Page 4

4

J ack

Wednesday: Wedding minus 10 days

I t was going to be one of those days.

Because it’s Dead End. It’s always one of those days.

We walked back inside, and Tess’s Aunt Ruby, cute as a mayor button in her pink suit, put her hands on her hips. I stifled a groan, because I knew that stance. She was about to put the town hall plan into place.

I enjoyed a town hall meeting almost as much as I enjoyed dental work.

Or being shot.

“I’m going back to my office to set everything in motion. We’d better do it tonight. No use delaying, since we only have ten days to figure this out and a lot of trials to complete. What in the world could all this mean?” Aunt Ruby shook the letter in her hand at us.

My grandfather wasn’t in town, anyway, but he was coming home for the wedding. For somebody who traveled by horse and wagon during his first sixty years, he was definitely logging a lot of airplane miles these days.

“He said, ‘By our command shall you know them. By our dictate shall you attempt them. By our leave shall you achieve them,’” Tess pointed out. “That’s a pretty vague standard, and they can move the goal lines whenever they want. The Fae are tricky that way. Maybe we should reach out to Queen Viviette and see what she says.”

“She signed the letter,” Ruby said doubtfully. “I have to think that she would have told us more if she wanted to, though. It’s worth a try, maybe?”

Tess sighed. “I’ll try to reach out to Frazzle. Sometimes if I leave honey out for her, she’ll come to visit me. Well, more to visit my cat than me, but still.”

“Okay. I’m out.” Ruby kissed Tess on the cheek, patted my arm, and waved to Eleanor, and then she was gone.

“I should have given her the collar to try on Pickles the pug,” Tess said, grinning.

“What collar?”

Eleanor explained, and then she asked me to turn into a tiger, so she could see if the collar worked on cats. I declined, but I thought the idea was pretty funny.

“I’m not sure I want to know what you’re thinking when you’re in your tiger form,” Tess said, tapping her chin with one finger. “It’s probably Eat squirrel, chase laser pointer. ”

I laughed. “Not a big fan of squirrel. And I’m thinking the same thing as a tiger as I am when I’m in this shape: Protect Tess. Find food. Take a nap.”

“Cats. You’re all the same,” Tess said, but she walked over and hugged me. Even in her Dead End Pawn T-shirt, faded jeans, and sneakers, she was the most beautiful woman I’d ever known. I knew this kind of thing was subjective, but to me, she was perfect.

Funny, smart, and so caring. The entire town loved her. I didn’t mind the long legs, gorgeous red hair, or the big blue eyes, either. And—miraculously—she loved me.

“I can’t believe it’s still ten days till the wedding,” I said, pulling her close. “Are you sure we can’t elope? I’m ready for you to be my wife.”

Eleanor groaned and rolled her eyes. “You two are even worse than Bill and I were.”

“Oh, I don’t think so,” Tess said. “Or do I need to bring up the champagne incident?”

Eleanor’s face turned bright red, which was an interesting clash with her orange dress. “Never you mind, Tess Callahan.”

“What champagne incident?”

Tess laughed. “Sorry. I was sworn to secrecy. I can only say?—”

Her phone rang, loudly, with Girls Just Want to Have Fun as the ringtone.

“Oh, no. It’s Lorraine. I hope it’s not a problem with the catering.”

Beau’s Diner, a fixture in Dead End and the only sit-down restaurant in town for a long time, was providing the food for the wedding. I’d asked Tess if she didn’t prefer a fancier menu, but she’d only laughed and said we were lucky the Southern United Methodist Women’s group wasn’t doing a potluck.

Apparently, there’d been multiple offers.

“What?” Tess’s voice got a little squeaky, and she shot me a look of dismay. “I didn’t even know there was a troll in the Dead End swamp!”

“Put it on speaker.”

She nodded at me and tapped her phone.

“… is, and he’s here. And he wants lunch. And he smells so terrible. I can’t let him eat inside, or he’ll run everybody else out of the place. The health department would declare Beau’s a hazmat location, if the health department had any jurisdiction in Dead End.”

For former mayor Lorraine Packard to be mentioning bureaucratic nonsense, she must be pretty stressed out.

“Then let him eat outside,” I said.

“Jack? Sure, but I can’t just tell him to eat outside, like a stray dog. No matter how bad he smells, he’s a citizen of Dead End.”

“No, Lorraine, I meant to set up a few tables for an outdoor dining section.”

“He’ll see right through it when nobody else eats out there,” she hissed into the phone.

“Is he in hearing range?” Tess asked.

“I don’t know. Jack and his superior tiger hearing made me rethink who can hear what from where. So, what now?”

“It’s simple,” Tess said with a sigh. “Jack and I will come over and eat lunch in the new outdoor dining area with him.”

“We will?” I pointed at Eleanor. “I think it’s time you give your poor, hardworking employee a long lunch break.”

“Yes,” Tess agreed, her eyes lighting up. “Do you and your new husband want to have a nice long lunch on me? Take petty cash and?—”

“Oh, no,” Eleanor said, backing up. “I packed a lunch. I’ll stay here and start inventory. It’s all you guys.”

“Okay.” Time to man up. Or tiger up. “I’ve smelled some pretty awful things back in my rebel soldier days. How bad can it be?”

All three women groaned, and I smacked myself in the forehead. Would I never learn?

“How bad can it be?” is one thing you never, ever say in Dead End.

“Okay. We’re on the way.”

“Thanks, Tess.” Lorraine hung up, probably before we could change our minds.

Eleanor picked up a rag and industriously polished a shelf. “So busy here. Too busy to go to lunch. By the way, did you ever decide if you’re closing the shop for your honeymoon?”

Tess gave Eleanor a wry grin. “Yes, that shelf really needs cleaning after I just cleaned it this morning,” she said dryly. “About the shop. I’d love it if you’d open the shop for at least a few of the ten days we’ll be gone.”

“Where are you going?”

“It’s a surprise,” I told her.

“Tess doesn’t know?”

“Tess knows. We’re just not telling anybody else. Less chance of dead bodies showing up that way. If?—”

I stopped speaking when I heard a car door slam shut in the parking lot and the sound of somebody racing up to the shop.

“Susan. And she’s in a hurry.”

Tess and Eleanor were used to my Superior Tiger Hearing, so they didn’t blink.

The door slammed open, and Sheriff Susan Gonzalez rushed in. “We’ve got another dead body.”