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“I can’t believe this! I didn’t even know you were—oh, God, do you know who the father is?”
“Of course I do.”
Faina’s face scrunches up. “Do I know?”
“Erik,” I murmur, meeting her gaze. “I’ve been sleeping with him since… since the construction accident, actually.”
“Oh, my God.” Faina’s face scrunches further and then she smiles. “Do you like him?”
“It’s just sex,” is my default answer, but it oddly feels like a lie.
“Is it?” Faina tilts her head. “Look at you, breaking all the old traditions.”
“Did you think I would just wait until the perfect moment and then marry myself off into some other family?”
“Maybe. I contemplated your choosing someone from one of the higher families, but not your bodyguard.” Her lips press together. “It’s kind of sexy.”
“Stop it.” I shove at her lightly. “Fuck. I never thought this would happen. I mean, I guess it’s obvious, but with everything else going on I just…” Shaking my head, a sudden impending sense of dread washes over me.
A baby.
How can I be responsible for a baby with everything else going on? The Cartel? My new businesses? The people I’m trying to help? Finding out who is trying to kill me?
I suddenly grasp Faina’s hand. “You can’t tell anyone.”
“I won’t.”
“I mean it, Faina. The last thing I need is for this to get out.”
“Well, aren’t you going to tell Erik?”
“No.”
“No?”
“He’s—it’s just sex, like I said.” As if he isn’t the sweetest person who’s ever paid attention to me. “I’m sure he just signed up for some good fucking. Stress relief. Not fatherhood.”
“You didn’t sign up for motherhood either,” Faina points out. “These things happen.”
“He can’t know. No one can know. If people find out, it will be just another way to look at me like I’m the weakest person in power.”
Faina frowns. “I hate how true that is.”
I close my eyes and will away the churning dread in my gut. “Viktor is furious at me, and he got shot for us. A warning, I’m sure. We have until the gala to pay back tens of millions to the Cartel. My new businesses are babies and barely scraping even. This is quite literally the worst time for this to happen.”
“There’s never a good time,” Faina murmurs. “People just say that to act like their lives are together.”
“Maybe,” I sigh. “But this doesn’t leave this room, okay?”
“You can’t keep it a secret forever.”
“I just…” My grip tightens on her hand and I briefly close my eyes again. “Put it out of your mind until after the gala.”
“That’s still two months away.”
“I don’t care.”
“Anastasia, you can’t ignore this.”