Page 155 of With a Cherry On Top

“No, of course not.” I squeeze her hands before releasing them, trailing my own down her arms. “But what’s thealternative? Waiting for them to find out in the worst possible way?”

“The alternative is we just keep having fun. Secretly. We don’t let anyone else make it complicated, so we can continue to enjoy this. So we don’t lose each other.”

She’s scared. I kiss her forehead, taking a moment. Of course we can’t do that, but the thought that she wants to keep me hidden because she’s afraid something will come between us speaks to how much she cares about this.

“Are you worried about your mom?”

“No. What isshegoing to do?”

“Then what?”

Her lips part, but nothing comes out for a long time. Eventually, she tucks her head under my chin. “Well, for one, you say you’re ready to come clean, but...are you sure you’re prepared for the consequences?”

“Yes,” I say honestly. I can’t imagine losing Amelie or Logan, but I can’t continue to live my life like a hostage of my own past. If Charlotte is the proof they need to decide I’m an irredeemable fuckup, then so be it. “They’ll get over it. Probably. We have a better chance if we come clean, that’s for sure. But I’m ready for the alternative.”

I barely catch the flicker of something vulnerable in her expression before she sits up and reaches for the sheet to cover herself. “We can tell Logan if you really want, but leave Amelie out of this.”

Oh, come on. What’s her problem with Amelie? She’s fine with Primrose, fine with Josie, with all the women in my life but her—I don’t get it. “Why not Amelie?”

“Because I don’t know her.”

I smirk. “As opposed to the long-standing friendship you share with Logan?”

“At least I’ve met him.”

Yes, and he insulted her, then me. It’s not exactly a foundation built on trust.

“Okay, uh . . . I think we need to talk about this.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.” She swings her legs over the side of the bed, and I reach for her. When I try to pull her back, she resists. I feel the tension thrumming beneath her skin, the walls going back up.

I don’t know how to break through them.

“Charlotte?” I call, gently pulling her back. “We got better at this, didn’t we? At talking about our feelings?”

She bites her bottom lip. “I’m sorry, I just...I don’t think this is a good idea. It’ll ruin everything, and I really don’t want to lose you. In fact, I can’ttakelosing you—I think it’d actually break me. So, no, I’m not okay with this.”

Watching the anguish play on her face, I squeeze her hand in comfort. I don’t get it—Charlotte is the most unapologetic and secure person I know. She offered fictional prostitution services to Logan when he offended her. She came out of a jail celllaughing. Why is she so afraid of this?

“And besides, what’s that going to change? If anything, my mom will just make it harder for us to be together, and we don’t want that, right?”

I run my hands along her arms, tracing the warmth of her skin and trying to soothe her. “Maybe we could start working on a version of your life more similar to your fictional town. One where your mom doesn’t have this control over you.”

“Yeah?” She waves her hand around. “I’ll get my own apartment, then? Quit modeling, look for a job as a fashion designer?”

When she looks up at me with a frown, I know she’s just masking the questions with snarky remarks. That’s what she wants, and this is her asking me if I think she can make it. “That’sexactlywhat you do.”

She laughs, like it’s a fun dream to think about but not one she believes in yet. “I don’t even know how to...” She shrugs, frustrated. “I don’t know. Pay rent? Cook food? Change a lightbulb? Beatrice is right, I’m helpless.”

“Well, guess what? I’m a chef, and I’ve paid rent for”—better not focus on that—“a long time.”

“So I’d go from relying on my mom to relying on you.”

“No, because I’d teach you, Charlotte. I wouldn’t treat you like you’re too stupid to learn.”

Her face puckers in thought.

“Look, this is a lot to think about. And I’m not saying you should walk away from your life if that’s not what you want to do. I’ll support you either way. But what we’re talking about...it’s not a pipe dream. We can have it—all of it.”