Page 57 of Be My Brayshaw (Brayshaw High 4)

Heat builds in my chest at the way her eyes soften when met with mine.

“Why? Why’d you do it?”

I had no intention of whispering, but for some reason my words are low. Heard around the room, but low, nonetheless.

“Because she deserved it.”

“She should have been with me,” I force past clenched teeth, unable to swallow beyond the ache in my throat.

“But she wasn’t,” she breathes, sorrow woven in her words. “So I did what I thought was right, or as right as right could be then.”

“You spied on us,” Royce spits.

She nods but doesn’t look away from me. “Yeah, I did. Every single day until Raven finally arrived and I’d do it all over again, even if I ended up right here in the end.”

Her deep brown eyes beg me to ask, and everything inside me fights not to, screaming we can’t trust her answer anyway, but closed mouths don’t get fed… I want to believe in the girl in front of me.

“Why?”

Her chest falls with a silent exhale and she says, “Because Zoey deserved to have you when she couldn’t, to know you when she didn’t yet. To hear the sound of your voice, to picture your face, to picture all of your faces.” Her hands twitch at her sides, and I know she wants to reach out and touch me, but that’s a comfort she’s unsure she’ll get. “You have always been her favorite show, and she’s the little girl she is, because of you.” She looks across my family. “Because of all of you.”

My eyes fall to the carpet, and I take a deep breath.

My baby girl, a healer by nature, sweet and innocent and kind, nothing like us in that sense, yet everything we needed and dare I say, at the perfect time.

Royce needed someone to love him purely before he lost all hope in himself.

Maddoc, approaching fatherhood, needed affirmed proof of goodness in our dark, twisted world.

Raven needed hope, a reason to believe she’s worth the life she now lives.

My dad needed a second chance.

And me, I needed help fulfilling my purpose.

I’ve always felt like the father, even though my brothers are the same age. Like we’re witnessing more often with Zoey, my brothers and I each have natural instincts, whether we were born this way, or if our lifestyle demanded the skill, I don’t know, but for as long as I can remember, mine was to listen and learn, to teach and help guide. I think each of us has felt something missing at one point, and my missing piece was Zoey.

A lot happens in the course of a lifetime, and for whatever reason, becoming a father at fifteen was what I was meant for.

My eyes flick between Victoria’s.

The comfort Zoey felt so easily wasn’t simply because she’s young and unaware, but because she already loved us, each of us.

She gave this to me, to my daughter, to my family.

“You said when I finally arrived.” Raven steps closer, pulling my attention to her.

Victoria’s brows crash together, and she licks her lips.

“It was you...” Raven drags off. “You’re the one who told Collins Graven, the chosen grandson of the man who raped our mothers, the person who tried to tear me away from this place, take over this town and leave this family bleeding, who I was and when I’d be here.”

“The fuck?” Royce shouts, he and Maddoc hopping to their feet.

I jerk back.

She doesn’t deny it, shocking us all when she unapologetically admits an even bigger secret. “I was the one who convinced them to bring you home in the first place.”

Shock flies through me, stiffening my body as I try to make sense of her words.

Raven lurches forward but freezes in place when Victoria adds, “I knew you’d be taken care of, at your own hand or theirs. I could only protect one of you.”

Raven’s jaw is clenched tight as she glares at her sister.

Victoria lifts her hands. “I picked her... just like you would have.”

“Fuck you for what you did,” she whispers, and without warning, punches a hole through the wall at the side of Victoria’s head.

“Raven!” Maddoc barks, bounding toward her.

“And fuck you even more for being right,” she growls, rushing out.

“Goddamn it,” Maddoc hisses and chases after her.

I stare at the empty doorway, slowly swinging my eyes back to Victoria.

All the trouble we dealt with the last several months, the pain she caused my family, almost cost us my brother when he disappeared as Raven slipped from his grasp, both of us landing ourselves in the hospital...

My baby girl being safe and away from it all...

A heavy weight descends on my chest and I can hardly fucking breathe, can’t look at her.

I know I’d cave right here, right now, if I did.

I’d fall to my fucking knees, grab and pull her close, and maybe I should, but I don’t have to decide, and the struggle only gets worse when Victoria proves to understand me, walking out before I’m forced to face her.