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“Deal.”
He takes my hand again. “All right then! Let’s go back down.”
When we walk back downstairs, Hardin and Molly are still on the couch, but Hardin now has a drink and Molly has moved so her legs are draped over him from the side. When Hardin’s eyes dart down to where my hand is intertwined with Zed’s, I jerk away without thinking, but then grab it again quickly. Hardin clenches his jaw and I look away into the crowd of partiers.
“How was it?” Molly smirks.
“Fun,” I answer and Zed stays quiet. I will thank him later for not correcting me.
“It’s Molly’s turn,” Nate announces as we sit back on the floor.
“Truth or dare?” Hardin asks her.
“Dare, of course.”
And Hardin looks right into my eyes and says, “I dare you to kiss me.”
My heart stops, literally. It stops beating; he is a bigger asshole than I ever imagined. My ears are swimming and my heart is pounding as Molly shoots a boastful glance my way before she latches herself to Hardin. All the anger I feel toward Hardin is washed away and replaced by hurt, all-consuming hurt and the feel of hot tears on my face. I can’t watch anymore, I just can’t.
Within seconds, I’m on my feet and pushing through the drunk crowd. I hear Zed and Steph both call after me, but the room feels like it’s spinning and when I close my eyes all I can see is Molly and Hardin. Knocking into people and not looking back, I finally reach the door and the fresh air outside fills my lungs and brings me back to reality.
How could he be so cruel? I run down the stairs on the sidewalk. I have to get away from here. I wish I had never met him, I wish I had had a different roommate. I even wish I had never come to WCU.
“Tessa!” I hear and I turn around, convinced I am imagining it until I see Hardin running after me.
Chapter sixty
I have never been very athletic, but my adrenaline is in full effect and I push my legs to go faster. I reach the end of the street, but begin to tire. Where the hell am I going to go? I don’t remember the path that I walked back to my dorm last time, and I stupidly left my phone in my room. To prove a point. About my independence from Hardin. Hardin, who’s chasing me and yelling, “Tessa, stop!”
And I do stop. I stop dead in my tracks. Why am I even running from him? He needs to explain why he keeps playing games with me.
“What did Zed say to you?”
What? When I turn around to face him, he is only a few feet away and has a shocked expression; he didn’t actually expect I would stop.
“What, Hardin! What could you possibly want from me?” I scream. My heart is pounding from running, and from his breaking it.
“I . . .” He seems to be at a loss for words for once. “Did Zed say something to you?”
“No . . . why would he?” I take another step forward so I am face-to-face with him, my anger rolling off me in waves.
“I’m sorry, okay?” he says quietly. He looks into my eyes and reaches his hand out to take mine, but I swat it away. He ignores my question about Zed but I am too mad to care.
“You’re sorry? You’re sorry?” I repeat, my voice coming out in a laugh.
“Yeah, I am.”
“Go to hell, Hardin.” I begin to walk away, but he grabs my arm again. My anger boils over and my hand flies up and smacks him, hard. I am as surprised by my own violence as he is, and I almost want to apologize for hitting him, but the pain he has caused me is so much more than a cuff on the cheek.
His hand moves to his face, slowly rubbing over the red skin of his cheek. He looks at me, anger and confusion stirring behind his eyes.
“What the hell is your problem? You were the one kissing Zed!” he yells. A car passes and the driver stares but I ignore him. I don’t care about causing a scene right now.
“You’re not seriously trying to blame me! You lied to me and played me like a fool, Hardin! Just when I thought I could trust you, you humiliate me! If you wanted to be with Molly, why not just tell me to leave you alone? No, instead, you feed me that bullshit about wanting more and beg me to stay the night with you just so you can use me! What was the point—what did you get out of it—oh, besides a blow job?” I scream. The word tastes odd coming out of my mouth.
“What? You think that’s what I am doing? You think I’m using you?” he shouts.
“No, that’s not what I think, Hardin—that’s what I know. But guess what? I’m done, I am so beyond done. I will change dorms if I have to so I don’t have to see you again!” I say, and mean it. I don’t need any of these people making my life worse.
“You’re overreacting,” he says flatly, and it takes everything in me not to slap him again.
“I’m overreacting? You didn’t tell your friends about us—you didn’t tell me about this party, and then you left me standing in the parking lot like a dumbass while you left with Molly, of all people! Then I show up here to find Molly on your lap, and then you kiss her. Right in front of me, Hardin. I’d say my reaction is quite justified,” I say, my voice drawing to a whisper at the end, exhausted. I wipe fresh tears from my face and blink up at the night sky.
“You kissed Zed right in front of me! And I didn’t tell you about the party because I don’t have to! You wouldn’t have wanted to come anyway—you would have been too busy studying or watching the damn paint dry,” he barks.
I look at his blurry form through my watery eyes and ask him simply, “So why even waste your time with me? Why even follow me out here, Hardin?” When he doesn’t say anything, I have my answer. “That’s what I thought. You thought you could come out here and say sorry and I would accept and stay a secret, your boring little hidden girlfriend. You’re wrong; you took my kindness for weakness and you were sadly mistaken.”