and ragged.

I wish I could open my eyes, because there’s movement from both sides of me, and I want to see what’s going on.

“We have to get them in the van, now,” an unfamiliar voice cuts in.

“Dylan? What’s wrong with her?!” Ringo snaps, ignoring whoever gave the order, his focus just on me.

I try so hard to open my eyes again, this time, I manage a fleeting glance.

Black-clad men blur past, rushing around like shadows in a panic.

“She’s losing too much blood, man,” Dylan snaps. “We need to get her to a hospital.”

“Shit!” Clive’s voice comes from right beside me. “The baby is turning blue!”

My eyes snap open .

All the hazy, the heaviness, the numbness vanishes in one blinding second of terror.

My eyes find Clive looming over me as he rolls Bobbi to her back on my chest, his hand flying in the air. “Hand me the bag!”

“Cam…” I manage to breathe out, my eyelids so heavy, I’m scared that if they close, they’ll never open again.

“I’m here, beautiful.” Ringo turns my head gently, and our eyes lock.

Ooof.

I hate seeing that look in his eyes.

Fear.

I don’t want him to be scared.

“Remember…” My voice is just above a whisper, the energy to speak draining fast. “Save Bobbi… Her life is… more important than mine.”

“Don’t speak like that,” Ringo pleads, cupping my face, his touch trembling even as he tries to stay strong.

Gosh… he really is the most beautiful monster I’ve ever seen.

“Everything I’ve done…”

I force the words out, needing him to hear this.

“Was to protect her.” My words slur, and that’s when I see it… tears, glistening in Ringo’s whiskey eyes.

“Give her my blood… or organs… or anything it… takes,” I whisper, my voice cracking.

My own tears spill over, tracking down into my hair, soaking the dirt beneath me.

“Please… raise her… as your own.”

“Angel, stop. Please. Stop talking like that, ” he begs, pressing his forehead to mine .

I feel my little girl being lifted off my chest. I don’t know if she’s alive, but someone is yelling to keep feeding her oxygen.

“You’re going to be fine,” Ringo says, trying to reassure me, or maybe, he’s just trying to reassure himself.

His lips press to mine in a chaste, wet, salty kiss that tastes of goodbye.

“Angel, please…” he pleads before I feel him shift next to me on the ground. “Someone tell her!” he bellows, begging for backup. “She’s going to be fine!”

I don’t hear anyone answer. There are too many voices now, all deep manly voices, and I know, with them, my little girl will be safe.

“Cam...” I breathe, my lids fluttering closed, now too heavy to keep open.

“Angel…” he breathes over my lips, his nearness filling my heart with one last beat of warmth.

“I love you… But I need you to… let… me… go…”

Ummm… what just happened? Are you ready to find out?

Continue to the next instalment:

BEAUTIFULLY SHATTERED SECRETS AND SCARS BOOK 3