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My vision swirled. My body fell into the grass.

“I’m sorry,” Lanson stuttered, backing away from me slowly. “I’m sorry, I’m sor—sorry. I have to get into The Golden City, Huntyr. If Headmistress finds out it was you… I can’t… I can’t do this.”

“Lanson!”

“I’m sorry!”

What the fuck? Was this really happening?Lanson backed up even more, nearly tripping over his own feet, before giving me a look that felt somewhat like a mixture of both betrayal and disgust.

My vision spun again; dark tunnels threatened my eyesight.

I was losing too much blood. My limbs felt numb, my chest grew cold.

I was too lost to argue anymore as Lanson ran away, too afraid of the dark monster before him. Afraid of what he saw in me.

When my eyes fluttered closed, I didn’t fight them.

Chapter

Twenty-One

Itried—begged the goddess, even—to make it to that door.

I didn’t know how much time passed, I only knew that everything in my body was telling me to keep going, to keep crawling.

I was so close, just a few feet away. But darkness swarmed my vision, welcoming and cool. I suddenly could not remember the last time I’d slept, the last time I’d relaxed, the last time I’d given in. How good would it feel to surrender to that darkness, to stop fighting, just for once.

Surrender. What a strange, foreign thought.

I quit crawling, limbs aching and blood dripping, and I gave in.

My hands shook, my legs wobbled. Lord stood behind me and watched, waiting for my next move.

It was my first kill.

Lord told me I was ready before he brought me out here. I never traveled this far outside of Midgrave. I didn’t feel ready, but he knew more than I. If he thought I was strong enough to kill a vampyre, I could trust him.

Besides, I was thirteen years old. It was time I learned to protect Midgrave just like the other Phantoms. I wasn’t just some kid who lurked in the shadows, following everyone’s every move. I was a fighter.

A killer.

“You have to be fast,” Lord whispered behind me. His words were sharp and fierce, his voice slicing through the freezing night air like a sword. “It will kill you if you hesitate for even a moment. I won’t help you, Huntyr. You have to do this on your own.”

I clenched my jaw and fought back the thoughts that came rushing to my mind—the thoughts that told me I wasn’t good enough. Wasn’t fast enough. Wasn’t strong enough.

Those thoughts were useless. I was just as good a fighter as the rest of the Phantoms, and by the time I reached their age, I would be even better.

I would be the best.

I heard the vampyre before I saw it. I would have nightmares about the half-gurgling, foul sounds that came from the creature’s mouth as it stumbled toward me.

My heart pounded so fast, I thought I was going to die any second.

My small knife felt too heavy in my now-sweaty hand.

“Focus,” Lord hissed behind me. “Do not disappoint me, child.”

I blinked as the vampyre stumbled forward again, moving faster than I expected. I had seen vampyres before, sure, but never so… close.