Page 74

The snowstorm was getting worse, and as the late afternoon progressed, it was starting to get dark. I worried he and Evie would somehow get snow blind and lost, even though the library was really only a block and a half away. Or maybe he would change his mind and drive off without me. Horrible scenarios raced through my head. I was scared. Thinking the worst wasn’t helping.
A new wave of contractions hit, and my moans turned into hard, panting breaths and cries of pain. This was not in my labor andbirth plan at all. I had wanted to be medicated. Screw having a natural birth.
It had never sounded comfortable, and it really wasn’t. I didn’t have anything I could take that would help. I wanted to be at the birthing center where they could stick a needle in my back and take this pain away.
I curled up and managed to hold on to the couch as another set of harsh contractions assaulted my body. These were so intense and so hard that I don’t think I could have pushed if I had wanted to. I didn’t even know if I should be pushing.
There was something inside me, and it felt like it was trying to claw its way out with razor sharp talons. The nature of the pain changed from constricting, dull, and achy. The pain almost had a shape. It was something with hard, rounded edges to something sharp and pointed.
My perception of reality began to twist. There was no part of my body that did not hurt. My hair hurt. I was delusional and barely registered when Evie and Miles came bursting back into the lobby.
I thought it must have been a dream. Evie hated Miles, but there they were together. She began barking orders to him, and he ran around, gathering everything. There was a frantic urgency to their actions.
“Hey, Lydia.” A cool washcloth brushed over my brow. “I guess the baby decided it wanted to show up for Christmas.”
“Evie?” Was that my voice? It was all slurred and raspy.
“Are you sure you want all these sheets out here? Don’t we want to move her into her bed?”
Miles was there. Miles had come back and we were going to be a family. This had to be a dream because Miles wanted to sue me for paternity. Why would he be here if he hated me?
“No, let’s get everything set up out here. It’s warm and there’s more room for us. This way, her bed is nice and clean for after the baby’s born. We won’t have to try to move her out of the bed to make it,” Evie was telling somebody.
“Smart call,” Miles said. Oh, right, he was here.
“Okay, Lydia, I know we’re best friends, but I’m about to see parts of you neither of us ever expected me to see, and I need you to be okay with that,” Evie said. “I’m going to have to be okay with that too.”
I think I whimpered something. I tried to focus, but the pain made everything hazy. Evie was in front of me with her hand on my knee.
I don’t know what Evie had planned. I knew that she seemed to have everything under control. Miles was listening to her. I was listening to her.
“Lydia.” She was talking to me again. She said something about taking off my clothes. “Miles, can you crank up the heat in here? I don’t want her to get cold.”
No, it was cold outside, and I needed to put on a coat so we could go. I was supposed to be having a baby at the birthing center, but instead, here I was, having a delusional dream while sitting in the lobby at the Sweet Mountain Inn.
“We should go to Ines,” I managed to say. I sounded drunk to my own ears.
Excessive amounts of pain tore through me. I screamed.
“Hey, hey, hey.” Suddenly, Miles was wrapped around me. His arms supported me, and he guided my head to rest back on his shoulder. “You’re doing really well. Lydia, keep going, darling.”
I don’t know how long he had been holding me. It felt good to have him supporting my body. Somehow, the comfort of his arms took away some of the pain, and there was so much pain.
I heard Evie somewhere off in the distance. “You’re gonna need to push now.”
Push. Push. Push. I don’t know what she meant. I lifted my arms and tried to push against the air, and then a contraction grabbed hold of my body and I curled in on myself. That’s what she meant by push. I screamed as I bore down.
“That’s it, Lydia, you got it. Push, honey.” Miles, still against my back supporting me, grabbed my leg and pulled my knee up.
Evie’s hands were suddenly on my stomach. “Stop pushing, Lydia. Just breathe. Just breathe.”
I followed every single one of her instructions.
She rested her hand against my stomach. “Time to push, Lydia,” she directed.
And then I was pushing again. With another scream that was more a primal roar, the tension and pain in my body seemed to literally slip away.
“I’ve got him. Oh, my God, Lydia, it’s a boy! It’s a boy!” Evie was crying.