Page 13 of Accidental Dad’s Best Friend (Unintentionally Yours #7)

Izzy

“ W ho is Jaxon?”

Ethan asks the question for a second time but I am still frozen from the first. My brain attempts to web together a lie.

Old friend.

Ex boyfriend.

New neighbor.

Ex roommate’s…brother?

Honestly, everything I come up with sounds worse than the truth. And right now, with how often I see Ethan, how closely we are working together, the fact that the man is technically my landlord, I realize I can’t keep anything from him anymore.

He needs to know the truth.

At least…part of the truth.

“Well?” Ethan presses and I bite my lips looking away. “Don’t tell me it’s nobody, Izzy. That face tells me he’s not nobody.”

“He’s my son.” I say and the room falls silent. Like everything that was suspended in the air, all the unknown hits the floor in a crash and we are just standing here now.

“Your…son?”

I nod, tears stinging my eyes. I didn’t want him to know.

I don’t want things to be complicated. I’ve worked hard to create the bubble Jaxon and I live in and I can’t let it be compromised.

But I am also having a hard time holding a poker face right now.

I know it’s wrong to keep Jax from him. He has a right to know.

But I can’t predict how Ethan will react to knowing he has a kid.

Especially that he has a kid with me. It could ruin his reputation, his job…

everything. And I can’t protect Jaxon from scenarios I can’t predict.

I pad back over to the bed in last night’s clothes, my hair a mess and my chin quivering and I sit down. As I try to figure out where to start, or how much I want to say, Ethan tugs on a pair of sweatpants, which is good. Way less distracting.

“You have a son.” The words come out less like a question and more like a statement and I nod.

“I do.”

Ethan sits down next to me, staring forward. “How old?”

“He’s five.”

He nods again. “Pre-school?”

“Kindergarten,” I smile shakily. “It’s wild. I wasn’t ready for it but he was so excited to go to school. He even insisted on the all day classes instead of half day which nearly broke me.”

Ethan’s lips tip in a smile too. “Big man on campus.”

I laugh a little. “Pretty much. He’s very driven.”

“Like his mother.”

Like his father.

My heart slams against my ribs and it just hurts. Part of me wants to tell him but I can’t. I am too worried about what will happen if Ethan wants no part of it. Or if he meets Jax and then realizes he doesn't want to be involved. Or if my dad finds out.

I wipe my eyes. None of that can happen.

“The second room,” Ethan says and for a moment, I’m lost.

“I’m sorry?”

He looks at me with a smile. “That’s why you wanted the second room. And the townhouse in a family oriented neighborhood.”

“Yeah.”

“Well then I’m glad you are where you are.”

Me too. So much that I could kiss you right now.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He asks and my attention snaps over to him. “Why did you keep him a secret?”

“To be honest, I haven’t told most people. He was…I wasn’t trying to get pregnant.”

“And the father?”

The question makes my stomach bottom out. But the look in Ethan’s eyes tells me he truly isn’t doing the math.

“He doesn’t know.”

It’s not a lie. Jaxon’s father does not know he is Jaxon’s father. Even now.

Ethan nods. “Are you going to tell him?”

“I don’t know. I just want to protect Jax.”

“You didn’t have to keep it from me, though, Izzy. But I will tell you something.”

I wait, my breath stuck in my lungs as Ethan’s eyes hold mine.

“Now that I do know, I’m going to protect both of you.”

With that, I swallow hard as the secret burns a hole in my tongue.

The bell rings at Cherry Ridge Elementary and I wait with a group of other moms for Jaxon and the other kinder aged kids to be released across the playground.

I was lucky enough last night to find a sitter for him, a friend I used to work with at Slay who was the only person I ever connected with.

Kira was an editor and while she doesn’t have kids, she has a litter of nieces and nephews.

She agreed to watch him as soon as I texted her about having a date, though she wasn’t happy that I wouldn’t tell her who I was going out with.

I couldn’t though. My time with Ethan must remain a secret.

I’m starting to think my whole life is tangled with secrets.

“Izzy?” A somewhat familiar voice calls my name and I turn around and scan the faces of moms looking for someone familiar. I stop when I see the black wavy hair and huge smiling eyes.

“Rosilyn.” I smile, thanking God I remembered her name.

“Yes! I didn’t know you had kids here.”

“I do,” I walk over to stand next to her. “A son.”

“Same! My Luca is in kinder.”

“So is Jaxon.”

Rosilyn’s face lights up another sixty watts. “Well this is amazing! I bet they’re already friends which makes this even more fateful for us. Have you settled in yet? Found all the good places to shop and eat?”

“I’ve done a little exploring. When I’m not working. I found a good coffee spot, at least.”

“The place right down the street? Yes! I believe I’ve seen you there. With a man if I remember right.”

My heart stops beating and I fight to control my expression.

“Oh don’t be modest, Izzy. He looks like a very nice man. A very nice looking older gentleman, yes?”

“That’s my boss.” I spit the words out so fast they practically spitball her in the face.

“Your boss. Goodness, with the way you two were chatting back and forth I would have suspected more.”

I can feel the heat rising to my face but I force it away. “Not at all. He’s just my boss.”

Rosilyn studies me with a smile I can’t read for about five seconds before going on. “Well that’s lovely.”

As Jax and I make our way back home, he tells me all about his day. “I wanted to sit at the blue table because Emmie is at the blue table.”

“Oh. Do you like Emmie?”

“She brings an extra fruit snack every day so I can have it.”

I feign a look of shock. “You’ve been munching on fruit snacks every day?”

“It’s just a small snack, mom. They’re not bad for you. They’re fruit.”

I chuckle at that. Honestly, I am just happy he’s made friends so fast. I was worried that moving him this suddenly would be a problem but so far, I am really liking this school.

My stomach dips and my mouth turns down a little as I make the realization that we might not be here long. And this is definitely a school you have to be zoned into.

So if I have to move to the ghetto after my contract with Ethan expires, Jax won’t be going to this school anymore…

I decide I am not going to think about that now.

Half the reason I took this job was because I believe it could get me another high paying job in the industry.

I like to think that one bad job and an unfortunate connection to Liam Sloane hasn’t blemished my reputation as a writer forever. One day at a time.

“Do you think she likes you?” I ask, taking Jax’s hand. He’s still little enough that he is willing to hold my hand in public and I love it. I know we are creeping on the deadline for that and I’m just not ready. A lot of people wish away the young years. I never want them to be over.

Life is too complicated to wish away the innocent years.

“Maybe. She also gave me her scrunchy which I think girls do when they like you.”

“Really? How do you know that?” I ask.

“Because Sam gave her scrunchy to Hayden and everyone says that means she likes him and they’re basically dating now.”

“Dating?!” I let out. “So you have a girlfriend?”

Jax tugs away from my hand so he can pick a dandelion out of the sidewalk crack. “Maybe. But I’m not ready to get married.”

I let out a mock sigh. “Phew. Well that’s a relief. I don’t have anything to wear to a wedding.”

Jax looks up at me and laughs before handing me the dandelion.

When we get home, I press it into a book, a copy of Gone With the Wind I have read three times.

I want to save it forever, just like the memory of today’s walk.

I’ve learned in the past six years that moments like this are all that matter.

With that said, I realize I’m not being careful enough.

Rosilyn seems like a sweet enough person but she still recognized me at the coffee shop with Ethan.

And she realized that he is a bit older than me and also that there was chemistry.

While I waved it off, I can’t help but wonder if the flirting and the banter was there.

If she noticed, other people could have noticed.

And people in close knit places like this like to talk.

If I want to keep Jax safe, that is the last thing I need.

This is business and nothing more.

No one can know that I am working against my dad, no one can know that I am working with Ethan.

And Ethan can’t find out that Jax is his son.

It’s a big angry circle of secrets and if any of them get out to the wrong people, everything I am working towards will come crashing down.

I have to be able to raise him, on my own, in a good home with a good school and no one threatening to take anything from us.

And that means no more flirting. No dinners that aren’t about work.

No coffee shop knee bumping and eye contact that lasts too long.

No matter how incredible that eye contact is.

And no more nightcaps that end in multiple orgasms.

As I set Jax’s macaroni and cheese with little smokies on the table and turn on Wheel of Fortune (he loves game shows) I remind myself why I’m here.

It’s not a man that I have crushed on for years, having unrealistic thoughts that I shouldn’t entertain.

It’s me and my career and it’s Jax getting to stay at the school where the girls give him scrunchies and make him smile.

Whatever romantic notions I have about Ethan are not more important than that.