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“So do you, if you were Lucifer.”

“Touché. The difference is that I had doubts about the argument with Father. He didn’t. When a group of us tried to go back, well, you see the result.”

The little gears clank in my brain. I look out the window.

“The roadkill that attacked my men. They’re Hellions, aren’t they?”

Maleephas nods.

“The ones who wanted to return with me so we could throw ourselves at God’s feet, hoping to receive his infinite mercy. What they received was what you saw in the grove. I received this prison.”

I take out a Malediction. Light it and offer it to him. He takes it and sniffs, hands it back to me.

“It smells awful. Is that what you do in Pandemonium these days? Pollute yourselves with that?”

“We have all kinds of pollution. You should try Aqua Regia. Or there might be some unicorn salad left in the truck if you want to try it.”

He shakes his head.

“Such a stupid world we made together. It was going to rival Heaven but it turned into more ruin.”

“You know what’s funny?” I say. “Guess where Samael is these days.”

“I’m afraid I’ve lost my appetite for games.”

“He’s back in Heaven. He had doubts about the argument too. At least the part about the war. He’s back upstairs trying to make it up to the old man.”

A smile spreads across Maleephas’s face. He leans against the wall and chuckles.

“And it only took how many eons and another fool to play Lucifer.”

I puff the Malediction and think.

“Maybe it’s not as bad as you think. I thought Samael was playing me for a chump when he blew town and left me this job. Maybe meeting you is what it’s all been about. Maybe he couldn’t face you or maybe he knew you wouldn’t want to see him. Maybe I’m here to blow up the myth. Let you out and remind everyone what really happened here.”

He turns his eyes toward me.

“Do you think he’s really that compassionate?”

The Malediction burns my throat in a good way.

“Weirder things have happened.”

Maleephas comes over to me, using his hand to fan away the smoke. He whispers.

“You know what I think? I think he did send you. But not for the kind of compassion you mean.”

I feel the knife slip under the bottom of the armor. Maleephas drives it in two, three times, twisting the blade and holding it in place.

“I think he sent you here as a sacrifice. He’s gone and is giving Hell back to me. I’ll burn Pandemonium to the ground. Henoch will be the new Hell and this will be Maleephas Lucifer’s palace.”

He pulls out the blade and pushes it back up under the sleeve of his robe. I fall to my knees. He kicks me. It is a small thing but already bleeding and stabbed, it still hurts.

“If it truly is so easy for Father to forgive Samael, then he was right and I was wrong. We’ll prove them both wrong by creating a brand-new Underworld. The hills outside of Henoch are rich in gold and silver. We’ll build an entire city of precious metals, so bright it will blind the archangels and over time they’ll come to worship us.”

“Fuck you, Mally puss. You’re as dumb as the twerps that fall for your picture show. You’ve started believing your own fantasies.”

He stands over me.