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Page 95 of Baxter's Right-Hand Man

“So…will they follow me everywhere? Will they follow my friends? And what about innocent bystanders? I hadn’t seen Tony in two years. Is someone going to make up a story about him leaving his husband for me? He’s a cop, Pierce. That shit doesn’t fly in his department and I’m not heartless enough not to care that other people might get screwed over because they know me.”

“I get that.”

I set my hand on his shoulder as the full weight of his reality sank in. “I can’t believe you deal with this all the time. It’s scary.”

“Yeah. Sometimes it’s no big deal. But on slow news days, they don’t let up. They follow you everywhere, like locusts looking for something to feed on. They research your life, your friends, your exes, your pets…everything about you is free game. Something to buy and sell for profit. It’s a fucking circus.”

“Oh.”

“I’m used to it, but I’ve never had to worry about how this affects someone I care about till now. I would never forgive myself if something happened to you.”

The bells were louder than ever.

“I’ll be okay.”

Pierce straightened, his gaze still locked forward. “I was thinking we could just continue like this…talk all the time, text all day, and that maybe you could come visit me in Toronto or Romania or Germany or wherever the fuck I am. I’d fly you first-class, put you up at the best hotels, and come visit you. That might not work now. But we could change the narrative, altogether.”

“How?”

“We could say you reallyaremy assistant and that we got caught in a moment of madness. It would make waves, but it would fade if we were careful.”

“Or it could get worse.”

He sighed. “Definitely. I just found out that my brother hired a lawyer who’s talking to the studio’s lawyer in the hopes of avoiding a full-on Allen family brawl about an inheritance that doesn’t exist. So, yeah…that’ll be fun too.”

“Jesus.”

“I’m not painting a pretty picture, am I? It’s kind of fucked and it’s another needless complication.”

Tears threatened as realization dawned…I was a complication too.

I was a new loose end, a distraction. Just being associated with me pulled attention from his films and his activism. No one would be talking about the charities he was involved with; they’d be too busy speculating over Pierce’s love life and his horrible family. My presence only made things worse.

Not better.

Not now.

I was worried about my safety, but Iwasthe danger.

It was a warped version of Tony and me all over again. I was fucking up his career.

I swallowed around the cotton ball lodged in my throat. “This isn’t going to work, is it? Me and you?”

Pierce went perfectly still.

“Don’t say that. It just won’t be easy. That’s all,” he said softly. “Look, I want to take away your worries and promise you I can make everything okay. I want to wake up with you every morning and fall asleep with you next to me at night, but it’s so fucking selfish of me. I feel like I’m springing a trap on you. I don’t want you to hate me for putting you in a cage.”

“I could never hate you,” I whispered. “I love you.”

Oh, God. Did I say that out loud?

Oh, fuck. No, no, no.This was not okay.

He snapped his chin my way. “You…”

“Yes, I do, but…we can be friends,” I said in a rush. I blinked away tears and sniffed. “I’m here for you. Always. Call me tomorrow or when you get home or next year or…when you feel like talking to someone who knows you suck at Scrabble and don’t know how to chop onions.”

Pierce blanched. “I don’t want to be your friend.”