Page 10

CRUX

“I need a fix,” I said, admitting my weakness.

“No,” Halo said firmly. “No drugs.”

“I know, I know. I’m just… thinking out loud.” I let out a long breath.

“I wonder what Skye wanted to talk to Sev about,” Halo asked.

When I didn’t answer, she looked me over. I knew I looked like shit. I felt like shit. I was barely keeping it together and all I wanted was to just burn it all away with a pipe or a needle or a fucking line or something .

“I’ll be two years sober this year,” I told her.

“I know.” There was a quiet pride in her voice, like she was happy for me. It was strange to hear.

She tweaked my sleeve and started walking. “C’mon.”

I followed. “Where are we going?”

Halo said nothing. Instead, she walked to the elevators and pressed the button.

“Don’t we want to stay close? In case of emergency?”

“You have your phone, right? Sev has mine. He’ll text if something happens.”

The elevator announced its arrival with a gentle chime before the doors slid open. Halo and I walked in and she hit the button for floor 2.

“You know I’ve always had empathy for your situation, Crux,” she said. “I know I can be distant and standoffish, but even when we were kids I always had a soft spot for you.”

I eyed Halo, the beautiful, worldly, high fashion model who looked even more lustrous when standing next to me.

“Where are you going with this?” I asked.

“I know you need release. And I’ve found a way to help you with that.”

My mind instantly jumped to the most obvious conclusion. “...uh…”

She snickered. “Not what I meant, you pervert.”

“Well, what else am I supposed to think when you say it that way?”

The doors to the elevator parted and I followed her down yet another colourless, modern hallway. Even if I was blind I would be able to follow the distinct click of her stylish shoes on the linoleum floor.

Halo’s grin lingered until we got to a nurse’s station. I stood next to her and picked a pamphlet out of a display on the desk.

Managing Aura Sickness.

“We would like to donate some blood,” Halo said.

That caught my attention. “We would?”

The nurse smiled. “Wonderful. Have you donated before?”

“No,” I said, as did Halo.

“Well, we’re so glad you’ve made this decision.” She placed two clipboards with information sheets clipped to them on the desk.

“Please fill out these forms, help yourselves to some potato chips and juice, and we will be with you shortly.”

Halo and I sat in chairs. She was dutifully filling out her form and I was just sort of dumbfounded.

“What are we doing?” I whispered to her.

“Doing what little we can. Just trust me, this is a good thing.”

I wasn’t sure what she was getting at, but I filled out the form, ate my chips, and drank my juice. They checked my ID, and I wondered if the red stripe on it that announced I was an alpha looked the same shade as blood.

They led me into a room in the back with several rows of comfortable looking plush chairs, like movie theatre chairs.

My arm was placed on a flat surface on the chair arm and a new nurse with smiling eyes began to set up.

“This is your first time?”

“Yeah,” I said. Did I sound nervous? I couldn’t tell.

“Well, there’s nothing to it,” she assured me. I’m going to swab your arm, then I need you to make a fist.”

I did as I was told and she tied a thin rubber ribbon…

... around my arm.

It was then that I understood Halo’s theory.

I watched the needle go into my arm like it was an old friend, then the blood rushing out my body and through a long tube into some bag somewhere.

It was somehow relaxing, cathartic. A strange substitute for the kind of relief I thought I needed.

And this time, I was helping others instead of hurting myself.

The nurse put a soft rubber ball in my hand. “Squeeze this slowly every second or so, please. It encourages blood flow.”

I did as I was told.

Within five minutes I was in a state of complete zen. My fears of Skye’s condition, my sense of self-worthlessness, money, career, everything just sort of floated away on the energy that I was helping someone else and satisfying a craving at the exact same time.

Halo was in the chair next to me and was sitting back, relaxed like she was sun bathing on a beach, completely unbothered.

The entire process took just under an hour and when it was over, I felt a little depleted but also rejuvenated. The nurse took Halo and I to a new snack buffet and we spent a moment replenishing ourselves with chocolate and cans of juice.

“Thank you for this,” I said. “I knew I needed something, I just didn’t know what it was.”

“We’re family. I’ll always try to help where I can.”

I was chewing a candy bar when I began to feel a pain, not in my body, but almost like it was my aura that was hurting. Halo winced.

“You felt that, too?” Stupid question, of course she did.

“We have to get back to Skye.”

I shoved my snack in my mouth and chugged my juice while Halo simply dropped hers in the trash bin. We didn’t care about etiquette and ran to the elevator. I slammed the button repeatedly, and dove in when the doors opened.

We got to her floor and resumed our run. Severen was outside in the hall, looking through the window in the door, sweat shimmering on his forehead.

“What happened?” We asked.

“I don’t know.” He could barely get the words out. “She’s getting worse.”