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“To grovel and beg her forgiveness every day for the next fifty or sixty years,” I admitted.
“That’s a good plan. I approve,” she said.
37
LYDIA
Idon’t know how long I slept, but when I woke up it was still dark out, and there was a tiny little baby next to me. He was awake and his eyes were wide open. I don’t know if he could see anything yet, but that tiny little face peered out into the world. His little mouth moved as if he were experimenting with the new muscles in his face.
“Hi, baby,” I said quietly. “Where’s your daddy?”
Miles wasn’t anywhere. He wasn’t in bed, and he wasn’t sitting in the side chair.
I carefully and slowly climbed out of bed before picking the baby up. “What are we going to name you, little man?” I asked. I ran through our short list of names—Chris, Yul, Noel. They all felt a little bit foreign to my tongue.
I had publicly announced I didn’t care if I had a boy or a girl, and I wasn’t disappointed. I had a beautiful baby. But I had a list of girl names ready to go. I certainly hadn’t thought of what I would name a baby born on Christmas or Christmas Eve. Maybe givinghim a seasonal name wasn’t the smart move. But I did like the sound of those names, Chris, Yul, Noel. One of them would stick.
My stomach gurgled.
“Let’s go see if we can find something to eat,” I said as I carefully picked him up.
His food was easy enough, at least so far as we hadn’t run into any latching problems. It would take some time to get used to it for both of us, but so far, he was a pro at breastfeeding. My food, however, was in the kitchen on the other side of the inn.
I was stunned. I let out a little gasp when I stepped into the lobby. Opposite the fireplace, between two of the sitting chairs, a modest sized Christmas tree had been put up. The decorations weren’t anything fancy. They reminded me of the handmade ornaments and garlands that we had prepared for our little festival that never happened.
A Christmas tree. The lobby had been slightly rearranged to accommodate it. I looked down at the bundle in my arms.
“It’s our own little Christmas miracle,” I said to the baby.
Instead of making my way into the kitchen as planned, I headed over to the coffee setup. I stood there staring at the coffee maker. It took me a while to realize it wasn’t working because we didn’t have any power. It was just as well. I couldn’t imagine how I was going to carry the baby and a hot cup of coffee at the same time, something I knew I shouldn’t even think about doing. With a shrug, I grabbed one of the Danishes and ripped open the package so that I could at least have something to eat.
I carried my newborn son over to the couch and curled up in the corner so that I could hold him comfortably and gaze at thetiny little tree. It wasn’t a real tree. I had several artificial ones in storage in the basement. The thought of Miles venturing down there in the dark made my heart swell. He was here and he was going to take care of us.
I really hoped that I could trust him this time because I wanted nothing more.
I sat staring at the tree and eventually, the sky out beyond the large front window began to lighten. It was a while after that before Miles came downstairs.
“You’re awake,” he said.
“Did you do this?” I nodded toward the tree.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t find any ornaments.”
“You must have been up all night making the decorations.”
“I was. It’s a good thing you like sticky notes and have them in different colors. Those made the paper chains go together easily,” Miles said. “When I was little, we would make paper chains. Sometimes, we would even have popcorn and cranberry garlands. I thought about it, but I didn’t know how I was going to make popcorn, and I have no clue where to find a needle and thread in this place, or if you even have any. I did see some strings of lights downstairs, but with no way of testing them, it seemed pointless.”
“I don’t think the lights matter,” I said. “It’s not like we have power. It’s beautiful. Thank you.”
“It’s the least I could do,” he said. “After what you went through yesterday, I wanted to make today special for you. It didn’t seem right that for our baby’s first Christmas, he wouldn’t have a tree.”
“I wasn’t feeling very Christmassy,” I admitted.
“I’m afraid that’s probably my fault,” he said.
“I don’t have a present for you,” I admitted. “I don’t have any presents for him. He wasn’t supposed to be here for another two weeks.”
“I’m pretty sure this year, he’s the present. May I?” Miles reached out for the baby.