Page 47 of Anything for You (Veterans of Silver Ridge #7)

CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN

Dorian

B ear leaned his head against my shoulder and made a sound that roused me enough to get my bearings.

“Hey, buddy. I’m good. You need to go out though, don’t you?

” I spoke quietly, not ready to wake from the dream of the last few days.

I was resting on the couch because I hadn’t slept much.

First, because Dove had… occupied my time and thoughts.

And then second because we’d had a series of issues on the farm and I’d been working like crazy.

The doorbell rang then and I realized I must’ve missed the first ring because Bear jumped and edged toward the door as if to say, “Did you hear it this time? Come on. ”

“Got it, bud.” I slipped my feet back into my sneakers and shuffled to the door. Without looking, I swung the door open, surprised to find three faces peering back at me.

Kenny’s face fell the instant he saw me scrubbing at one eye .

“Were you asleep? In the middle of the day?”

The edge of panic in his voice was like a punch to the gut. “I was just tired. We had some issues on the farm and I’ve been busy.”

“You’re not sleeping. That’s usually not a great sign,” Beast grumbled, though concern shone in his eyes.

“Come in and get out of the chill,” I said, frustrated that I hadn’t communicated with them enough for them to know I was doing okay.

This was a rather unstealthy wellness check and though I loved them for it and would never begrudge them the check-in since they’d literally saved my life in the past, I didn’t want them worrying over me.

They plodded in, crisp brown leaves swirling in the driveway and up onto the porch as I shut the door behind them.

Once everyone had settled and Bear had taken up his post next to his beloved Beast, his most favorite person with the possible exception of Tristan and now, Dove, I braced for the conversation.

“I really am doing well. I haven’t gotten much sleep lately. Things with the farm have been busy.” I folded my hands, not wanting to come out with everything if I didn’t have to.

“Wouldn’t you be toast and fall right to sleep? Is it anxiety? Or nightmares?”

Kenny’s worry radiated off him. As much as he tended to be an optimist and steady when things were going wrong, I’d learned I was a bit of a soft spot for him.

Remembering this helped me not give in to the frustration flirting at the edges of my mind. “No. Nightmares haven’t been a persistent problem. Generally, I think my anxiety is really well-managed. And since I know you’ll want to ask, I have been keeping Dr. Corrigan informed.”

Kenny visibly relaxed. Luc seemed the calmest, and Jude ran a hand over Bear’s head in gentle strokes, my dog blissed out with the affection.

After a beat, Luc asked, “What about Dove?”

I knew it was coming, but I hadn’t guarded against it carefully enough. One hand scrubbed over my beard, but Kenny detected the smile despite my efforts.

“Oh, hell yes! Tell us everything!” He practically bounced out of his seat, the former energy filled with concern shifting to something explosively excited.

“Things are going well.”

He leaned forward, and Jude and Luc’s attention had intensified.

“And? Come on, do I have to beg? I will. I think we all know I am not above begging to hear how my dear friend is doing with the first woman he’s dated in… ever?”

I rolled my eyes, Jude loosed a low chuckle, and Luc nudged him likely in an effort to get him to calm himself a bit.

The only way to actually make that happen would be to ride the approaching wave.

“We’ve gotten really close,” I said, heat hitting my cheeks right as Kenny let out a ridiculous, “Oooo!”

“That might be… part of what’s kept me up this week.”

Kenny gasped, then cackled. “All right, Stone. Get it.”

I scowled, and Luc elbowed him in the ribs while Jude shot him a glare.

“I didn’t mean it like that.” We’d talked a lot, and since we both worked during the day and being away from each other had been increasingly more difficult, we ended up staying awake far too long into the night.

Granted, I also did mean it like that, but he didn’t need to be commenting like some kind of immature frat boy .

“Pretty serious, then?” Jude questioned.

They knew we were together, but I’d kept a lot to myself. It hadn’t seemed fair to Dove for me to tell these guys how I felt before I talked with her about it, but now that we had, it made sense to share with them.

“I told her I love her.”

Kenny fell back into the couch with a hand over his heart.

After a beat, Luc asked, “And?”

I fiddled with a thread on my jeans, but ultimately the blazing smile won out. “Apparently, she feels the same.”

The explosion of cheers sent Bear into a barky celebration right along with them. Kenny launched out of his seat and pulled me up into a hug. Luc and Jude joined him, patting my back and grinning with so much genuine happiness for me, it snagged in my chest.

Maybe it was the lack of sleep, or maybe it was that these men had been with me through the worst days of my life and it felt like I’d been living the best ones for a while now. When we all settled back into our seats, I couldn’t miss the chance to say as much.

“I’ve been thinking a lot about how my past with depression and PTSD, and even my current issues, will affect Dove.

We’ve talked about it on and off since pretty early on—first generally in terms of if I were to date someone, and obviously now, specifically regarding how these things might affect her. ”

They each listened in their own way—Jude with his focus back on Bear, Luc straight on with an unreadable expression, and Kenny with a frown grooved into his face, no doubt ready to defend me against Dove or myself.

“It’s reality. And I don’t think she’s being tricked into this—I’ve had some rough moments, and you’ve seen how great she is in social circumstances.

” They’d seen us leave early at the book signing last week, and I’d mentioned how kind she’d been at Kenny’s wedding months ago, long before we were dating.

“She’s a good egg, that’s for sure,” Kenny said. “I wouldn’t have recommended just anyone to be your tenant.”

We chuckled for a minute at his excellent screening process, then I continued, needing to tell them what sat at the heart of my thoughts lately.

“I’ve been worried my baggage would harm her—that I’d hold her back or keep her from realizing some big dream she has for herself.

And”—I gestured for Kenny to calm when he interrupted, springing to my defense—“she’s helped me understand I don’t need to worry.

It doesn’t mean we won’t have things to deal with, but that she doesn’t feel she’s compromising by being with me.

She seems to think it’s a good deal for her, too. ”

“It is. You’re one of the best people on this planet. If she doesn’t realize that, then she’s?—”

“She does, man. She does. He just told us she gets it,” Jude said, calming Kenny’s rising energy.

“Exactly, she does. And all of this is good for you to get about our relationship, but I’ve also been thinking about how I’m only ready now—ready for her—because of you guys.

” My throat tightened, and all of their faces watched as I cleared my throat to finish.

“Beyond the fact that I literally wouldn’t be here, you’ve taught me how to talk through my feelings.

You’ve taught me how to calm down, how to look forward, and honestly, how to love.

I don’t know how well I did that back in the day, but I think I’m decent at it now.

I know a big part of that is because of how well you guys have cared for me when I needed it, both when I knew it and when I didn’t. ”

Kenny’s lips pursed dramatically as he jammed the heels of his hands into his eyes and sniffed. Jude cleared his throat and nodded. Luc offered a gentle smile.

“Okay, I didn’t have crying on my radar for today, but I have to say I think you might be giving us too much credit. I mean, your therapist helped a little. ” Kenny held his hands up in a pinch.

All of us laughed, knowing full well Dr. Corrigan and my doctors back in North Carolina had played huge roles in my recovery.

“Yeah, maybe. But you guys, and Doc, Oak, Bruce…” I shook my head. “I’m grateful.”

Kenny beamed, the little softy’s eyes glittering. “Yeah, well, that’s what family does.”

Jude and Luc agreed, and I did, too. Because that was the reality here.

That’s what they’d offered me so stoutly and insistently.

My own family had never felt like this. The only child of parents who probably shouldn’t have had kids, I’d hardly spoken to them save birthdays and holidays in the last twenty years.

I’d never had hard feelings about that, especially because when I’d needed help, when I’d needed hope , my chosen family had been there.

Whether it was the bonds of war and service that roped us together, or whether it was the grit and engrained stubbornness of us as individuals that did it, I would thank God every day for the rest of my life for these men.

If Dove had shown up in my life five years ago, I wouldn’t have even seen her.

Even two years ago, I was struggling through learning life here in Silverton.

A year ago, I was improving consistently, but still needed to focus on establishing the pattern of my life in a new phase—out of the military, in the wide world.

That we’d come together now would never cease to be a miracle for me. And as I grinned back at my own personal miracle workers, I couldn’t wait for more chances for Dove to be a part of this family.

To maybe be a part of this larger one, and make a smaller one of our own.