Page 42 of An Unwanted Widow for the Duke (The Unwanted Sisters #3)

Chapter Thirty-Three

J ust as Wilhelmina expected, Elizabeth welcomed her warmly. When the two of them were together, it didn’t seem to matter that they had different mothers. They were simply sisters.

“I don’t know if it’s the light, but you look thinner,” Elizabeth noted, concern seeping into her voice. “Is Talleystone starving you at his house?”

Wilhelmina chuckled, although she wondered if it sounded nervous. “No. There’s always so much food on the table, and mostly just the three of us.”

“Then what?” Her sister sounded genuinely confused.

“Gerard and I are… well, we are at odds,” Wilhelmina confessed, biting her lower lip.

Elizabeth’s face softened.

Wilhelmina knew that her sister had noticed her calling her husband by his given name. But Lizzie, being Lizzie, did not mention it at all. Instead, she led her to the sofa and offered her a glass of wine.

She sat across from Wilhelmina, simply waiting.

She was the right choice.Meek and mild, but wiser than most people gave her credit for.

“I thought we were already building toward something more,” Wilhelmina mumbled. “He said that was what he felt, as well. Now, he looks at me as if I were the one who betrayed him. It is as if he could not trust me anymore, just because—” She stopped herself.

Nobody else knew Robert’s secret, aside from Gerard. If only her husband knew how hard it was for her to share even with her siblings, and that keeping the secret wasn’t just an option that she wielded over his head.

“He doesn’t trust you?” Elizabeth frowned. “You? You, who tells people what you think, no matter what? Now, let us focus on what’s important. Do you even want him?”

Did she even have a choice on the matter? Women got married for protection. They might seek love, but most of the time, they could only hope for it. Only dream of it. Wilhelmina had thought she was close to that, only to realize she had been wrong.

Her eyes stung as images of what she had considered her family flooded her mind—Gerard smiling softly at her whenever he thought she wasn’t looking, and Hector laughing appreciatively at their little adventures in the house and the gardens.

They were so happy.

“I do,” she murmured. “I didn’t think I would, Lizzie. I never intended for this to be?—”

She paused. Was she just about to say that it had become real?

She tried to shake the cobwebs that seemed to be forming in her head.

“Do not give up, my dearest. Your husband seems like a man who needs his quiet before he can get back to the world of the living. Let him be, for now,” Elizabeth advised.

It would be difficult to explain to her that it was not as simple as that.

Meanwhile, in Talleystone, Gerard was on his third or fourth glass of brandy.

If he were being honest with himself, he did not know how much he had already drunk that night.

He had tried to focus on the amber liquid, but Wilhelmina’s face kept flashing before him.

He could still see it even when he closed his eyes.

Sleep had eluded him since she left. It was a wonder that he used to long for silence when he needed rest. But this time, the house was too quiet. It mocked him.

Gerard did not realize how much Wilhelmina had changed the house with her gentle laughter and light footsteps.

Hector seemed to feel the same way. The boy had been lonely before Wilhelmina, but he was distraught after she left. He was quieter, not up for chatter or play, and would even submit to his tutor without complaint.

Those little details gnawed at Gerard’s conscience. It was all his fault.

The door creaked open, the sound soft but loud against the silence. Little feet shuffled in.

“Papa?”

Gerard turned around, his drowsiness suddenly gone. His son wore a nightshirt that trailed on the floor, making him look small.

“It’s late, Hector. You should be in bed,” he managed to say without slurring. His voice was soft—softer than it had ever been for the last few weeks.

“I couldn’t sleep,” Hector whined. He climbed onto the chair opposite the desk, his eyes narrowed on his father. Probing. “Why didn’t you tell Lady Mina to come back?”

“She’s with her sister. She missed her. So, we should let her spend some time there; she will return when she is ready.”

“Do you think she’s happy there?” Curiosity knitted Hector’s brow.

“Of course,” Gerard replied. It was a lie. He didn’t really know if Wilhelmina was happy with her sister, but he hoped that she was feeling more at ease. “She and her sister are very close.”

“Well, I don’t really know what that’s like,” Hector said with a shrug, his eyes scanning the study as if he would find an answer to his questions there.

“What are you talking about?” Gerard asked with a frown.

“I don’t know what it’s like to have a sibling,” Hector explained mournfully.

Gerard had never really thought of having another child after Hector. He already did not know what to do with his only son, and it would not be fair to have another child for the sake of it. But somehow, the thought now makes his chest tighten.

Perhaps he was selfish when he decided to ask Wilhelmina to marry him. He had thought he was doing her a favor, what with his money and status protecting her.

But children?

He told her he wasn’t interested in having more without even asking her what she wanted. Her marriage to Robert was a farce, although she said they had tried to give it the semblance of a true one.

“It’s not always perfect, Hector,” he murmured.

It was true in a sense. Some siblings did not get along.

“Oh, I guess that’s true, Papa,” Hector said, a little resigned. “But I hope Lady Mina will come home soon because you look sad all the time. When you are sad, I am sad, too. I want you to be happy and not alone. I want you to be with Lady Mina, although you always told her to leave.”

“I didn’t always tell her to leave, Hector,” Gerard protested, his voice edged with warning.

“You did.”

“Go to bed,” he sighed, squeezing his eyes shut even as his son continued to stare at him accusingly.

“But Papa?—”

“Now, Hector. Where is your governess, anyway? Where are your?—?”

What he meant to say was, where were all the people he paid to mind his son?

Yes, they were there, but Hector only ever became happy when Wilhelmina came along. It all started with her column. Hector didn’t even know who she was back then, but somehow he found comfort in her.

“Now,” Gerard repeated, more gently.

The boy hopped down from his chair, gave him a sullen look, and ran out the door. Gerard was left with the stench of self-loathing.

A knock sounded at the door not long after.

Gerard groaned. He already had an idea who it was. Samuel had been lingering in his home lately, trying to see if he could be saved.

Of course, he could not.

Samuel entered the room without even waiting for his permission. He looked at him with disappointment, especially after he scanned the room and found the empty bottles and the nearly drained glass.

He wrinkled his nose.

“You look like a wreck, old chap,” he drawled. His tone might have been teasing, but his eyes were grave.

“Go home, Samuel,” Gerard grunted, even as he straightened up.

He knew that the room smelled terrible and that he looked in need of a bath.

“I don’t understand what’s going on with my good friend. So, you can’t tell me to just up and leave,” Samuel shot back, lowering himself onto the chair that Hector had vacated earlier. “Here you are, drinking yourself to oblivion, while your dear wife is at her sister’s.”

Gerard was suddenly alert. He had been drinking, but he was not so drunk that he had voiced his thoughts to his friend.

“How do you know Wilhelmina is with her sister?” he asked.

“I merely had to use my eyes and ears,” Samuel replied with a slight shrug.

Again, his friend looked like he was making light of the situation, but his eyes told a different story.

Gerard was alarmed. If Samuel could find out just like that, then perhaps the rest of the ton knew about the visit. Some might dismiss it as a familial visit and nothing more. However, others might be more suspicious.

“The problem with you is that you are letting your fears become reality by being too…” Samuel faltered, sighing.

“You should not be sulking here. Stop living with the ghosts of your past and go chase your happiness. You may not tell me much, but I’ve seen you happy with your Duchess.

She might just be the best thing you’ve had in your life after Hector. ”

Gerard placed his fists on the desk, saying nothing. It was tempting to simply agree with his friend.

He wanted to believe that he had a chance at happiness, but he was the one who drove Wilhelmina away.

And he couldn’t believe there was a world where he deserved her forgiveness.