Page 111 of Always Mine

I’m convinced your brain has turned to mush from being stuffed in a helmet for too long.

Sebastian:

Bella Donna is fully prepared to welcome our boy home in style. See you all there at 8 p.m.

Luca:

I’m in.

Evie:

I’ll be there.

Stella:

Can’t wait to celebrate our hero!

Sophia:

We’ll be there!

Marco:

Boys, I think the real reason for this group chat is so the girls can just speak for us.

Raf has left the chat

Chiara has added Raf back to the chat

Chiara:

Raf will be there. He’s my ride.

Luca:

That’s lucky. He needs a passenger to keep him company.

Raf:

No comment.

Chapter seventy-eight

Home Sweet Home

Marco

Recliningonthechaiselongue, I laugh and shake my head as I click out of the new chat thread Chiara created. I muse at how good she is at running point on distraction and diversion, just like I asked her to.

Perks of being first cousins, I guess. Being stuck in a hospital bed with just my big bad thoughts gave me some time to process the truth of my family lineage, to ponder if there was anything growing up that made me feel that a piece of me was missing. But the truth is I had everything I ever wanted. Amazing parents. Endless opportunities. A home filled with love. Samuel kept his dying wish to Roberto. As fucked up as it is to learn this truth about yourself at almost thirty years of age, I guess the maturity of the wisdom I’ve gained has helped me to reconcile why my parents did it, and instead of resentment, I’ve given them the grace we all need to come to terms with the fall out together.

Chiara’s blood literally saved my life, so you could say now our bond is thicker than water. We’ve spent hours chatting about her childhood and life growing up as part of one of the ruling Mafia families in Italy. One that still very much rules with an iron fist,with chapters even here in New York. She told me about relatives I never knew existed and a life my dad wanted me to have no part of. Her dad, Vinny, short for Vincenzo, was my dad’s twin. And in a tragic twist of fate, he and his wife died a few years ago, which is how she came to live with her uncle Gino. AJ had already moved to New York by that time but visited often.

There’s still a sting of betrayal that my parents kept something so intrinsic to who I am from me, so I’ve started therapy alone and some sessions with my parents to work through the trauma of that night I was shot together. The nightmares started while I was still in the hospital, a replay of that night, but each time it was a different person I couldn’t save bleeding out in my arms. Like my mind was twisting the facts of my experience with what I learned about my biological father’s death, then remixing them into my worst nightmares.

The most horrifying was the one where Sophia was waiting for me in the piazza in Italy, beaming at me like the sun. But someone beat me to her, and the next thing I knew, she was on the ground in a tide of crimson.

Seeing life through some of Chiara’s lived experiences has helped me understand why Samuel felt enough conviction in the dying wishes of my father that he would stick to his word.