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“It’s easiest at first to use hand gestures. Some incantations require them, especially if they are more complex. Simpler spells, like summoning elements or shaping them, usually don’t. But when you’re starting, they’re very helpful in directing the flow of Source. So do whatever feels natural with your hands. Now, aim for the bucket and use your incantation.”

I raised a hand toward the bucket, fingers half flexed, and spoke the words, calling my own power within me and summoning the power without. The forces above, and so below.

A heavy splash of water crashed down onto a standing stone a few paces behind the bucket.

Eilith chuckled and nodded. “A good first attempt! Plenty of water, not so much bucket. Try again.”

I tried again, summoning just as much excess of water, and only marginally closer to the bucket.

“Again,” Eilith said.

I repeated it over and over until the water hit the bucket, although the first time it hit so hard it knocked the bucket over. I repeated the exercise until the roaring splash became a gentle flow and I finally filled the bucket without spilling it. I was breathless, and my head had begun to ache.

“Well done, Halja. You’re catching on fast. This evening, fill the tub for your bath that way. And I expect to find not a drop of water on the floor.” She began to walk away, but turned back. “Oh, and if you want it warm, play with adding heat.”

“How do I do that?” I asked.

“Most of magic is intuitive, Halja. So intuit it! Let the fear of another cold bath inspire you!”

“Is this how you’ve been filling your bath all along?” I asked. “While I’ve been carrying bucket after bucket to the tub for myself like an idiot?”

“I’ll never tell!”

I could hear Eilith’s cackle as she strode back down to the house.

∞∞∞

My bath was cold that night, and the next.

But on the third, it was triumphantly hot.

Although my progress with Sourcery took time, I noticed changes in my awareness, the very energetic feeling of my own body, almost immediately. I felt the life, the Source, in everything around me. I noticed the animals, the trees, even the energy of the garden. And I could feel Eilith when she movedaround the steading. Even when I couldn’t see her, I had a sense of where she was. It was overwhelming, like a rushing waterfall of energy that I had no idea how to tame. I decided to ask Eilith about it one evening.

“You have a deep well of Source within you, Halja. And a deep connection to it outside of yourself. It’s what makes you a Sourcerer, but it also means you feel the life energy of other living things, if you try. With practice, you can use your power to read both the location and condition of others. But just know that if you try to read others who also use Source, they will feel it. Try it on me now,” she commanded.

“Eilith, I don’t want to pry–”

“Yes, please do. I want to show you this. It’s important.” Her tone was firm, but not unfriendly. “Let your awareness reach out, just like you normally let it flow. And when you feel my presence, focus on it. Like looking closely at something. Look closely at me.”

I tried and immediately felt the energy of her, like a bright light in my inner vision. I focused on it, feeling around it, and felt the waves of her emotions respond. I felt her tiredness, the soreness in her hip, a glimmer of affection for me, and an underlying satisfied contentedness at her place in the order of things, in the world.

Then, as suddenly as I felt it, it was snuffed out. The light of another within my awareness dimmed, and I felt nothing more from her.

“Where did it go?” I asked, confused, and she laughed.

“I shut you out,” Eilith said. “Closed off my own energy to you so you couldn’t read it. And I suggest you learn to do the same, especially before you go into town. If you think it’s overwhelming here, wait until you’re surrounded by a village full of strangers with no self-awareness of their energy. You’ll be blinded by it.”

“How do I do that?”

“Like you do anything: With practice. But this one is even more intuitive. I’ll give you a hint though. The trick is within your meditations. It’s inside that calm, dark place you go.”

I nodded, resolving to try it the next morning. I found it came just as easily as the reading of Eilith’s energy had. Throughout the next days, I practiced with flexing it on and off, letting my awareness wander throughout the steading, then reeling it back in.

Setting a boundary around my power was easy enough at Eilith’s steading. She let me practice reading her energy at times, but mostly we both kept our minds to ourselves. She told me that, more important than reading others, was protecting my own inner power from those more skilled than myself. Strong walls would keep me safe from any prying minds, and that was what I was to practice.

∞∞∞

After my encounter with the nuckelavee, I was more concerned about my safety than I had been previously. I had always thought my parents exaggerated the dangers of shadowfiends to scare my sister and I into following our curfew. And perhaps they did, but the brush I’d had with death had been very real, and I did not like that my only option had been to flee. I wanted to be able to fight too.