Page 93

“And we thought he was dead!” Katie covered her mouth with her hands, giggling.

“Are you sure?” Linda asked, squinting, trying to see the driver.

“That cage thing’s top is covered in foil,” Travis pointed out.

“Oh, yeah, it’s Calhoun. ” Linda shook her head. “Old Crazy Calhoun. ”

A zombie scrambled up onto the side of the tractor and began to shake the cage. It suddenly stiffened, then tumbled over dead. Another zombie, an elderly woman, tripped and fell over a dog and immediately was trampled by the cows.

“I’m going to start picking off the zombies on the outer edge,” Katarina decided. There were at least a dozen struggling to get past the dogs and cows to Calhoun.

The sun was higher now, the mist rolling back as the grayish light of dawn filled the streets. The old man seated in the cage erected on the trailer was now visible as Calhoun, complete with a foil jumpsuit and cowboy hat.

Katarina and Linda began to steadily pick off the zombies as the tractor drew near. Calhoun began to slowly turn in front of the wall before the hotel. He noticed the people up on the wall and slowed down to shout up at them.

“Thems here dairy cows for milk and chickens for eggs. Nobody eats ’em or I keep driving,” he called out.

Katarina could now see the pet carriers tied to the flatbed trailer were filled with cats. They were snarling and hissing and not too happy.

Meanwhile, the little dog was still dragging around the zombie head while a bigger dog made attempts to steal it away.

“Okay, Calhoun, just get inside,” Travis shouted back.

With a salute, Calhoun shifted gears and the parade continued. “Leave that nasty ol’ head alone, Pee Wee, and get along little doggie,” Calhoun shouted.

The little black dog heard his master, hesitated, then lifted its leg, peed on the zombie head, then trotted after the rest of the dogs.

Katarina thought she would die laughing.

* * * * * Travis met Calhoun in the courtyard after the old coot successfully managed to get in the gate. The snipers on the walls had picked off the zombies mingling with his herd and all the dogs, cows, chickens, and cats were accounted for to the old man’s satisfaction.

“So you went for your animals,” Travis decided with a wry smile.

“Yep. Realized feeders were about empty,” Calhoun answered.

“I see. ”

“Figured we need fresh milk and eggs anyway,” Calhoun decided. “Keeps your brain sharp against the aliens. ”

“Yeah, right,” Travis said dubiously, staring at the grizzled old man in the foil jumpsuit.

“’sides, army has been circling my farm. Don’t need them taking my stuff,”

Calhoun said in a dire voice. “I don’t take kindly to martial law. I didn’t vote for that yokel in the White House. ”

“I think that yokel is dead,” Travis answered.

“And leading the messed up clone hordes? Their undead master? Damn!

It all makes sense now,” Calhoun decided grimly.

“So you saw the army?”

“Saw their helicopter flying around. Told you them folks were up to no good,” Calhoun said, and gave Travis a hard look.

“Yes, you did. ”

“Obeying their Amazonian overlords,” Calhoun sighed. “Well, anyway. I’m back. ”