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Story: Stained In Sin

His voice echoes through my head. I press my eyes shut, wanting to end the agony. When I open them, I stand in the middle of a field, surrounded by the smell of spring. The air smells of flowers and fresh rain.

I look around, seeing nothing but happiness. I hear the crack of a twig. I spin around and I see Dante holding a long, bloody knife. He stares at me blankly as he swings the blade back and forth.

He smiles at me for a second before his words cut through the air.

“I told you to run, princess. Don’t make me say it again.”

I turn to take off, but I run right into a mirror. The mirrors are all around me, like a maze. I walk forward and run into another.

“You can never escape me.” His warning comes before I feel a burning in my stomach.

I look down and see the mark he gave me, bleeding fresh blood. I look up into the mirror, panic gripping my chest.

“You will always bleed for me.”

I gasp for air as I sit up in my bed. Holy fucking shit. I look around my room, and everything is okay. I am okay.No, you’re not.

I get up and go into the bathroom to take some Advil. My ribs are still sore—my head throbs. My wound hurts, but it’s healing.

I slip back into bed, not wanting to do anything today. I have stayed in my room since he dropped me off. I came out only twice yesterday to eat, which I could barely do. I feel sick to my stomach. The disgust and shame that fill my body are torturous.

He said he had something to do yesterday. Which I assume had to do with Lacey. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. I threw up probably eight times yesterday, until nothing except bile came up.

I thought I was fine, but I’m not. I’m an emotional disaster. I turned my phone off yesterday morning, not wanting to face any form of reality. My parents came home yesterday, and I avoided them. I don’t want them to see what I have become.

What is bothering me the most is that he didn’t try to make any contact with me yesterday. I know my phone was off, but that certainly wouldn’t stop him. He acts like I don’t exist. Like he didn’t fucking cut me open. He is so hot, then cold. He says one thing, and his actions say another. He doesn’t make any fucking sense.You don’t make sense either. He hurts you, and you miss him. He makes you jealous, and you retaliate. You say you hate him, but you give yourself to him.

The pressure builds behind my eyes as I think about how fucked up I am. I remember when all of this was a fantasy. A fantasy that ended with me having my happily ever after. I was fucking wrong. The unwanted tearsfall.

I will never be happy. There will always be a fucked up part of me that likes the chaos. I will never be okay. He will always hurt me. He got what he wanted. He destroyed me.

I roll over and bury my head into my pillows. I can cry until I pass out again. At least when I’m sleeping, I don’t have to feel.

* * *

I wake up at 10 P.M. according to my wall clock. I managed to avoid leaving my room all day, but now I will be awake all fucking night.

I haven’t checked my phone at all in the last two days.Maybe you should. Perhaps he tried to call you.

I grab my phone from my nightstand and turn it on. My phone starts buzzing immediately. Dante sent me one message:

Don’t forget who you belong to.

Attached is an image of me lying on the forest floor, naked, bloodied, and ready for him. I swipe out of the message before tears gather in my eyes.

I have a message from Harmony:

Just call Astra back. She’s not okay.

I quickly navigate to Astra’s messages. I have 11 unread messages. Two were from the day Dante came to kidnap me:

Why aren’t you answering me?

You didn’t go back out last night, did you? Please tell me you are okay!!!

The subsequent messages are from last night.

Call me now… It’s urgent.