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“Crew?” he spat, his arm flying out motioning in the direction of where the rest of the group was. “I’m not just fucking crew, Kat,” he bellowed. “Who was the one who came to find you, stood by your side through all the ups and downs? Who watched you fuck your way through each port? Who always has your back?”

“So, you think you deserve sex for that?”

“Oh, my gods.” He gripped his head in frustration. “You are so daft. So single-minded in your lust to get Croygen that you can’t see anything else, even if you hurt those who love you the most. Don’t you want more than this?”

“Yes!” I spat. “That’s what I’ve been working toward. I want everything.”

“No, you want revenge. That’s not everything.”

“I want to live free, to experience life. To have wealth we never dreamed of, to have power, to have it all. To live by no one’s rules as we sail the seas. I’m tired of being broke, barely getting by day by day. Being some poor man’s wife or raising a family doesn’t interest me. I wantmore, Killian. I thought you did too.”

He jerked back like I punched him.

“I didn’t mean—”

“No. I get it. I’m not wealthy enough to love or fuck.”

“That’s not what I meant!”

“That’s exactly what you meant.” He took another step back from me, his expression tight. “I have loved you for so long, thinking one day you’d look up and see me. But no matter what, I was never going to be good enough for you…”

“Kill, that’s not true.”

“Your fixation on Croygen? It never went away, did it?”

“What does that mean?”

“It means you were pining after him when we were young and still are today. And not because you hate him. Shit, Kat, you stole his favorite leather coat and treat it as your most cherished possession.”

Even living on the street, that jacket was the one thing I held on to no matter what. A reminder of what he did, what I lost, and who I would avenge. I fantasized about when we finally battled face-to-face. I’d be wearing his coat, and he would understand the meaning as he died by my hand.

“I mean, he’s all you ever talk about, then and now.” Killian shook his head. “While I’ve been the poor pathetic boy running after you, hoping for any scraps you throw my way.”

“Killian… that’s not true at all.”

“Yes, it is.” He dipped his head like he had made a decision. “I can’t do this anymore.”

“Do what?” Panic fluttered up into my lungs.

“Be this guy.” He inched farther away from me.

“What? Be my friend?” My voice dropped in terror, feeling like the ground under my feet was being pulled away. I could always count on Killian. He was all I really had in this world anymore. “You are my family.”

“No, I’m the rug under your feet.” He shook his head. “I love you, Kat. So much. It’s why I have to leave.”

“What?” Terror pitched through me. “Don’t youdareleave! We can talk about this.”

“I’m done talking. I’m done watching from the sidelines.” He headed for the stairs.

“Killian?”

“One day you’ll come crawling to me, when I’m the one swimming in riches and power.” He paused on the top step. “Bye, Kat. Hope you find him, get all you dreamed of.” Killian went down the stairs, leaving me frozen in utter shock. The idea of Killian leaving me had never crossed my mind. Panic and terror bubbled up, running after him.

“Killian!” A sob racked through my vocal cords. “Killian!” I tore through the hollowed-out building, ignoring the rest of the crew by the fire pit, who peered at me with curiosity.

Could I love him? What if I tried?

I followed his scent, screaming his name. As fast as I was, Killian had learned to be faster, his powers sometimes astounding me.