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Molly

Unknown Number sent an attachment.

[Link: “Hudson Wilde—Hockey God or Hockey Legend? Why Not Both?”]

Unknown Number: Thought you’d like to read this. Since you’re my #1 fan.

Molly: Who is this?

Unknown Number: You’re joking.

Molly: Sorry, new phone. Lost all myIMPORTANTcontacts.

Unknown Number: You’ve had the same phone since I met you.

Molly: ???♀? I don’t save numbers of men who annoy me for a living.

Unknown Number: That’s a lie. I annoy you recreationally. I don’t even get paid for it.

Molly: That’s unfortunate for you.

Unknown Number: You’re telling me. I’d be a billionaire by now.

Molly: Congrats on the article, though. Truly. You must be so humble about it.

Unknown Number: Humility is for people whoAREN’Tdescribed as a hockey god. I’m just embracing the truth.

Molly: Right, because your ego clearly needed a boost.

Unknown Number: I’m here to inspire. It’s practically a public service.

Molly: You should put that on your résumé. “Hockey god, legend, and part-time philanthropist dedicated to fixing overpopulation by annoying innocent victims to death.”

Unknown Number: Don’t forget “bringer of joy” and “man of the people.”

Molly: Man of the people?????? Who are these people? And are you sure they don’t live inside your head?

Unknown Number: My fans. The same ones who chant my name. Don’t act like you haven’t heard it.

Molly: Oh, I hear it. It’s hard not to when they’re chanting it at decibels that could shatter glass.

Unknown Number: It’s the sound of greatness, Hex. You’ll get used to it.

Molly: I’ll put in earplugs.

Unknown Number: Still won’t drown me out. I’m unforgettable.

Molly: Unbearable is the word you’re looking for.

Unknown Number: Close enough. So . . . you saving this number yet?

Molly: Nah. I’ll just keep calling you “Who is this?” It feels right.

Unknown Number: Unbelievable. I’ll have you know that I’ve been described as a god AND a legend. Yet you’re treating me like a scam caller.

Molly: Honestly, you do give scammer vibes.

Unknown Number: Keep talking to me like this and I’m billing you for my therapy.

Molly: Oh, please, you love it.

Unknown Number: . . .

Molly: We both know you have a degradation kink. Why else would you still talk to me after four years of being thoroughly roasted?

Unknown Number: Shut up and save my number, Hex. You’ll need it when you decide you can’t resist me anymore.

Molly: Don’t hold your breath, Wilde.

Unknown Number: I’ll wait. You’re worth it.

Molly: Nice try.

Unknown Number: So that’s a no on saving the number?

Molly: Hard pass.

Unknown Number: Unreal.

Molly: Go read your article again, Hockey God. Maybe it’ll comfort you.

Unknown Number: Don’t worry. I’ll send you more tomorrow. Can’t let you forget me.