Page 31 of A Light in the Dark
THIRTY-ONE
I would like to shoot cannons with explosive rounds. That sounds like fun.
It took several hours, but the hospital agreed to discharge us. Most of the time was lost enduring a lecture on what Joel could and couldn’t do and when we needed to return for a checkup. Once we escaped, Coraline drove us to her father-in-law’s home.
We dumped Joel with the older man, who ordered us to go away and have a good time out on the town. Joel squeaked his protests over being held hostage in the plastic cage. Laughing every step of the way, I climbed back into the SUV, waving at Moonriver’s leader, who held my neighbor captive.
“He’s going to get payback for that,” Coraline warned me while I climbed inside and buckled my seat belt before closing the door.
“I’m sure he’s going to try, but he’s stuck in a plastic box and forced to endure pampering at the hands of your husband and father-in-law. ”
“We have pet bunnies, and Calden will absolutely force Joel to become friends with them while a human. It’ll spare Joel’s pride if he has trouble with his shift, too. Calden and his father are experts at helping injured and exhausted shifters, so Joel is in good hands.”
At least I wouldn’t have to worry about the luna moth while I was enjoying some freedom. “How are you sure we’re going to beat them?”
“All the newbies are rigging the game, that’s how. We’ve kind of been eliminated by the big, manly gamer men and women running the show. We’re handicaps—or so they think. However, we’re all pissed off we’ve been slated to be handicaps rather than showcasing us with a gamer teaching us the ropes in advance. So, we’ve decided that we are going to sabotage the gamers, form an alliance, and destroy them. You will be our pirate queen, as it has been decided you’ve had the most bullshit thrown at you lately.” Coraline snickered. “They deserve it. They let their egos inflate to the point that we’re precious little jewels they have to protect rather than partners.”
Uh oh. I foresaw a glorious disaster, one I got to participate in, probably with glee. “How are we going to pull this off?”
“Nothing in the rules states we can’t educate ourselves about the game before we play. We just can’t play the game. So, we’ve been studying tactics, general gameplay, and gathering every tip and trick in the book from online forums to beef up our side. It’s my job to get you brought up to speed, explain our strategy, and how we’re going to systematically eliminate key players. We’re saving Calden, Allasandro, and Joel for last. Joel’s perfectly capable of eliminating both of them without any help from you, and we’re going to be focusing on general survival so we can ambush and take Joel out. We’re going to separate into hit teams to make sure we obstruct and lead these ‘good’ players to their doom.”
I foresaw a great deal of chaos. “How many on our team are women?”
“Most of us are women. There are six women on the other side, and the guys all decided to bring spouses, girlfriends, and so on. There are a few exceptions, and they’re teen sons and daughters of the players who hadn’t started gaming yet. Gaming isn’t their thing, and they’re mad they’re having to game but glad their dads wanted to play with them rather than with their moms.” Coraline wrinkled her nose. “The gamers haven’t even clued in they have made a mistake.”
“Joel just seemed really excited to play and wants me to play with him.”
“That’s why we’re working to make sure Joel is the last gamer standing. He’s a gentleman, especially to those of us who don’t game. He just wants you to spend time with him, and we all know it. The rest of those bastards are treating us as a handicap.”
“I mean, Joel knew I’d be a handicap, but he’s confident he can keep me out of trouble.”
“He’s really good at this game, and he’d put you in charge of the resources, so you’d be given an important team job where you’ll shine. The rest of the men are not that bright. And the women might be that bright, but they’re so focused on trying to kill the men that they’ll get eliminated quickly.” Coraline shook her head and headed deeper into Moonriver. “The gamers are going to assume we won’t be using the trade network in the game. We’re going to be doing resource sharing and making sure we’re well supplied. When they’re starting to have to reserve ammunition because their resources are drying up, we’ll have a healthy mine network, supply lines, and basically unlimited upper end ammunition perfect for eliminating our partners. We’re also going to hunt in packs. You’re going to organize us and be in one of our best fortifications, but it won’t look like an excellent fortification. Once we have thinned the gamers some, you’ll come out and help us eliminate the rest. You’ll serve as bait for some of the tougher targets in the fort, too.”
“So, I get to pretend I’m a queen, lure men to their deaths like some siren, and rule the game world?”
“Basically.”
Nice. “You have my attention, Coraline. This sounds like fun.”
“It will be a great deal of fun for us, and I’m confident we can pull it off. They’re expecting us to get underfoot, do our best to have as much fun as we can while clueless, and to keep to ourselves and hide in the holes they plan for us. Joel might give us some trouble because he’ll want to involve you, but we’ll figure out how to cross that bridge when we get there. Mostly, if you play skittish about getting killed off in the game, he’ll settle in to murder any gamers stupid enough to get near you, and he’ll do most of our work for us.”
I laughed at the thought of playing the damsel so he’d murder off his fellow gamers in a tournament, just so I could turn the tables on him with the other inexperienced gamers to steal victory. “Are you all really just going to let me win once we’ve eliminated the other gamers?”
“That’s the idea. As your partner isn’t in the doghouse over being a jerk, it’s only fair he gets the win through you. And this way, we all feel good about how it turns out. We all hate to lose, but we can all accept losing to you.”
“Do we have fancy cannon balls that explode in this game?”
“They can be made, yes.”
“Can I just arm myself with those and fling them into where you’re battling it out?”
Coraline giggled. “Yes, that’s a valid strategy.”
“I would like to shoot cannons with explosive rounds. That sounds like fun.”
“I’ll make sure we can set your fort up to have good ranged weaponry and ammunition—and how to best hide your arsenal from the experienced gamers. That’ll give us all a good goal to work towards. And you might be able to finish off a bunch of those jerks on your own merits, too.”
“Will it be okay if I just kill off as many people as I can?”
“Yes, of course. I’ll let our team know that you’re a vicious tyrant and will murder all you can. You’ve had a hard life, and you deserve to murder as many of us in the game as possible.”
“Let’s get our hair and nails done first. Then I think we should go find out if we can dress up as pirate queens for the game.”
“I like the way you think. We’ll squeeze in dinner somewhere in this adventure.”
“I’m also going to need clothing that convinces Joel not to leave my house at night. I either have jeans and t-shirts or attire suitable for an attorney.”
The woman snickered. “I think I can probably help you with that, too. Calden is incapable of resisting the urge to dress me up, and I’ve figured out how women’s clothing works from his shopping efforts. By the time I’m done with you, Joel will be following you around while drooling.”
“That’s an excellent start.”
We shopped for clothes first, buying enough to fill most of Calden’s SUV. She dressed me in a pair of tight jeans and a blouse with a plunging neckline and sleeves that exposed my shoulders and quite possibly used magic to stay on. While I held no confidence I’d remain covered for the rest of the day, if I managed to lure Joel out of his clothes and to a bed, I’d view it all as money well spent.
While Coraline had wanted to spend Calden’s money on the venture, I’d opted to showcase my independence, paying for the stylist, who gave me a trim and contained it within a French braid, a trend people were embracing to show support for Earth’s refugees. As my adventure in the woods hadn’t done my hands any favors, I had the nail artist even everything out, repair a nail with a minor crack, and apply green polish the match of a luna moth’s wings.
By the time we returned to Coraline’s home, a rumpled Joel waited, his hair sticking up every which way. Judging from his attire, Calden had thrown him into the most casual clothes he could find that happened to fit. I laughed at the man’s expression, which was a blend of dismayed and irritated. “Did that mean wolf refuse to let you dress in one of your suits?”
“He really did. And then he didn’t believe that I need at least twenty minutes to tame my hair after a shower. I was told my hair could run wild and free.”
I could see myself spending time smoothing his hair with my fingers. “Wild and free is a good look on you when in a casual environment. I approve. We conquered, but apparently, I’m dressed to Calden’s standards rather than mine.”
Joel took his time looking me over. “I think I’m going to have to have a talk with Calden about his standards.”
“His standards are expensive.”
“I can afford it.”
“After buying all that silk, are you sure?”
He scowled at me. I grinned.
“She won that one,” Calden informed the luna moth shifter, strolling into the entry area of the townhouse. “As I have been informed that you are a reader, the fireplace has been lit, I’ve started dinner, and there’s a selection of books available for your enjoyment. Read and relax. Hot chocolate or coffee service is also available.”
Coraline giggled. “We get the couch?”
“I did reserve the couch for us while giving them the armchairs. Maybe my father will come over, see that everyone is reading, and leave for a change.”
Judging from Coraline’s bark of laughter, she had zero faith that his father would leave them alone. “Fortunately for us, he’s probably monitoring Stonecreek’s election while regretting his offer to help if Valerie’s elected.”
I heaved a sigh. “I’m going to need your help, Calden. You, too, Joel. That man goes down in our game for this, and I need you experienced gamers to secure my victory over him. Mostly, I want you two to lure him out so I can throw things at him in the game. ”
“Shoot,” Joel informed me with a grin. “If you want to actually kill him in the game, you’re going to have to shoot him.”
“What’s the most primitive weapon I can get my hands on in that game to maximize my satisfaction over his murder?”
The two men regarded me with narrowed eyes before eyeing each other. After a few moments, Calden said, “I promise I won’t kill your woman in the game if you promise not to kill mine for the sake of making my father pay for his crimes.”
“I find these terms to be acceptable. Once your father has paid, we will maintain a grace period for the remainder of that day’s gaming, after which our women are fair prey again.”
To make it clear they discussed serious business, they shook on their deal. Coraline raised a brow, and judging from the way she twitched, she struggled to keep from laughing or smiling. “I thought we weren’t supposed to make deals with the enemy, Calden.”
“In this case, sacrifices must be made. As my father needs to be put in his place, I’m willing to make a deal with the enemy. As far as enemies go, Joel’s not a bad choice for such things. Nobody would believe we’re engaging in a temporary alliance even if you told them. Please don’t tell them. If anyone finds out, it’ll become utter nonsense. Everyone wants a shot at my father. They just want to defeat him in single combat. I know better than to take my father on in single combat. If we’re working together, we might get rid of him early and reduce him to being a supplier.”
“Wait, supplier?” I asked. “What does that mean?”
Joel snickered. “Once a gamer has been killed, they can remain playing, but they’re influencing the game through controlling supplies their fortifications produce. They can also defend their fortifications. If an enemy attacks their town, they will be able to get kills still. It keeps the game interesting. But there are several ways to win. Having the best town is one of those ways, which keeps the killed players working on their territories. Conducting the most trades is another way. The trades section is actually secret, so nobody knows who is going to win that until the very end. Finally, highest number of kills can win you the game.”
“So, there are three potential winners?”
“Four,” Calden replied, and he sighed. “The player with the highest amount of money at the time of the final death also wins. Usually, the person with the highest number of kills also ends up the wealthiest from taking the killed player’s carried resources.”
Interesting. I wondered if us handicaps could sweep all winning categories through trickery and betrayal.
Pirates were supposed to be backstabbing betrayers, and I’d even allow my partner to be the top gamer moth before the pack of scorned women and their teenage boy sidekicks offed him and voted me in as their queen.
I looked forward to plundering Joel, claiming him as my prize, and then using explosives to wipe out my conspirators in the game.
“What’s your plan for taking out your father?” Joel asked.
“That’s the problem. I don’t have a plan. He’s wily, and I don’t know who his partner is.”
Coraline rolled her eyes, shook her head, and headed deeper into the townhouse. “Come with me, Valerie. We’ll leave the men to fetching your pretty clothes out of the SUV while we raid the kitchen. We must choose what your beverage service will be so Calden is happy doing his kitchen work. He gets downright pouty if he can’t do his beverage service. For someone who claims he’d like some time alone, he is just not happy unless he’s in the kitchen fussing when there are guests over.”
“I’m supposed to be a good host, and my wife should not be a slave in the kitchen. It’s my turn. I am the kitchen king tonight, and you just have to deal with beverage service while monitoring our bunnies playing.”
“There are worse ways to go,” Coraline informed me with a smile. “Are you a tea, coffee, or hot chocolate drinker? And if you’re none of those things, we’ll improvise.”
“Can I have my coffee spiked with copious amounts of hot chocolate?”
“You absolutely can. Let’s get some drinks, take our seats, and watch Joel’s brain explode when he identifies where you were shopping.”
“Why is my brain going to explode?” Joel asked in a curious tone.
“One word, Mr. Sampson: lingerie.”