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We had nothing. No leads, no clues, no nothing.

Being the captain came with lots of responsibility and with that, guilt and blame. Right or wrong, it all fell on my shoulders, and with Cooper and AB, I felt it was my fault even more.

“Pam is mad at you.” A voice jolted me out of my thoughts.

“Holy shit.” I jerked to see Sprig on my desk, holding up his girlfriend. A small stuffed goat named Pam. “You scared the crap out of me. How in the hell did you get in here?”

“I’m five inches, which, unlike what women probably tell you, is small. I can get in anywhere.” Sprig pushed Pam closer to me. “Apologize.”

“Get that fucking stuffed sheep out of my face.”

“How. Dare. You.” Sprig sucked in with a loud gasp, covering Pam’s ears. “Don’t listen to him, baby. You are not a sheep.” He glared, hissing at me. “You know I will hear about this for days. And she’s already mad at you.”

Snorting, I took another drink. “Okay, I’ll give… Why is the donkey mad at me?” Sprig had spent a lot of time alone in Rapava’s labs; his only friend then was a stuffed animal, a tiny bear he had to leave behind. To him, she and Pam were real. It was sad and adorable all at the same time.

Sprig sniffed, turning his back to me. “You’re right, Pam. He doesn’t deserve forgiveness after what he’s done.”

Setting down my glass, I watched him for a while, his tiny shoulders slouching with disappointment, digging at my cold, dead heart.

Groaning, I rubbed viciously at my forehead. “Okay, what do I need to apologize for?”

“Not talking to you,” Sprig huffed.

“Normally, that would make my day, gopher.” I poked at him. “But talk.”

Sprig circled back to me.

“For leaving.” I felt the stab instantly. “For hurtingBhean.” It was what he called Zoey, meaning woman. “Bebinn. Even the Viking, and… Pam.” Meaning him.

Emotion wound around my vocal cords. In my own pain, how many I had hurt when they were mourning too? Losing Lexie was devastating to them all. And then they lost me as well.

Swallowing the knot in my throat, I rubbed my thumb over the top of his head.

“I don’t say this often, or at all… I’m sorry, furball.”

“Not me you need to apologize to. I personally was happy you were gone.” He shoved Pam into my face again. “Apologize to her… like you mean it.”

I let out a light growl as I clenched my teeth, Sprig poking Pam into my nose.

“Nice and loud, boot humper.”

“Please, forgive me…” I gritted through every syllable, forcing out the last word like it might actually kill me. “Pam.”

Sprig tilted his ear to her mouth.

“She doesn’t believe you. Now again, but from the heart.”

“I’m going to use her innards as toilet paper,” I snapped.

“Someone is being a massive Viking.” In Sprig code, that meant asshole. “Pirates and Vikings aren’t all that different, I suppose.” He shrugged.

“But unlike Ryker, I don’t need my food separated. I can eat a goat and a monkey at the same time.”

“Don’t threaten us with a good time, pirate! We’re still mad at you.”

A groan pinched my lids together as a sharp knock thrummed my cabin door. “Enter,” I called out, downing another swig, trying to get all visuals out of my head, figuring it was Scot. I did a double-take when Cooper entered.

“Hey.” He peeked in. “Have a moment?”