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“Bluntly speaking, you were dead inside.”
“Comfortably numb,” I retorted.
He released a whoosh of air, staring me down as if his eyes were cocked guns, ready to fire. Heat rolled off his large, looming body as though he were dissipating into a cloud of rage. “What do you want, Dylan?” His nostrils flared. “Do you want me on my knees?”
The silence buzzed between us like a persistent bug.
“Well?” he barked. “Do you?”
Would you?
It was as though he unheard my spoken question, because he answered, “In a heartbeat. My ego stood no fucking chance. Neither did my heart. So what’s it gonna be?”
“No,” I admitted quietly. “It wouldn’t help. I’ve made up my mind. I’m taking Gravity in the morning and driving up north to stay with Mama and Marty.”
Max at the Alchemist was going to be a couple bartenders short, with Tucker down for the count and me running away, but he’d been filling up spots ever since Faye’s health scare.
Rhy grabbed my cheeks, pulling me into him. My body gravitated toward his instantly, like a magnet. Foreheads meeting. Lips touching. My chest flush against his.
“You’re walking out on this?”
“I have to, Rhy. It’s become too risky. Too high-stakes. You made me fall, but you will not make me shatter. I have to do this. For me. For my daughter. I have to get away.”
“I love you, and you’re turning your back on me, just like them,” he said quietly.
Them. His parents. Hurting him destroyed me, but I knew he’d move on if he understood.
“No, Rhyland. I’m turning my back on myself. You deserve more than I could give you. I won’t let you settle for a woman who would never be willing to fully give you her heart.”
“Even if I’ll settle for less?” His eyes darkened.
“Especially if you do,” I said quietly. “You are worthy of the kind of love you are willing to give.”
He was about to argue, but I shut him up by crashing my lips against his. The kiss that followed put me somewhere between heaven and hell, stuck in a limbo of unbearable physical pleasure and an excruciating heartache. His mouth claimed mine hungrily, tongue finding my own, and before I knew it, he was on top of me on the floor, my hands fumbling with his belt as he hiked my red dress up, tugging my panties to one side. We didn’t have time to get undressed. We both knew it was goodbye. It tasted as much, the bittersweetness of it exploding in our mouths and dripping down our chins.
And I loved him, in that moment, more than I’d loved anyone else in my entire life.
Because I knew that he was giving me a piece of him to keep before we parted ways.
RHYLAND
Iwas nursing my third bottle of whiskey since Dylan left when my door came down, followed by Row’s chilling baritone reverberating, “Timber!”
Unflinching, I kept my glazed stare on the TV. I had no idea what the fuck I was watching—I just knew Dylan always watched it when she lived downstairs. A bunch of grossly underage and over-fuckable doctors in a TV drama. I couldn’t remember what season I was on, but I was eighty-three percent certain most of the cast members had already died in the most unlikely way possible, and whoever hadn’t died had left. I was beginning to get to the root of Dylan’s trust issues.
“Is this…puke next to you?” Row’s repulsed voice hovered somewhere above my head, and I spotted the tip of his combat boot shuffling a Chinese takeout container around.
“Could be refried rice. Your guess is good as mine,” I slurred into the rim of my whiskey bottle, taking another swig.
“Why are you watching Grey’s Anatomy, man?”
“Waiting for a nip slip.”
“Don’t hold your breath.”
“Tempted to. Finishing it all seems like a grand idea.”
Row snorted, ignoring my theatrics. “Why not just watch porn?”