Page 42 of Beautiful Scars: Unshakeable (The Beautiful Scars Duet #2)

Chapter Thirty-Six

Sunny

I stare at the phone, my vision blurring around the edges. The image of Jade burns into my retinas—her terror, her pain, the evidence of what he's done to her already. My stomach heaves, but I swallow it down. I can't fall apart. Not now.

My fingers trace the edge of the screen, hovering over Garrett's message. That single word waiting for an answer, "Trade?"

A bitter laugh escapes my throat. As if there's any choice here.

The phone buzzes again. Another message from Garrett—"Tick tock, Princess."

My hands shake as I type back, "Where?"

His response is immediate, "That's more like it. It’s time for you to come home."

Home. The word twists in my gut like a knife.

Because he's right—this is what I've been running from.

Not just him, but the truth. That no matter how far I've run, how much love I think I've found, how safe I've felt—with him is where I belong.

He made sure of that the day he killed my father and took my family.

Made sure I knew it the first time he held me down and took what he wanted from me.

The next message contains coordinates and instructions. Simple. Clean. A few numbers that are about to destroy my entire world.

I look around the room—our room. Zane's laptop rests on the nightstand. Levi's books are stacked neatly on the dresser. My favorite blanket is thrown over the foot of the bed. All pieces of a life I fooled myself into thinking I could have.

Standing feels like moving through wet sand, every motion slow and heavy. I quickly change into plain clothes—jeans, t-shirt, and boots. Nothing special. Nothing that matters. I don't take anything else. There's no point.

I slip my arms into my jacket, the familiar weight settling on my shoulders. My fingers brush against something in the pocket—the small tracker Z gave me right after Jade disappeared. His voice was firm and left no room for argument when he slipped it in my pocket.

"This is just in case. It will let us find you if we need to. Keep it on you."

I turn the cold, hard plastic disk over and over in my hand. It would be useless for me to take. Garrett isn’t stupid. One of the first things he’ll do is search me thoroughly the first chance he gets.

He'll take my clothes, my shoes, check every possible hiding spot.

But there's one place...

I hurry to the bathroom, my heart pounding against my ribs.

My menstrual cup sits in its little cloth bag under the sink.

I've barely used it since coming here, preferring the tampons Jade bought me.

My hands tremble as I wash it and the tracker.

The device is small enough to fit, a little smaller than a poker chip.

I slide it inside the flexible silicone, take a deep breath, and insert both.

I don't really think it will work.

The only reason I'm doing it is because I can't bear the thought of them finding nothing. No evidence or sign that I cared enough to try. The idea of them knowing that I just gave up completely and none of this meant anything to me—that's worse than anything Garrett could do to me.

At the desk, I pull out a sheet of sketch paper and a pen.

The words come easier than I expected:

I know this is going to hurt both of you, and I'm sorry for that. I know you'll try to find me and I hope you can do it. I did my best to make it as easy for you as I could.

But if for some reason you can't, or you're too late, know that deep down I’ve always thought that this is how it would end for me.

Please, please don't blame yourselves. This was my choice, and I made it knowing what it meant.

He's not going to stop. He won't hurt Jade or anyone else if he has me. I'm what he wants.

Z—Thank you for showing me what safety feels like. For seeing all of me and loving me anyway. I love you from the deepest most pure part of my heart. A part I never would have found without you. Always.

Levi—I never stopped loving you. I need you to know that.

Really know that. This is going to be the hardest for you to accept.

Remember that day at the lake when you told me people could be more than one thing?

I don't have the right to ask you for anything now, but, please, no matter what happens, try to remember the good in you.

I know it's there because you've given it to me.

I love you from the very best parts of myself.

You're good men. I know you're going to tear yourselves apart thinking you failed me.

But you didn't. You gave me time that I got to spend being someone worth loving.

Do you know what a gift that's been? For someone like me?

I got to fall asleep every night between two people who chose me.

Who saw every broken, ugly piece of me and decided I was still worth keeping.

I know what it feels like to be loved completely now, and that is so much more than I ever thought I could have.

You gave me back my heart, and trusted me with yours. I'm only sorry I couldn't keep them safe for us.

Take care of each other. Take care of Jade.

Angel

The tears don't fall until I sign my name. I fold the paper carefully, placing it on the pillow where I sleep between them. The place where I felt whole for the first time in my life.

Another message from Garrett—"One hour. Come alone or she dies."

I double check the coordinates and pull them up on the map. My fingers brush the soft fabric of the pillowcase. For a moment, I let myself remember—Zane's arms around me, Levi's heartbeat against my back, the perfect peace of belonging somewhere.

But I don't belong here. I never did.

This is what Garrett has always wanted. For me to choose him.

To choose the pain and the damage and give myself over to it all, willingly.

He knows me. Knows exactly what buttons to push, what threats to make, what leverage to use.

I'm sure he knew it was only a matter of time before he found the right combination.

I move through the house like a ghost, careful not to make a sound. Everyone is in the security room. I can hear their voices—working on getting the new equipment installed, discussing plans, making calls, trying to find Jade. Trying to protect me.

But they can't protect me from this choice. From what I know I have to do.

I pause by the back door and punch in the security override code.

I have three minutes to get off the property without tripping an alarm.

The back door opens silently. Security is still focused on the front gate damage and making sure no one gets in.

No one's worried about someone getting out. It's almost too easy.

The evening air hits my face, cool and clean. I take one last look at the house—my sanctuary, my almost home—and say a silent goodbye.

Then I turn and walk away, each step taking me closer to where I have always belonged. Back to the monster who's been waiting patiently for me to realize the truth.