Page 60 of A Crown of Tears and Treason (The Curse of Silver Secrets and Cruel Shadows #1)

Chapter

Sixty

EVIE

I ’d never had nerves like these in my entire life.

These weren’t the leaden, vengeful jitters that had engulfed me before my first wedding. I no longer had to endure the weight of the loved-up mask I’d been forced to wear as Leesa fluttered behind me with combs crafted with mother-of-pearl and hairpins that ended in golden pearls.

No, these nerves were, dare I say it, light. Flutters of excitement dancing in my chest, whirling in my stomach, making my knees shake.

My reflection in the mirror had a glimmer in her eyes and a quirk to her lips. I looked eager. Thrilled.

The old me wanted to curse myself for it. Had I not learned the things I wanted most had a way of being snatched from me?

I shook my head, earning a curt tsk from Leesa. Nobody could snatch Zandyr away even if they tried. The man was lethal grace incarnate, he could probably fell the entire palace if he so chose.

And I was marrying him. Me .

The Lost Daughter who’d been dragged back to Clan life by her hair, bloody and scared, more feral than courtly.

Yet here I was, smiling at myself in these white undergarments adorned with pearls on the straps, imagining Zandyr’s teeth dragging them down my shoulders.

A shiver raced down my spine and my cheeks colored. I was two lascivious thoughts away from squirming in my seat.

Patience. I needed to be patient.

That’s what wedding nights were made for, right? Though a part of me was miffed that the circumstances had forced us to wait so long. I’d had big plans for my last days as a fiancee. From the way Zandyr’s eyes caressed me every time we were in the same room, his plans were even bigger.

But I’d had to recuperate after the kidnapping ordeal. Now I was healed, my energy returned, though there was still a dullness in the connection with Zandyr. The flickers I got were still brimming with that same curious dread. Sprinkled between them were waves of…affection? I couldn’t name the emotion, but it was comforting and delightful.

Perhaps his unease would vanish once we passed this day. Whoever had dared come after me wouldn’t do it at my second wedding again, would they?

I’d strapped my switchblade bracelet on my wrist just the same. It didn’t go with any of the golden jewels Leesa kept putting on me, but I couldn’t see myself without it now. That little blade that nobody had thought could do real harm had saved me so many times. Small, but deadly. Powerful.

A bit like me.

The one who wouldn’t be interesting past the wedding night . Who’d been forbidden from learning magic. Who’d been squirreled away in the mountains.

Here I was, looking like the queen I would become. Perhaps, someday soon, I would feel like her, too.

Even the bruises had receded. What was left of them had been hidden by whatever paste Leesa brushed onto my face, making it glow. Nobody would be looking at my nose anyway. My eyes had been lined with black and gold kohl, making them appear bigger and mysterious.

Leesa had traced my lips perfectly with a red pigment that wouldn’t smear, according to her.

I looked…beautiful.

Beautiful and happy.

My spirit was so at odds with the strange atmosphere in the house, though.

Goose raced between my bedroom and downstairs, coming back with so many accessories and jewels, I didn’t know where he’d found the space to store them.

Adara stood in the corner, shrouded in a cloud of misery, dressed in her usual mercenary leathers, her knives glinting more menacingly.

I expected Goose to be fidgety and Adara to be morose.

But Leesa surprised me.

She had a slight frown on her face and kept biting her lower lip. Her bubbly energy was dampened. Not as much as last night, but…

“Are you alright?” I asked.

She stopped twirling a curl around her fingers and looked at me in the mirror. A small smile graced her lips. “You know how I’m sure you’ll be a good ruler?”

I shook my head slightly, careful not to jostle too much and ruin her hard work.

“You’re getting married today and from the way you’re vibrating, I’m guessing you’re nervous. You’ve just escaped death,” Leesa said in that ancient way of hers that didn’t fit her youthful face. It was like an old soul had entered a doll at one point and brought it to life. “And yet you’re concerned whether I am alright.”

“Yes?” I said, like it was the most normal thing in the world.

Leesa, Goose, Adara…they didn’t know it, but they’d helped bring me out of my shell. Out of the cage of my upbringing. They’d trained me. Fed me. Defended me.

They were as close to friends as I’d ever had.

“It’s a rare thing, that’s all,” Leesa said, going back to frowning at my hair.

“You didn’t answer my question.”

Leesa’s hands stilled. In the corner, Adara finally looked our way, her head moving slowly toward us. Waiting.

Leesa looked long and hard at my reflection. There was a storm raging behind her beautiful eyes. She opened and closed her mouth, hesitating in every movement.

Finally, she shook her head, as if severing whatever grim thought had taken over her.

“Your dress is just a different shade than what I thought it would be,” she said. “And a different shape. Bigger.”

That was an understatement. My wedding dress had been crafted from endless layers of golden fabric, sewn so closely together, I didn’t know when one ended and the others began. It was a cloud of gold, trimmed with embroidery so fine, even my mountain eyes recognized its value. Little red and blue jewels twisted between the strands, glimmering. Kaya had warned me Blood Brotherhood wedding dresses were a fearsome thing to behold.

From a distance, the trim looked almost purple. The perfect blend of my Protectorate blue and Zandyr’s Blood Brotherhood red.

The fabric was precious, but sturdy. Crisp. It wouldn’t drift in the wind like the Elekan silk from my first dress–it would also be heavier.

“Too long,” Adara finally deigned to say, the first words she’d spoken today. Whatever had rattled Zandyr lay heavy on her, too, it seemed. “You can’t run in it.”

“Do you really think we’ll be attacked?” I asked.

“No,” she said after a long pause. “But it’s always good to be prepared.”

“You think the advisors will try anything?” After all, the carriage still stood in front of my fence, empty as on the day Goose had brought it. The advisors had either heard Zandyr had found me in the depths of Malhaven or they’d figured out my ruse.

“They would be stupid to, especially now.” Adara gave me a long, steady look. “Remember what today is about. A Clan wedding that will make you queen once Eldryan and Zavoya give up the throne. It is part of Clan life. And Clan life is vicious.”

“Adara?”

“Yes?”

“Please stop trying to cheer me up, you’re making me more nervous.”

Adara huffed a sigh that sounded the tiniest bit like a startled laugh. “Keep your wits about you.”

“I intend to.” I loosed a long breath. I probed the connection with Zandyr. He sent another gentle wave, almost caressing my spine. “I know how I got here, Adara. And I intend to be a great queen. Eventually.”

Adara nodded, but said nothing else, as her eyes trailed back to the window. As if she was waiting for some unforeseen enemy.

I returned my gaze back to the mirror. I wasn’t the same Evie that had gotten ready for her first marriage. And if someone–or something–attacked today, I would be ready. I would have a groom on my side who wouldn’t hide behind my skirts to save his own hide. No guard stood at my door to make sure I didn’t run away or reveal secrets.

This wedding was different.

I was different.

And my future would also be so very different than the one I would have endured by Fabrian’s side.

By the time Leesa was done, the top of my hair stood at least a foot above my scalp. Pearls were strewn through the strands, some hanging in lovely strands across the many curls and pleats she’d wrestled my stubborn locks into.

It took the strength of Adara, Leesa, and myself to get me in that wedding dress.

It sat snug against me, as if someone had taken my measurements during the night; I had to congratulate Zavoya, she truly had an eye for the beautiful trinkets of this world.

I tried not to think about how someone had also studied me to make the imposter look exactly like me.

The fabric, sturdy and stubborn as it was, felt wonderful against my body.

A long, embroidered train started from my shoulders and ended a few generous feet behind me.

The neckline scooped lower than I expected, putting whatever chest I didn’t have on display, and letting the ruby jewels hanging from my neck shine.

I shuddered a breath as I glanced in the mirror one last time.

I looked regal.

With Adara, Leesa, and Goose’s help, I slowly made my way downstairs. The veranda had been decorated with plump roses and clusters of purple flowers I couldn’t name.

“This is beautiful.” I gently floated my hand above the rows of garlands, careful not to disturb them.The pile of gifts was spreading, countless letters of congratulations placed on top.

I patted Zandyr’s letter waiting in my dress pocket. I had controlled myself and not opened it, no matter how hard curiosity had clawed at me, and I was sure he hadn’t either.

Why read words when we could feel each other?

As I neared the steps, I squared my shoulders.

This day would be exhilarating.

Exhausting.

Exciting.

After surviving my first wedding, the snake, the Serpent assassins, and the masked figures, gods forgive me, but I felt invincible. Ready to start the next chapter of my life.

With Zandyr at my side.

Together, we could truly be unstoppable. I felt that potential, connection or not.

Alongside him, I owned the most important feeling of all–freedom.

Free to train. To learn. To sneak around to my heart’s content.To be admired and not made to feel lesser.And when he looked at me, I felt desired. It was a powerful sensation, to know you were wanted. Not for a tousle in the sheets or a few awkward nights.

For my presence.

For my potential.

For me.

He’d faced the most vicious Clans to claim me. Now he would become mine and I would become his.

Forever.

I stepped down into the courtyard–my sandy, barren courtyard. As soon as I found a moment of rest, I’d bring blooms and plump leaves into it. Make it come alive, just as I had in Phoenix Peak.

Adara stood to my left, Leesa and Goose to my right.

Together, we walked to the gate.

Then halted as thunderous steps roared onto the path.