Page 11

“Rugged, maybe.” The lights from the truck reflected off the trees, illuminating the clearing in a soft glow. It’d take a second, but as our eyes settled, we’d be able to make out the hole in the ground and the glow of the water.

“This is my favorite place in Firefly.” If we traveled in any direction, we’d hear the crunch of slate under our feet. Here, the locals had cleared off the rock, treating it like our hidden oasis.

“What makes it your favorite?”

It was hard to put into words, especially to somebody who grew up in the city.

We made fun of the flatlanders, but every person in the northern half of Maine understood we were part man and part nature.

I spent my nights indoors watching television, but I always felt the calling to be outside and part of this place we inhabited.

“When I was younger, I’d play in the woods.” The memory made me chuckle. “I’d slay dragons. I served Firefly as a valiant knight. Not sure why, but I always think about that. It sounds lonely when I say it out loud now, but sometimes the world is just so?—”

“Busy.”

I nodded. As we both grew quiet, the chirps of insects and the distant hoot of a howl filled the gap. “I always felt larger than life and, at the same time, insignificant.”

“You’re anything but insignificant.”

I’m sure I didn’t quite convey the impact of this midway point between civilization and nature. If Simon was going to be a member of Firefly, I needed to indoctrinate him.

I pulled my shirt over my head.

“What’s happening?”

I threw the t-shirt on the truck. Reaching into my pocket, I pulled out two glow sticks. With a quick crack, they turned green. I held them up to my face and gave him an eyebrow waggle. On chains, I fidgeted with the clasp before putting it on Simon’s neck. I did the same for myself.

“It’s so I don’t lose you.”

I kicked off my shoes and pulled my jeans down over my hips. A second later, I wore nothing but my briefs. “It’s my duty as a townie to properly welcome you to Firefly.”

“Will everybody in town be getting naked, or is this just a you thing?”

I reached down and picked up a rock. Chucking it away from the car, I waited for the splash. Simon’s green face looked horrified. Reality had set in.

“You can’t be serious.”

“As a heart attack.”

I hooked my fingers in my briefs. “It’s a Firefly tradition. There are bare bears in these woods.” I dropped my underwear. Standing in all my glory, I didn’t miss him giving me the up and down.

I reached for his tie, giving it a slight tug. Leaning in close, I breathed him in. My pillows would smell wonderful bathed in his scent. I whispered in his ear, “Unless you’re too much of a city boy.”

I turned and ran.

Ten feet, and then I pushed off, arms wrapped around my legs. I hit the water with a boom. The heat from the rocks kept the water warm enough for swimming. In a couple weeks, the chill would set in, and I’d have to worry about shrinkage. When I surfaced, I sucked in a breath of air.

“The water’s fine!”

I floated on my back, staring up at the stars.

Even with the truck lights, the sky was filled with thousands of tiny dots.

I could stay out here all night dreaming about faraway galaxies.

Stress from the comic shop washed away. The convention was all but a distant memory.

The world turned quiet as I bobbed in the water.

After a minute, I worried Simon had gotten in the truck. Had I pushed too hard? Did I break my city boy? “Is everything okay?” Had I overstepped my boundaries? Maybe it wasn’t cool to get naked unless we were?—

“Holy shit!”

I barely noticed the flailing man as I followed the green rectangle over the edge of the quarry. He hit the water with enough force a wave rolled over my face. When he didn’t rise to the surface, I kicked myself for not asking if he could swim. I prepared to dive for Simon when he bolted upright.

“Oh my God,” he yelled. “Did I just — I just — It’s so cold!”

I cackled. Spoken like a true city boy. “It’s official. You’re one of us now.” I wanted to make a joke at his expense, but my brain replayed the flailing bear. Wait, was he naked?

“This is hazing,” he said. “I can’t believe I did that.”

“Maybe you have a little country in you.”

“Payback for putting a little city in you?”

I nearly choked. Even the cold water couldn’t stop my little friend from jumping upright. With miles between us and the town and not another soul in sight, I gathered the bravery to ask the question that had been pounding away at my brain since our day in the backroom.

“What was the other day?” I blurted it out with no finesse. This moment played out in my head a thousand times. I needed the answer for my sanity. However, the moment the words left my mouth, I feared the answer wouldn’t live up to my fantasy.

“I’m going to need more information.”

With a couple of strokes, he tread water in front of me. The two glow sticks created a soft green glow in the water. It was impossible to see the white stripe through his chest hair, but it was there. I knew it, but I also remembered feeling it against the palm of my hand.

I could have changed the subject without him knowing. However, I owed it to myself to get to the bottom of it. “In the comic shop. You might find this hard to believe, but it’s not often I hook up with a hot bear in the backroom.”

“No? I’d assume you were beating them off with a stick.”

I refrained from making a ‘beating them off’ joke. “My life isn’t that exciting.”

Other than the slight sloshing of water and symphony of crickets, the quarry grew quiet.

I wanted to kiss him. My lungs wanted to fill with his cologne and have it burned into my memory.

I could lie to myself and blame the environment.

Every inch between us felt like an eternity, and I wanted to close the space.

“Honestly, I don’t know what came over me. I just…” His voice trailed off. Had Simon never considered the possibility he liked men? I hadn’t been part of somebody’s coming-out story since college. None of them had been through a divorce.

“It’s okay. You don’t owe me an explanation.” I wanted one, but it didn’t entitle me to an answer. I had come storming out of the closest in a burst of glitter. Not everybody had the luxury of being their authentic selves.

“It wasn’t my first time.” The words were almost a whisper. “My roommate in college, we sort of had a thing.”

I had watched plenty of porn with that exact plot. I’d file that away for masturbatory fantasies later. “That explains why it was so damned good.”

“I’ve thought about it plenty, but it’s hard to explain. I mean, you’re sexy on your own. But when you offered to help with Lucas… I don’t know. Can paternal instincts be sexy?”

I hadn’t thought of it like that. Did my love for comics and desire to help his kid read get me laid? If that were the case, I’d be giving Simon more comics as soon as we got dry.

“Maybe I’m gay.” He gave a slight shrug, his face dipping into the water. “Bi? Would it be cheating to say I’ve never given it a label?”

I had heard the statement before. After all the changes in his life, this might not be at the top of his priority list. I wasn’t in a rush to slap a label on him. This was his journey, and I’d follow him as he walked it. I hoped his path to self-discovery included me.

Moving closer, I gave him a peck on the lips. “Not cheating at all.”

His smile said I made the right decision. If Simon needed time, I’d gladly give it to him. It might result in our connection being nothing more than a friendship. I’d be sad we didn’t have a repeat performance. I don’t know if it’d ever be quite enough for me. That was my baggage to sort through.

“So, I heard from Dorothy, who talked to Gladys, who mentioned?—”

“I can’t believe any of them. Is nothing sacred?”

He laughed. “Abraham said you didn’t think this was a date.”

I’d have to move if I ever wanted privacy. I suspected that Abraham knew his comment would travel across town. My wingman’s duties didn’t end when Simon asked me to hang out.

He swam close, his belly pressed against mine.

“I assure you,” he whispered. “It’s a date.”

It had been almost an hour of lying on our backs staring at the stars.

Despite this canopy of awe above us, I could only think of his pointer finger running along my knuckles.

With every rise and fall, I waited to see if it’d come to an end.

I breathed a sigh of relief as he continued in the other direction.

“This is what I needed.”

“Easing into the country life?”

We had spread out towels on nearby rocks and sat in the open as we dried.

The temperature dropped as the evening chill set in.

The rock had lost its warmth. How cheesy would it be if I rolled over and draped myself across his body?

Was that too much? Too forward? I understood Amanda’s point. Dating was not my forte.

“I could definitely get used to this.”

I turned. The glow sticks had faded, and now we relied on the truck’s headlights.

I couldn’t help but stare at Simon. Using the word handsome didn’t do him justice.

Even though he lay there butt naked, I couldn’t take my eyes off his face.

I had spent countless hours at the quarry but never with somebody who amazed me more than the landscape.

He pulled my hand to his mouth, giving it a kiss. “This too.”

I half expected my chest to explode and fireworks to zip into the air. I didn’t know what to say. “Aww.” Nope, that wasn’t the right thing. “Yeah.” Also not right. He had come in with a smooth line that pumped me full of feelings and I couldn’t manage a monosyllabic reply that sounded genuine.

“Ignore me. My mouth doesn’t work when my heart is drowning in feelings.”

“Oh, good. I’m not the only one.”