Page 51
We were both sweating visibly when the song ended.
"I guess their air conditioning isn't working so well in here," he said offering me his handkerchief. I thanked him and wiped my face. When I handed it back, he dabbed his own forehead. "It's probably cooler outside. Thanks for the dance," he said and returned to the stage to continue playing.
After the band took its break and sat down to have something to eat and drink. I joined Sarah.
"You guys sound great," I said.
"Thanks. You looked so hot out there before, dancing with Duncan. Everyone was envious, the girls of you, the boys of him."
I felt myself blush and glanced over at him. He looked at me across the table as if he was stealing a forbidden peek and quickly turned back to the girls who had surrounded him. He didn't make it a point to come over to talk to me afterward either: minutes later, he and the other band members were playing again. They played until the party came to an end this time. Our chaperones informed us it was curfew and the dance began to break up.
I glanced back at Duncan, who was putting his trumpet in its case and talking to Sarah. She laughed at something he had said, and then she quickly joined me at the door to return to our room.
"Have a good time?" she asked. "It was fun,"
I kept expecting him to say goodnight to me, but he continued talking music with the other band members.
If anything, his apparent restraint made me even more curious about Duncan Fields. He had seemed so interested in me at the beginning of the dance and we did have a good time when we danced, but after that, he hardly looked my way. I knew because I was continually looking at him and expecting the same.
"Did Duncan say anything about me?" I finally asked Sarah as we headed down our corridor.
"Uh-huh, but I told him you were going hot and heavy with someone from home who was coming to see you soon."
"Oh," I said.
She stopped and tilted her head.
"You sound disappointed. Should I have kept that a secret?"
"No," I said quickly. "You did the right thing."
She laughed.
"See?" she said, "See why I don't believe in soul mates?"
"I'm not upset," I insisted.
"Spewch." she muttered and plodded down to our room ahead of me.
I felt myself fuming inside, but it was more because of my comments and reactions than hers. I realized-- that both confused and angered me. When I set my head down on my pillow a little later after we had put out the lights. I lay there with my eyes wide open. I was only sixteen. I told myself. Why should I feel so much guilt about having fun with another boy? I liked Harley. I liked him even more than I had realized, but maybe we were rushing into things. Was I absolutely a horrible person for even having these thoughts?
Tossing and turning in bed, I even groaned aloud and expected Sarah to wonder why, but she had fallen asleep quickly. I could hear her heavy, regular breathing. She had her back to me and was tightly folded under her blanket, hugging her pillow as if it were her favorite teddy bear.
Then I heard what sounded like hail hitting the window. I turned curiously. Our window looked out on the east end of the dorm. Beyond the lawn was a small wooded area. There was no moon, but the sky had cleared and offered enough starlight to throw a silvery glow on the dark campus. I stared a moment. Just as I was about to turn away and try to get to sleep. I saw his head silhouetted in the window and heard the gentle tap.
My heart stopped and started. I looked at Sarah, but she didn't budge an inch. He tapped again. and I rose out of my bed and went to the window, squatting down to open it.
"Hi," Duncan Fields said.
"What are you doing here?"
"Couldn't sleep so I thought I'd pay you a visit. Sarah awake?"
I looked back at her. She was still very quiet, unmoving except for her regular breathing.
"No."
"Good," he whispered. "I really enjoyed dancing with you. I didn't want to make a pig of myself and ask you again."
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