Page 2

Levi

I can hear her showering and knowing she is over there naked with her hands all over her beautiful body… it’s too much. My cock is painfully hard, and there is no willing it to go down this time. I shame myself as I start stroking my cock, imagining myself going into her shower and fucking her senseless. I steer clear of relationships, and I have had no desire to consider them… until her. Until she forced her way into my life and rooted herself inside my brain. I am drawn to her in a way I haven’t experienced since… No. I won’t compare her. That’s not fair.

Let’s be honest, though. Arden is one of a kind; she is smart, strong, and feral . God, she is such a fucking brat, and I am constantly wanting to put her ass over my knee. When I touch her and hear how her breath catches… Fuck . I know she wants it too. I won’t reject it, but I won’t feel it out either. If it’s meant to happen, it’ll happen.

I place my hand on the wall and stroke myself faster. I listen to her hum and sigh quietly to herself, but it’s her fucking voice that sends me straight to the edge. “Why do you have showers here?” Arden asks.

“Uhm… For this reason. In case anyone needs a shower. Search and rescue can get dirty,” I choke out, but I don’t stop. The barbells of my piercings are rubbing against my palm, and it makes my body jerk. Fuck, what I wouldn’t give to have this girl on her knees so I can fuck her throat. Something about making her nearly throw up from my brutality has my balls tightening. Jesus, I bet she is incredible with her mouth. The waves break, and my orgasm finally washes over me, and I come. My ears are ringing, and it takes me a second to force the images of her sucking my cock out of my mind before I can function.

“You okay?”

“Yeah. Why?”

“I just thought I heard… Never mind. I’m just about done,” she says. I say nothing because I know she heard me moan. I tried not to, but imagining her on my cock… Fuck, that’s amazing.

I grab my towel from outside the shower after shutting the water off and wrap it around my waist. I step out and immediately realize I should have waited. I run directly into Arden. She nearly falls over herself as she spins around to face me. She looks absolutely stunned, but that fades as her eyes drag down my body, and that feral little brat brings out something lustful.

“What happened?” she asks softly as her fingers lightly trace a scar on my abdomen.

“I was shot,” I say. “It’s what made me go from being an active Marine to this.”

“Damn. I’m sorry,” she frowns. “But, I’m kinda not surprised you were a Marine.”

“Oh?”

“It’s the hair,” she grins. “I need to get dressed. You look far too tempting right now for me to not try and persuade you to touch me.”

“It wouldn’t take much convincing,” I say honestly before stepping out of the shower area so I can grab my clothes and get dressed. When I’m done, I leave and go to my office.

I brought in another desk so she can work in here. Partly because I’m a selfish bastard and I want her close, but also because it makes the most sense that she doesn’t have to come find me anytime she needs something.

After a few minutes, Arden joins me with damp hair. She’s only wearing tight jeans and a simple T-shirt, but damn, she can make anything look sexy. I’m leading with my dick right now, and I’m trying to not lead that inside of her. She wants to learn, not get fucked over my desk like I am some kind of beast. She would sound so amazing laid out on my desk with my face buried in her cunt. The way I could make that woman sing for me…

“So…” she starts to ask.

“Don’t ask unless you are prepared for my answer,” I say simply as I flip through paperwork.

“Right… I mean… Fuck it… Did you moan? Because it sounded like a moan. Not that I have heard a lot of men moaning, but enough to know that you were…”

“That I was what?” I ask when she stops talking.

“You were jerking off,” she says bluntly.

“Do you really want to have this conversation, Arden?” I ask, sitting back to look at her. I can see her contemplating. I simply look back at my computer and continue clicking through my email.

“Why?” she asks. I don’t have an answer for her because why would I jerk off with her five feet away? Why have I ever jerked off with her on my mind? How am I supposed to tell her that I crave to be around her? I’m afraid of taking a step too close and falling headfirst in love with her. I don’t have the willpower to pull away because I am addicted to the way she smiles at me. It’s been so long since someone has lit up my world, but she does. She shines bright and makes me believe that there is life after loss.

“What do you mean?” I ask, not looking up at her.

“Why did you do that?”

“Do what?” I ask.

“Really? Why did you do that?”

“Do what?” I ask again.

“Goddamn it, Levi,” she snaps. I smirk at my computer and ignore her, which only pisses her off more. “What kind of fucking game are you playing?”

“What do you mean?” I ask.

“Will you fucking look at me?” she asks. I sigh and sit back in my chair. She deserves an explanation and to feel safe, but I don’t know how to explain that despite the desperate urge to fuck her unconscious every time she gets an attitude or acts like a brat, I would never force her. “Why would you do that?”

“Why not?” I ask. That was a dumbass response. Why not? Because it’s inappropriate.

“You keep me at arm’s length and never let me close to you, but you you'll jerk off in the shower next to me?” she says. “Six fucking months, Levi. I see you every fucking day and I don’t even know your favorite color.”

“Yellow,” I say.

“What?” she asks. “ Yellow? ”

“It was my daughter’s favorite color,” I say. I am surprised I even mention Melody, but I see rage flash in her eyes and I realize that she doesn’t know.

“What?” she yells at me. “You have a child? Do you even give a shit about me? I know nothing about you. You are grumpy as fuck all the time, and apparently you don’t fucking trust—”

I see the anxiety and I recognize the spiral. I stand and tears roll down her cheeks. “Arden,” I say. “Slow down.”

“Why am I here?” she asks. “Why am I here if you don’t even trust me enough to tell me you have a child? Or are you one of those shit parents who just wants the title of dad?”

I take her face between my hands, and she is fighting back sobs. “She’s dead, Arden,” I say. Arden stops and her eyes go wide.

“I’m so sorry. I didn’t…” she starts to apologize.

“Her name was Melody. She would have been fourteen years old, but she died when she was five,” I explain. “I had a wife named Charlotte, and she’s dead, too. I don’t talk about them because it hurts. I was there and I couldn’t save them. I trust you, but I don’t trust that I won’t immediately go to a bar and drink the memory of my wife and daughter being raped and killed in front of me away.”

“I’m so sorry,” she says tearfully. “I didn’t know. I’m so…”

I cut her off by hugging her and her body shakes. Right now, I am realizing that someone has hurt her. This isn’t just heartbreak, this is a memory being triggered. Does Wilder know someone has broken Arden?

“Shhh,” I say. “Breathe. It’s okay.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t know why…” I hold her face again and wipe away her tears. “I’m not trying to be selfish. I didn’t mean to…”

“Someone has hurt you before,” I say. She is reluctant, but nods. “We all have trauma, pretty girl. We just carry it differently.”

“You were there?” I ask. “You don’t have to answer.”

“Yeah,” I say. “Charlotte’s ex stalked her. He had been silent for a long time. He thought I was out of the country still, so he broke in. I was still healing from the gunshot wound, so I was on pain medicine. By the time I woke up, I was tied up. I watched as he violently raped both of them for… hours. Eventually, he shot them and then himself.”

“That’s awful,” she sniffs. “I’m so sorry.”

“Arden, honey. You are the first person I have made space for in my life since that day. It feels natural to be close to you… to touch you… But I have no idea what I am doing anymore. I don’t do relationships, I do one-night stands and never talk to them again. But you… You are addictive,” he says. “Yes, I moaned. I was doing exactly what you think I was doing. I don’t know why, but I did. I would never hurt you and I’m sorry that I was inappropriate. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“I’m not upset,” she says. “I just… You are a confusing man, Levi. You have no problem touching me, but never too much. I see the way you look at me, but you never let me get close.”

“If I let you get close, I’ll never be able to let you go, Arden. I’m not strong enough to let you go,” I say.

“Do you want me here?”

“Absolutely,” I say. “I think you are brilliant and capable of so much. I enjoy your company, and I’d like to think you enjoy mine.”

“I do,” she says. “Why did you throw that guy’s phone?”

“He was taking pictures of your ass, and it pissed me off,” I say simply. I won’t mention the vile comments he was making. I’ll be too tempted to go find the fucker.

“Oh,” she says. “I don’t know what to say now.”

“I will try my best to be appropriate,” I say. “I want to offer for you to come to my house to train because I have a home gym, but I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“You don’t make me feel uncomfortable,” she laughs. “I mean… you do, but not in a bad way.”

“What do you mean?” I ask.

“I mean… When you touch my lower belly like that… I’m just a girl with a filthy mind who is attracted to a grumpy man who could break my ass in half.”

I laugh heartily, and she grins. “How about this? Let’s start being open about things and just see where it goes. No forcing things either way, we just continue on.”

“And you want me in your house?” she asks.

“Pretty girl, I want you in my bed and on any other surface I can sit your cute little ass on,” I say bluntly. “Yes, I’d feel better with you not being in that gym full of perverts. You picked the sleaziest gym in the city.”

“Where do you live?” she asks.

“On Franklin Street, a few miles from here. Why?”

“I live like forty-five minutes away with my parents,” she says. “Just thinking about how early I’d have to get up.”

“Just an idea. At a minimum, I’d like you to move gyms,” I say. “You live with your parents?”

“Yeah. Yeah,” she sighs. “I know. It’s weird and slobbish. I just… I used to live by myself, but I couldn’t do it.”

“Something happened?” I ask, and she nods. “I won’t push, but know that I am not judging.”

“Wilder offered for me to live with them, but I just can’t,” she says. I can tell she wants to say more but doesn’t.

“We can try it out and just see how you like the drive, or we can pick something else. I just want you to be comfortable.”

“That place creeps me out,” she admits. “I would never go there without you.”

“Good,” I say. “Let’s get your paperwork settled. While you fill that out, I will go through my email and see if there are any case requests that are more pressing than the others.”

“Okay,” she says with a smile.