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The robin had fluffed up his feathers and was cleaning himself thoroughly, spreading his wings, lifting his tail, shaking his head. His little inflated body was twice its usual size, and almost perfectly round. He was so beautiful. Carys smiled to herself. Robins had always been her favorite birds. She would have liked nothing more than to scoop him up in her palm and cradle his softness in her palms. He would weigh nothing, and be as fragile as newly fallen snow.

Was everything that was good in life as fleeting and delicate? Love certainly seemed to be. She and her husband had loved one another fiercely, and yet there was nothing left of it now. The only proof there had ever been a man called Dewi ab Anarawd lived in her memory, where no one could see it.

The bird shook himself one last time and let out a contented chirp. She tilted her head, unable to detach her gaze from him.

“Now, what has you so fascinated, I wonder?”

Carys let out a little gasp when the question reached her from behind. James. She had still not accustomed herself to him being back—or that she could understand him. All those months ago she had thought his way of talking particularly gruff. She could see now that it was in fact simply due to his deep voice.

“The bird, here, on the?—”

Before she could finish the sentence, the robin had flown away. Carys followed him with her gaze for as long as she could. Where was he going? To the forest yonder or farther away? Did he mean to reach the sea? Lucky him.

“The robin that was here you mean?” James asked, drawing to her side.

“Yes.” She was delighted by the piece of information. She had not known the English name for the bird, and loved that it was the same as it was Welsh. Robin goch . Red robin. It would be one less word to remember. “I love robins.”

“Why?”

He sounded nonplussed that anyone could express such a sentiment, and perhaps it was foolish to have a favorite bird. Because when she wanted to explain what the attraction was she discovered that she had no idea why that was exactly. She had always liked them, ever since she was a child and she’d not thought she would ever have to justify her decision to anyone.

“I don’t know.” What could she say? “They are so funny, don’t you think?. Round and lovely.”

“I suppose so.” He didn’t sound convinced but eager not to contradict her. It made her smile.

James watched Carys look back in the direction where the little robin had flown. There was a look of wonder on her face, as if she had just seen an angel. It puzzled him. How could the sight of a bird have sent her into such a reverie? How many robins, wrens or sparrows had he seen in his life, without ever thinking anything of it? Her capacity to find beauty and joy in the simplest things amazed him. Only the day before he had seen her eyes light up when Silver had run up to her. Even though he imagined she saw the dog every day of her life, you could have sworn she’d been reunited with a long-lost friend. Everything she did was done with the same enthusiasm. She always ate with relish, laughed as if she had no care in the world, walked as if she were heading for a place where untold delights awaited her.

Next to her he felt oddly constrained, dull.

Odd, because as a young man, he had never thought of himself in that way. True, he had never been the most outspoken of men, but then Joanne had changed him, for the better. During their marriage, he’d been able to fight his natural tendency to be withdrawn. Since her death, he had kept himself to himself, and not worried about how he appeared to others. But perhaps now that he’d lost what little passion she’d managed to spark in him he had become a hollow husk of a man.

It was not a pleasing thought.

“I’ve never seen the sea,” Carys said, bringing him back to the present. “Dewi and I said we would go together but we never did.”

“Dewi?”

She flushed, looking caught out. It was not the first time he’d heard her express her inner feelings out loud. In fact, it was one of the many things he liked about her. She was never ashamed of what she thought, so much so that she allowed everyone to hear it.

“My late husband. He promised me he would take me there one day. We never made the effort to organize the outing, though, thinking we could go any time we wanted. And we could have. Only, we didn’t, and in the end, he died without having seen it. I wish it had been different, because it would have taken little effort to actually go.”

The confession, so simple, so heartfelt, moved him. He, too, had planned to do things with Joanne, things he had not been able to find the courage to do without her. His heart went to Carys because he understood exactly what she meant. These little things had a way of being swallowed by life’s hectic pace. You promised yourself to do something, but because it was unimportant or seemed easy to organize, you put them to one side, for a moment when you had nothing better to do.

And then one day, before you knew it, it was too late.

“The sea is not so far from here,” he told her, barely resisting the urge to take her hand in his. “Tomorrow, I’ll take you there.”

Tomorrow. There would be no delay, no excuses, no chance to refuse. Suddenly nothing seemed more important that this little thing. Because it was with Carys.

When she looked up at him, her blue eyes were sparkling, just like the surface of the sea when the sun reflected over it. His breath caught in his chest. Beautiful.

“Would you really? Oh, I would love that.”

Yes, he would take her there. Nothing would stop him, if it was going to give her such pleasure. He would take her there and watch the wonder on her face.

“I’ll come to find you tomorrow. Be ready at dawn.”

“There it is, between the trees.”

Carys frowned and peered into the distance. “Are you certain this is it?”

“I am.” James laughed at her obvious discomfiture. “Let me guess. You expected something more spectacular.”

There was no denying it. All she could see was a gray band floating ahead of them, barely distinguishable from the horizon, framed by slightly disheveled trees. This first glimpse was underwhelming to say the least. This was the sea? She had spent so long dreaming about this moment that she could not help feeling somewhat deflated. Perhaps she could have spared herself the trouble of coming all this way.

“Wait,” James said, sensing her disappointment. “Give it a second chance. Sometimes first impressions are misleading. We are still some distance away but you might think differently once you get nearer and see it for what it really is.”

“Are you still talking about the sea?” she muttered.

He cocked his head and gave her a blinding smile, the likes of which she had never thought to see on his face. It transformed him. She didn’t have time to bask in it, however, because then he asked, “Of course. What else would I be talking about?”

Go drapia ! She’d spoken aloud again. Would she never get rid of this silly habit of hers? Since he’d heard her, she decided to brazen it out. “I thought perhaps you would be talking about yourself?”

“Me?” He arched a brow in surprise.

“Well, you are rather gruff on first acquaintance, wouldn’t you say? Or even on second or third.”

“I don’t know, I … Am I?”

He sounded so genuinely put out that she regretted the tease. He hadn’t been gruff toward her, exactly. Most of the impression might have been due to the fact that he looked so forbidding in black—and that they hadn’t been able to understand one another. Because now that she knew him, she saw that he was remarkably even-tempered for such a virile man.

“It wasn’t so bad,” she soothed. “I expect it was inevitable I should think you gruff when I didn’t understand what you were telling me.”

“No, it wasn’t inevitable. Words are one thing, attitude another. I hope I didn’t give you the impression I wanted to rip your head off.”

Rip her head off? She laughed out loud at the unlikely image. She doubted anything would rile James Mortimer so much as to make him lash out at someone. He simply didn’t seem to be the kind of man who would allow his temper to overrule him thus.

“Oh, no. Nothing so dramatic as that,” she assured him. He nodded, still looking less than pleased. Why had she thought to tease him? How had she not guessed a man as serious as he was wouldn’t respond well to it? “Shall we?” she asked, hoping to put an end to the moment. “I can’t wait to get a closer look at the sea.”

They walked on. When she had confessed not to be a skilled rider, James had made sure to saddle for her the mount she had used to come from Wales. She was an old mare with a placid disposition, nothing like the spirited stallion—boasting a shiny black coat, naturally—that he’d chosen for himself. Not having to worry about falling down allowed Carys to relax and focus on the landscape around them. And it was beautiful, a succession of rolling hills and gnarled old trees. The air was scented with the proximity of the sea, she guessed, and she inhaled the brine deeply. It certainly smelled different, sharper than what she was used to. After having followed a narrow track through the woods, they came to a bend—and there it was.

The mare stopped.

Carys gaped.

The sea sparkled.

James chuckled.

“Not so disappointed now, I see,” he drawled.

She didn’t turn to him when she answered on a breath. “No.”

How could she be? She had never seen anything more beautiful. Even though she had imagined this moment many times, the reality surpassed her imagination. Would she have been as struck had it not been a sunny day and the sea not sparkled so, she wondered?

Yes. Somehow, she was certain that even under leaden skies, the view would have taken her breath away.

“Come,” James said quietly. “We need to get closer. I know the best place to go.”

After a short ride down gentle slopes, they finally reached their destination. They hitched the horses to a cluster of trees that seemed made for that purpose and walked toward the edge of the water, which was coming and retreating rhythmically, creating a sort of foam as it did. Was it supposed to do that? Carys had never seen anything like it. One glance at James made it clear he was unconcerned. Perhaps everything was as it should be. Feeling somewhat ridiculous at her lack of knowledge, she edged closer.

“It’s nothing like the lake near the village,” she observed under her breath.

“No. I can imagine. It will be much bigger.”

“Yes. And rather daunting. Peaceful. Unfamiliar. Soothing.”

“All this?”

“All this. And more.”

He seemed delighted by her reaction, which puzzled her. What had she done save give her honest opinion? But now that she thought of it, he always seemed to enjoy watching her enjoy something. Perhaps because his own reactions were so subdued, he liked seeing someone experience things to the full? It would make sense. Well, if he enjoyed that, he had definitely come to the right person. Carys was incapable of keeping her reactions, be they good or bad, to herself. She wore her heart on her sleeve and she was not afraid to let her emotions show, especially delight. Expressing them out loud seemed to allow her to feel them with more intensity.

“Do you want to dip your feet in?” James suggested when she was about to ask if they could get even closer. “It would be a pity to have come all this way and not even enjoy the feel of the water against your skin, don’t you think?”

Yes, it would be.

James wanted Carys to make the most of the moment, not only for her sake, but for his also. He would derive even more pleasure from watching her than he would from feeling the cool water snake around his ankles. After all, it was nothing new to him. But he knew she would love it.

“Is it safe? I don’t know how to swim,” she admitted with a delicious blush.

“You won’t need to. The water is very shallow for several yards around here,” he explained, trying not to dwell on how that blush became her. It made it impossible to look anywhere else but at her beautiful face. “It’s perfectly safe.”

“Can you swim?”

“Yes. So there is nothing to fear, I’ll catch you if you slip.” He would even enjoy it. “I will come in the water with you, so you can hold on to my arm if you need to.”

That seemed to decide her. Without further ado, she sat down to remove her shoes and stockings. The gesture was so artless, it denoted such enthusiasm, he felt something tighten inside him. What that might be, he wasn’t sure but he suspected it might be joy. The simple joy of being with someone who enjoyed what life had to offer. After having been alone for so long, after having almost died, that was exactly what he needed.

But even if it hadn’t been, he could not have prevented himself from wanting to be with Carys. He’d been attracted to her from the start, and he was more attracted to her than ever, which was little wonder.

How could she appear so youthful with two grown daughters, he asked himself for the hundredth time? Her face was perfection, her hair the most extraordinary color. He could tell it had been a rich auburn when she was younger. But the silver strands time had woven through it, instead of being spread throughout, as it was in other people, himself included, were focused in two wide streaks either side of her head. They followed the shell of her ear, starting at her temple, and running all the way to the end of the long locks, which hung in soft waves over her shoulders. The effect was striking, unlike anything he had ever seen.

Was it enough to explain the fascination she exerted over him? No. But combined with her smile, the sparkle in her eyes, her boundless enthusiasm and the lilting accent giving her every declaration an entrancing quality, it was more than enough.

Without ceremony, she bunched her skirts in one hand and walked toward the lapping waves. As spring was still a few weeks away, he knew the water would be cold. The sea was also rather agitated that morning, but he didn’t mention anything, since it was safe, as he’d said. There was no point in worrying her for nothing.

“Are you not waiting for me then?” he asked, as he started to remove his boots.

“No. You’re taking forever, and I’m impa—” She let out a little shriek when the first wave hit her toes.

“Cold?” he asked, amused.

“Yes. And tickly,” she replied, retreating hastily. As she did so, she wavered, unused to the sensation of having sand being sucked from under her feet. Fortunately, he had reached her by then and he steadied her with an arm about the waist.

“Here. I told you I would not let you fall.”

“ Diolch .” She automatically thanked him in Welsh.

“What should I answer to this, I wonder?” he asked, leaning in to speak in her ear.

“ A chroeso. ”

Her voice was barely above a whisper. He did his best to repeat the words as faithfully as he could and was rewarded with a blinding smile. “ Da iawn ! Well done.”

“My first words in Welsh,” James confided. Only for her would he have attempted such a thing. He’d heard enough of the language to see it would not be easily mastered.

“Thank you, I had guessed as much.” There was mirth in her voice but no mockery. “It seems we have both experienced something new today.”

“It would appear so. Shall we carry on?”

“Yes. I’m not one for giving up so easily.”

No. He didn’t think she would be.

Hand in hand, they walked back to the edge of the water and only stopped when their feet were completely covered by the churning sea. It was as cold as he had feared, but not for all the gold in the world would he have wished himself anywhere else.

“Is it always thus?” Carys asked, lifting her head to him. “Does the water always go back and forth in that manner, I mean?”

She looked cautious, as if fearing he would think her silly for not knowing but eager to have an answer nonetheless. Of course, if she had never seen the sea before, she would be surprised by the motion. How had he not thought?

He nodded. “Yes. It never stops, never for a moment. Not only that, but it expands. It is low tide now, but do you see those rocks next to where we tethered the horses? The water will slowly creep up to them over the course of the afternoon. Then it will start retreating back to the place it is now, and the same thing will happen again at night. It does this twice a day, every day.”

“That’s incredible.”

“Yes. It’s a movement that’s as old as time.”

Back and forth. Retreating then plunging in again. Suddenly the words made him think of another such movement that had been part of people’s lives since the dawn of humanity. How long since he had experienced the joy of being one with a woman, of moving inside her and getting lost in the moment? Too long. But, as much as he missed it, he knew why he didn’t indulge in the pleasure of it. It was not just that few women piqued his interest, though that was certainly one reason. But the act was not without consequence. Children were created during such joinings, and then their parents had to watch as they died.

James had been through that awful pain four times already. Once would have been once too many, four was just plain cruelty. He could not bear the idea of seeing a child of his loins die ever again. Much better to keep his urges in check. And mercifully, there were other ways to get—and give pleasure.

“I want to go a bit further.”

“Yes.”

So did he. But he didn’t think they were talking about the same thing.

Carys could not help a shriek when a wave, more forceful than the others, crashed against her legs, splashing her all the way to her knees. Not only was the sea going back and forth, but it was also unpredictable. It seemed that some waves were stronger than others, and she’d been caught out.

“Will you look at that!” She giggled, gesturing at her dress. “I’m all wet!”

James gave her an odd look, one that was too intense by far, considering what they were discussing.

“You are paddling in the sea, that will be why,” he said before she could make sense of it. “Doing certain things will make you wet, there’s no avoiding it. It’s not always a bad thing, though.”

Everything within her tightened, or loosened, she wasn’t quite sure which. Was he … had he just alluded to?—

Another wave crashed against her legs. This time she didn’t do anything to try and avoid it, she didn’t shriek. In fact she barely noticed it, so lost was she trying to puzzle out James’ words and containing the wild beating of her heart.

After a long while, he cleared his throat. “The tide’s coming in, that’s why the waves are coming with more force. I’d better get you away from here,” he said softly. “Or you’ll end up completely drenched.”

She couldn’t nod; she couldn’t speak. All she knew was that she was drenched already, only not in the way he meant. Dear God, what had just happened? Nothing. And yet she felt as breathless as if James had just kissed her senseless.

They retrieved their shoes in silence and made their way back to the blanket he’d spread on the sand earlier.

Carys sat down and lifted her head up to the sun while her dress and feet dried, trying to regain her composure. The peaceful setting helped. The bay curved gently on either side of them, and she could distinguish various shades of green, gray and blue in the water, depending on how the sunlight hit the surface. No one was around, and it looked as if the place had been created for them, like the perfect cocoon.

“How long were you married?”