Page 18 of A Token of Blood and Betrayal (Kennedy Rain #4)

A rumble from Blake pulled my attention to him, and realization punched me in the gut.

My emotions were escalating the violence inside him.

His eyes were a killing gold. Veins circled his bare arms like snakes, and the tendons in his neck were tight and protruding.

The muscles in his shoulders and chest, his abs and lower, quivered with restraint.

He was on the verge of shifting. His wolf demanded control.

I hadn’t seen him struggle like this since the mountainside.

If Blake lost this fight, his humanity would be eclipsed by his lust for violence.

This time, it wouldn’t be caused by a wolfsbane spell. It would be caused by me.

Jared was right. I needed to calm down.

I released my anger and stepped toward the seething werewolf. “Blake.”

“He’s not in control.” Nora’s words were cold but steady. At least she had herself in control. So did the watching vampires. They would only attack if Blake attacked first.

I focused on my breathing as I moved closer, focused on calming my heart rate and connecting with him.

“Kennedy,” Jared warned behind me.

“I’ve got him.” I took another step, this time angled so that I stood slightly in front of Nora. Both she and Blake growled. Recognition that I existed. Yay.

I drew in another slow breath, wished it were more calming. Then, just like Blake had at Nora’s wedding and I had last week on the mountainside, I held out my hand and waited.

Blake’s wolf-gold eyes remained locked on Nora, but something in him changed. He became aware of my presence.

Another small step sideways. This time, he had no choice except to focus on me.

“Kennedy.” My name came out deep and guttural.

Got him. “Yes?”

The question in my single-word response invited interaction. It invited logical thought. And when I finally had his attention, the reality of the situation, of how close he’d come to surrendering to the wolf, hit him so hard he visibly flinched.

“Hey,” I said with a small smile. The amount of gold rimming his eyes didn’t lessen; it softened. He was caging his wolf, becoming the man I knew again, so I started to lower my outstretched hand.

He caught it first and pulled me in close.

The move, the warmth of his bare skin, and the intensity in his gaze as he looked down at me and I looked up at him…

It all coalesced into a launch of butterflies in my stomach, butterflies that glowed with beauty and passion and a forbidden connection I didn’t know how to resist.

My gaze found his mouth.

Nora’s derisive laugh kept our lips from connecting. “Of course your wolf would U-turn from violence to sex. Don’t be an idiot, Blake. Think with your brain.”

The gold in his eyes sharpened. I wanted to snap at Nora, to tell her to stop being a condescending princess. I’d just stopped her and Blake from doing something they’d both regret.

Blake’s hands tightened on my waist.

Then they loosened. At that exact moment, I realized Nora hadn’t spoken out of cruelty.

She was covering for Blake. For us. Because her father would kill him if we had a relationship.

Other alphas and vampires would try to as well because a Rain couldn’t show favoritism to any paranorm.

The Rains must be fair. They must be impartial. Equality was paramount.

Unless you were looking at equality within a species. Then it was thou shalt bow to the whims of the powerful.

My bitterness caused me to remain where I was, and Blake’s hands retightened on my waist. He leaned closer, drew in a deep breath, then tensed.

“You smell like him,” he murmured. “I want you to smell like—”

“Ahem!”

Blake and I both swiveled our heads toward the person who had so very loudly cleared their throat.

Marco held out a pair of neatly pressed black slacks. “For all our sakes.”

Right. Blake was still naked. Nora was too, although she was now pulling on a white silk robe.

“Thanks.” I took the pants from Marco and shoved them into Blake’s chest. That made his hands leave my waist, which was good because neither of us was thinking clearly.

I turned away when Blake began to dress, giving him a privacy he didn’t require.

But we were in public, and despite growing up around paranorms, American social standards were deeply ingrained in me.

My cheeks heated as if I’d accidentally walked in on someone changing.

It was a very delayed and unnecessary reaction.

I was still trying to find my equilibrium.

Since Blake wasn’t about to shift and kill us all, I took the time to survey the chamber.

More vampires must have shown up during the fight.

The amount of ash covering the floor was insane.

How did vampires clean up after this much killing?

A battery-powered vacuum? And did any of the ash piles contain Satine’s remains?

My gaze caught on Christian. He was focused on me. He was still rigid, still angry-looking. I gave him a tight smile meant to tell him I was relieved he was here and okay. His expression didn’t change though, and that made me feel like he was hiding something, and that made me worry he was hurt.

I scanned him head to toe as I approached.

I didn’t know how long he’d been there or if he and the two werewolves had to fight their way to the chamber.

His left elbow was bleeding where it had scraped against something, and his jeans were on the dirty side.

Other than those two minor things, he looked fine.

“Are you okay?” I asked. He didn’t respond. “What happened?”

Did his jaw just lock shut? His eyes were a clear, sharp blue, but his body language was off, almost as off as when I’d first met him. I’d thought he was a paranorm then. When he acted like this, all closed off and withdrawn, I forgave myself for the assumption.

Finally, he exhaled. His shoulders relaxed, and his expression turned less severe. “Satine escaped.”

Of course she couldn’t be dead. That would have been too easy. We would have to stay on alert. Watch each other’s backs. This was exhausting, always waiting for the next catastrophe to gut punch me.

“The vampires who sided with her are dead or gone too,” Christian continued. “So are the ones who didn’t choose an allegiance.”

“My vampires will take care of them,” Jared said.

Take care of them meant only one thing in the paranormal world.

“You’re killing vampires who choose neutrality.” My words sounded more like I was observing a stone sitting on grass than discussing the murder of a not small number of paranorms.

“It must be done,” Jared said.

“Of course it must,” I replied. “The vampires are guilty of the high crime of not falling to their knees at your feet.”

“Sarcasm is not necessary.” Jared’s dark gaze felt… intrusive and vaguely familiar. Months ago, I’d rescued him from Arcuro. He’d been half drained, and he’d bitten me outside The Rain. A connection formed between us. Fortunately, it faded over time.

This better fade too.

“Sarcasm is the only defense I have against this life.”

“God, Kennedy.” Nora’s voice cut through the air. “You brood worse than a vampire. The world isn’t out to get you. You’re alive. Jared controls the compound. This is a win.”

A raw anger flared hot inside my chest. “A year ago, my parents were alive. The number of times someone tried to kill me was zero. So was the number of times I’d been forced to kill. No one limited my choices or threatened my friends.”

Friends like Garion. Shit. How badly had I screwed up chasing Nora out of the Null?

Oblivious of my problems or just flat-out indifferent, Nora lifted her shoulders in a callous shrug. “Fine. Be weak.”

The words cut like the sharpest blade across my skin, stunning me first, then seeping through my defensive walls to circle around in my mind. I didn’t want to look too closely at Nora’s accusation, but it demanded to be seen, to be felt, to be reckoned with.

Nora thought I was weak. That couldn’t be true. Time and again, I put myself at risk to save others, to save her just an hour ago.

I tried so damn hard to be strong, but what if Nora was right?

I might be changing things, dismissing old traditions and creating a new normal, but was I also running from reality?

I’d run my senior year. I’d let Lehr and Arcuro make me small.

When they’d killed the unsanctioned, I allowed that to be the end of a story instead of a plot twist.

“This wasn’t a win,” Blake said, pulling me out of my spiraling thoughts. “Satine was overconfident. She’ll be back with more vampires. You’ve only increased the amount of danger you’re in. Both of you.”

Nora and I. He didn’t care about Jared’s safety—not unless it affected hers too—and Christian was just a human, not important enough to warrant the smallest consideration.

“Leave us,” Jared commanded. I tensed, expecting Blake’s aura to turn excessively violent again. It took a moment to realize Jared was speaking to the vampires, not to Blake.

I hadn’t exactly forgotten about them. They’d just been so silent and still that my exhausted mind had chosen to conserve energy and ignore them.

As one, they bowed their heads respectfully. Then, without a vocalized word, all except Marco filed out of the chamber. He stood an arm’s length away and held out what had to be a stupidly expensive glass water bottle. “I hope you know what you’re doing, kid.”

My mouth quirked into a smile. “Are you the compound’s logistics manager? You’re magicking clothes and drinks out of nowhere.”

He chuckled, then pointed toward a door near the farthest corner. “Cold storage.” He pointed a few degrees to the right. “Storage closet. You know, the things normal people have in their homes.”

I snorted. In truth, I hadn’t noticed either door before that moment. I’d been preoccupied with the people in the room, not its details or decor, although the now broken chaise was memorable.

“Good luck,” Marco said. The two words sounded more like Be careful. He gave my shoulder what I hoped was an encouraging pat and not an I’ll-never-see-you-again goodbye.

“Marco.”

Marco paused near the chamber’s exit, then turned to face the compound’s new master.

“We will be adjourning to my residence,” Jared said. “Ensure it is secure and that we will not be disturbed.”

Marco bowed his head and departed.

“Satine is my responsibility,” Jared said once all the vampires were gone. “As are Nora and Kennedy.”

“You put their lives at risk.” Blake hadn’t moved, but his stance became more predatory somehow.

“They should not have come.” Jared’s gaze landed on Nora. She was unimpressed with his accusatory glare. And she was too independent to allow anyone to treat her like a snowflake.

Her robe shimmered when she crossed her arms. “I made my decision.”

I wouldn’t call her sprint out of the door a decision exactly, but her point was valid.

“I make my own decisions too,” I said.

Jared’s dark eyes shifted to me. “You were nonresponsive.”

“It doesn’t matter.” My voice was firm, my gaze steady. He needed to understand he couldn’t control everything. He couldn’t control me.

“Give me clearance to go up,” Christian said. His words were so abrupt and out of context it took a while for them to make sense.

“You’re leaving?” I asked.

“I’m not needed here.” His shoulders slumped more than usual, and his eyes looked less alert, less engaged.

He was tired. It made sense. Like me, he’d only had a handful of restful nights lately.

But I wanted him to stay. I needed someone on my side, and he was the only other person here who’d object to killing being the default course of action instead of the last resort.

“Wrong.” Nora dropped the single syllable like a gavel in a judgment chamber. “We’re discussing Kennedy’s dilemma. Therefore, you’re coming with us.”

“I don’t see a reason to hold the man prisoner,” Blake said.

“He’s involved in this as much as we all are.” Her gaze sharpened on Christian. “Kennedy needs you here.”

Despite thinking the same thing just moments ago, I bristled. Yes, he knew about Garion and my bargain, but it wasn’t fair to ask him to stay. “You don’t have to—”

“I don’t know anything about fey.”

“Fey?” Blake’s gaze whipped to me. “You have your memory back?”

That sounded like an accusation. “Yeah—”

“When?” he demanded.

“Recently.” I matched his tone. I wasn’t obligated to tell Blake anything. But I would have. Probably. He was familiar with at least one fey, Cyrielle, and I’d bet he knew others.

“You told them and not me.”

“I regained my memory last night.” I tried to keep the irritation from my voice.

“I was with you last night.”

Heat spiraled through my stomach, which was ridiculous considering we hadn’t done anything.

But his words could be so easily misinterpreted, and I felt the scrutiny in the room.

“You were carrying an unconscious vampire over your shoulder.” A heartbeat later, I realized that might not have been the smartest thing to say.

I looked at Jared. “Deagan’s fine and resting. ”

Jared’s expression didn’t change. “We will not discuss this here. Come.”

“Will your vampires be a problem?” Christian asked. The question was just a formality. He intended to leave.

Jared paused. He and Christian had an odd acquaintance.

I wasn’t sure exactly when they’d met, but Christian had been the one to show Jared The Rain’s secret corridors.

In exchange, Jared promised to kill Melissa’s master.

That hadn’t happened yet, and Christian’s patience was beginning to turn into frustration.

Despite that, the two men seemed to respect one another.

Jared could clear Christian’s path to the surface with a single mental command.

That’s not the command Jared gave though.

“You will remain.” The walls of the chamber seemed to amplify Jared’s declaration, like the compound itself bolstered his words with power and intensity. The vampires who hadn’t fled or been killed had acknowledged Jared as their master. I think the stronghold had just done the same.