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“Fae folk had a great affinity for magic,” Eilith began to explain. “It came to them all naturally– No, it didn’t just come to them, that’s not the right way to say it. More like they were made of it, grown from it. Their bodies themselves are an extension of nature, of Source. It’s why so many of them could shapeshift so easily.” I could feel her watching me as she spoke.

“Like selkies?” I asked, swirling my fingers and feeling the power within the water move.

“Selkies, wolf-women, the huldra, and others. The more powerful of the fae, the Archfae, could grow a whole forest by barely lifting a finger. Their powers could shape reality as they wished.”

“Will you teach me?” I could not hide my eagerness.

“Of course, Halja. It is already in your blood, though it will take time to bring it out, to teach you to harness it and manipulate it as you choose. But time we have! And it is a gift worth learning.”

∞∞∞

I followed Eilith up a small hill above the steading, winding through old pines. It had begun to snow, and everything was clean and pure with a fresh white blanket. We crested the hill and I stopped. There, in a clearing shrouded in mist, were two circles of standing stones. Exactly as I had seen them in my dream, but wrapped in clean frost instead of fountaining dark blood.

Eilith turned back to me. “Everything alright?”

“I… I’ve seen this place before.”

She narrowed her eyes. “When?”

“My first night here,” I said. “I dreamed I was walking through these stones.”

“You’ve never been to these woods before?” she asked.

“No, I’ve only ever been to Skeioholm on the Glyg Road. Never left it.”

She nodded and then simply proceeded toward the stones as if my prophetic dream wasn’t worth further discussion. I followed and stepped through the familiar circles with caution, half expecting to suddenly drown in blood or be transformed into a wolf.

“They won’t bite, girl. Don’t be scared.” Eilith placed a hand on one of the gigantic stones of the outer ring and closed her eyes a moment.

I walked around the inner circle, looked at the stones closely. But nothing changed. My boots creaked in compressed snow. Somewhere in the woods, the deep croaks of a pair of ravens echoed.

Approaching the outer ring of standing stones, I placed a bare palm on the cold rock, closing my eyes. Nothing happened, but I stood a moment longer in case Eilith was watching.

Then a faint, glimmering buzz met my palm. Just a trace of warmth, a near imperceptible tingle. A familiar, pulsating energy, the same I had felt in the stream, and in the kitchen that day with my mother. I suppose I should have been expecting it.

Eilith pulled me from my thoughts and instructed me to sit on one of the stones, where we commenced my first lesson. It was not what I anticipated. In fact, it was quite underwhelming for my first true lesson in Sourcery.

“To learn to work with Source, to connect with nature, you must first learn about your own nature, your own limits. You must understand your own being and awareness. So we start within. Close your eyes.”

I did as I was told.

“Now, sit comfortably, but not lazily. Back straight, chin level. Don’t hunch over. You’re a woman, not a shrimp. Good. Take a deep breath in through your nose, let it out through your mouth. Feel the flow of energy along your spine. Feel where your feet touch the earth, where the breath enters your body, where the stone supports you from beneath. Continue to breathe, deep. With intention.”

I sat and breathed, breathed and sat. Eilith was quiet for a while.

“I’m sorry, Eilith,”––I opened my eyes––“but what does this have to do with Source?”

“It has everything to do with Source. You must establish a connection to your inner self before you can even begin to connect that inner self with the outer world, the external powers around us.”

“And I do that with my eyes closed?”

“Don’t interrupt, I am explaining,” she said. “Yes, the easiest way to establish the connection inward is to focus inward, to drop some outward sensory perception. There are more ways of knowing than just seeing. You can know by experience, or you can know on a deeper level. The best word I have found for this knowing is ‘intuition.’ Intuition is what’s buried under all the labels you’ve used, all the memories you’ve referred to, all the experiences you’ve had. Intuition is knowing with your bones, your being, your soul. And that is the knowing we’re looking for.

“Bring your attention within yourself. Follow your breath, the feel of it. Where does that breath go? What does it feel like inside your body?”

She was quiet for a moment as I focused on my breathing.

“Now, feel the part of you that’s feeling that energy, that breath. Your awareness of the moment, of yourself. Feel where your awareness sits. Feel its depth, its consistency, its density.What does it feel like? How heavy is it, what texture? Where are its edges?”