Page 16 of A Rebel’s Shot (Alaskan Rebels #4)

SIXTEEN

Tiikaan dramatically moaned in delight around the bite of sandwich, hoping to get a reaction from Merritt.

Yet Merritt stabbed her fork into her salad and didn’t even look at him. Thank goodness the restaurant in the hotel wasn’t that busy. No one to see her practically ignore his existence.

With her shoulders pulled back and the rod rammed where the sun didn’t shine, she was even worse than their first meeting. She’d been distant since that phone call in her office two days before, not talking to him and going home the minute they touched down in Barrow.

He didn’t get it.

One minute he was sure she was going to kiss him, and the next she’d huddled into that shell of icy indifference she’d been hiding in when they’d first met.

He hated it.

He wanted to crack it open and pull her out. Bring that vibrancy and determination back, which was a joke since he really didn’t know her. Not after only two weeks and her ping-ponging between two versions of herself.

Did she even realize she did it? Which version of Merritt was the truth, the caring, want to save the world and everyone in it one or the frosty CEO who didn’t need anyone and could cut a person down with a few sharp words?

He’d finally gotten her to come back out to dinner with him. If he could just get her to open up again, then maybe he wouldn’t feel like she was disappearing, transforming before his very eyes into someone he knew beyond a doubt that she wasn’t.

She put down her fork across her half-eaten dinner and pushed it to the edge of the table. He motioned to the server for the check.

He needed to get her somewhere they could talk, that night, before they left for Fairbanks in the morning. If he could melt some of her aloofness, then maybe while they were gone from her family and the mine, he could break the rest of the way through.

He may just be a Podunk nobody who’d rather spend time outdoors than with people, but Merritt had weaseled her way under his skin. He didn’t think he wanted to root her out.

He stood and pulled three twenties from his wallet, handing them to the server as she walked up. Merritt jolted, her eyes darting to him as if just realizing he was there.

She recovered quickly, her surprise morphing to a blank mask with one heave of her chest. He clenched his teeth to keep his frustration in .

“Come on.” He tipped his head to the windows facing the beach and extended his hand to her. “Let’s go for a walk.”

She swallowed, then slid her hand in his. The soft brush of her fingers against his palm caused every hair on his arms to stand at attention like the one time he was stuck in the woods during an electrical storm.

When she stood, he threaded his fingers through hers and pulled her toward the exit. He couldn’t let her go, not yet. He took her not pulling away as a good sign.

When they stepped onto the sand, she pulled him to a stop. Her hand tightened in his, and her gaze darted up and down the beach. He stepped closer and squeezed her hand.

“Is it safe?” The anxiety in her voice crushed him.

He’d do everything within his power to keep her from danger. “Safe?”

“Polar bears.” She swallowed, her answer barely a whisper.

“We’ll keep our heads on a swivel, just like you do anytime you’re outdoors in Alaska.” He pulled up his shirt to reveal his shoulder holster and handgun. “And if we need it, which I doubt we will, I’ll make sure it doesn’t get anywhere near you.”

Her eyes widened, then narrowed. “You always have that on?”

“Never leave home without it.”

She shook her head. “That’s a huge violation of mine policy.”

“Good thing I’m not a mine employee.” He winked and pulled her to walk .

She rolled her eyes but allowed him to lead her to the beach. His lips twitched. Let the melting commence.

Only, now that he had her reacting, he didn’t know what to say. His mom’s ringtone chirped from his phone in his pocket. He wasn’t sure if the throbbing in his chest was relief or frustration at being interrupted.

He shot Merritt a smile and tapped on the speaker icon. “Hey, Mom.”

“Hey, sweetheart. How’s the top of the world?” Hearing his mom’s voice made his muscles relax.

“Well, I’m walking on the beach with a beautiful lady, so it can’t be all that bad.”

Merritt scoffed and shook her head, but she bit her bottom lip between her teeth.

“Really?” Mom dragged the word out with such hope he had to laugh.

“Yep.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re finding time to have some fun. I know you weren’t too excited about flying some stuffy bigwig around all summer.”

“Yeah, stuffy bigwigs are the worst.” Tiikaan’s shoulders shook in silent laughter as Merritt whacked him on the arm with a glare.

“I won’t keep you, but well, do you think you might be able to come home tomorrow at two, even if it’s just for a bit?”

“What’s up?”

“Well… you know Sunny.”

He groaned. She’d just gotten out of the hospital. There was no way his sister could already be in trouble again .

“What’s she doing this time?” He held his breath.

“She’s getting married.” Mom tossed out.

Tiikaan blew out a breath in a whoosh. “What?”

Merritt covered her mouth to stifle her giggle.

“Yeah, well, after what she and Davis just went through, she’s not willing to wait another day.” Mom’s voice warbled at the end, and Tiikaan imagined her eyes welling up.

“I didn’t realize she knew him that well.” He rubbed between his eyebrows with the edge of his phone to relieve the worry.

“With their time together last summer and the last two weeks, they both realized how much they mean to each other.” Mom sighed. “It’s sweet, really. Davis is all growly and short with everyone but her. With her, the man is one hundred percent cinnamon roll wrapped up in an overprotective warrior shell.

“He lights up whenever she’s near, and he hasn’t let her out of his sight since they’ve been rescued. It’s like she’s his sunshine. Guess it’s a good thing we named her Sunny.”

Jealousy tainted the happiness he had for his sister. He didn’t realize how lonely he was. He’d been so focused the last six years on getting his guiding license, his planes, and building his business that he hadn’t had time to worry about his lack of love life.

But being with Merritt and suddenly having a ton of time to think had him longing for a future with soft curves and sweet touches instead of just smelly men and long, hard days .

“She tends to make life brighter.” Tiikaan cleared his throat. “You and Dad okay with this?”

“Well, it’s fast, but when you know, you know.” Her words had him glancing at Merritt.

But how did one know for sure, without a doubt, who they were supposed to be with? He had all kinds of emotions jumbling up his mind when it came to Merritt, stuff he’d never experienced with anyone before.

Did that mean there was something special there he should pursue with more zeal?

Should he take a clue from his sister’s boldness and stop tiptoeing around his obvious attraction to Merritt? She still hadn’t pulled her hand from his, so she wasn’t opposed to him.

“So, can you make it?” Mom asked.

“Hold on a sec, Mom.” He put his hand over the phone’s microphone and glanced at Merritt.

She was already nodding.

“Yes. Absolutely, you should go,” Merritt whispered without missing a beat.

Her insistence had his insides warming like one of Mom’s fresh-out-of-the-oven sourdough cinnamon rolls, and he suddenly understood why his mom called Davis that. Looking into Merritt’s expressive face made Tiikaan all soft and squishy.

Cinnamon rolls reminded him of home, comfort, a safe place to unload life’s troubles. He wanted to be that for Merritt.

Dang it.

That so didn’t go with his mighty hunter persona.

“You sure?” He studied her for any hesitation .

“Positive.” She glanced off toward the ocean. “I’m going to be in a meeting most of the day, so you’d just be waiting around, bored out of your mind.”

Something in her tone didn’t ring true. He stared at her, trying to decipher the tightness in her shoulders and press of her lips. When she met his gaze, she smiled, but the expression didn’t erase the worry in her eyes.

“If you’re sure. I’ll be back to Fairbanks by four, five at the latest.” He lifted his eyebrow in a silent question, and she nodded.

He held her gaze as he took his hand off the mic. “Mom, I’ll be there. Just don’t tell Sunny. I’d like to surprise her.”

“Oh great, sweetheart. I think everyone is going to be able to make it.” Someone called to Mom in the background. “I’ve got to run, but I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Bye, Mom. Love you.”

“Love you, too.”

He stuffed the phone back into his pocket and pulled Merritt down the beach. “We’ll fly out early. It’ll only take us about two and a half hours to fly to Fairbanks. Do you have a vehicle there?”

“I’ve rented a car.”

“Okay. Good.” Though it wasn’t good. He didn’t like just leaving her there. “The flight to Tok is just over an hour, so if you need me back earlier, call.”

“It’s fine. You should spend time with your family.” She sighed beside him. “Sunny really is as adventurous in person as she is on her YouTube, isn’t she?”

“Yeah. She’s always kept us on our toes.” He chuckled. “I guess we all kind of did that growing up. ”

“So, I know Sunny’s done all kinds of crazy things from her channel, and I know your brother Gunnar was a pararescueman for the Air Force from her videos of their expedition to the North Pole. I didn’t know anything about that arm of the military until then, but, wow, being a PJ is no joke.”

Tiikaan cringed at the awe in Merritt’s voice. Yes, his brother Gunnar was practically a real-life superhero without the powers. All of his siblings were bigger than life, yet somehow Tiikaan ended up lacking the extraordinary gene.

“Your dad mentioned a Bj?rn when he called to tell you Sunny was missing. Who’s that?” Merritt pointed to a breaching whale off in the distance.

“He’s another brother. He was a helicopter pilot for the special ops division of the Army called the Night Stalkers.”

He shrugged like it wasn’t the big deal it was. “Basically, his missions were always the most dangerous and extreme flying conditions possible. He goes into situations very few pilots would even consider. Elite of the elite.”

“Jeez, and your other siblings?”

He might as well just dump it all on her, then she’d know just how much he didn’t measure up to his family.

“My other brother Magnus is on a Hotshot Crew and travels the US and abroad fighting high-priority wildfires. My sister Lena was a medic in the military. She often went in with special ops. After she got out, she joined a private security firm as a bodyguard. And finally, Astryde was a state trooper for about eight years. She’s now commercial fishing for salmon, captains her own boat and everything.”

“That’s kind of a jump, isn’t it? From trooper to fishing?”

“We had an uncle who had a permit. Before becoming a trooper, Astryde spent every summer since she was thirteen on the boat. When he retired, he passed the permit on to her.”

“How can you pass a fishing permit on? Don’t you just, I don’t know, go to Fish and Game?”

“Not for commercial. It kind of works like mining claims. They only have so many permits available, so when someone is wanting off the boat, they either pass it to someone like an inheritance or sell it. They hardly ever come up for sale.”

He bent down and scooped up a handful of sand. “It kind of surprised us when she got out of law enforcement. She was a trooper in the Child Abuse Investigation Unit of the Bureau of Investigation and seemed to be moving up. Then when she got the permit, she just up and quit.”

“I can understand that. Working in child abuse would be devastating.”

“Yeah. It’d be hard.”

A bright-red piece of sea glass peeked out from the sand. He let the sand filter through his fingers, tossing away the broken, useless shells until just the glass remained. The edges were smooth and the surface beautiful from being battered around.

Glass transformed with life’s tribulations, turning into something that created joy and purpose, while shells broke until there wasn’t much resembling a shell anymore.

Every single one of his siblings’ hardships had transformed them like this glass. While they tumbled among the waves crashing over them, they’d let their faith and strength carry them to shore where they had found new life.

And what had he done?

He shook his head in disgust at himself, handed the glass to Merritt, and shoved his hands in his pockets as he continued down the beach. He’d barely gotten his feet wet before he ran back to safety, hiding in the wilderness from anything that might stretch him beyond what was comfortable.

He couldn’t even succeed at that, not with how his business was one season away from bankruptcy.

No, he was like the shells… broken and useless.