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“Yeah, it truly is.” That’s when a sudden sadness comes over me. Who knows how long I will be able to be here? My mind races with thoughts of how I’m putting them in danger. I pray that Mitch just forgets I exist. But the chances of that are slim. He’s a vindictive asshole.
I catch Ryker staring at me.
His eyebrows pulled inward, “Hey, no frowning. Come on. Let’s go clean up the shop and shed.” Ryker leads the way back toward the buildings where we started our day, and I trail behind him, trying to rein in my emotions.
We start off in the shed, taking stock of the feed and what we need to go into town and get more of. We next organize the shed and sweep it out. This takes us a couple of hours but before we know it, we have everything organized and looking much better.
“Okay, so that’s pretty much how you deal with the shed. We do this a couple of times a week. We obviously never want to run out of feed, so this allows us to check the stock and keep this place organized.” He slaps his hand on a big plastic bag that contains horse feed in it.
“Okay, that seems easy enough.” I nod.
He points across the way towards the building we started at the ass crack of dawn in. “Let’s head over to the shop. I’ll show you how to deal with things in there. Putting away vehicles and stuff.” As we start to walk, he turns to me. “So, I think my brothers were excited to have you here working.”
“Sure, I guess.” I shrug. I pause for a moment while my thoughts take over. “Can I say something?”
“Always.” Ryker gives me his smile.
“You’re all like fucking Cabbage Patch dolls.”
Ryker busts out laughing, stopping dead in his tracks. “Cabbage Patch dolls?”
“Yeah. All of you look alike but the hair and eyes mix and match. Cabbage Patch dolls.” I grin back.
“I can honestly say that no one has ever said that about us, but I love it.” He holds the door open when we reach the shop after our short walk from the shed.
“Thank you.” I step over the threshold and take in my surroundings. There are work benches and shelving units that line the wall. Other Gators and vehicles they use to get around the ranch are missing, leaning a lot of empty space in front of the rollup doors. As I look around, I spot a coffee pot. “Does that work?” I ask Ryker as I point at it.
“Sure does. Want me to make some?”
Putting my hands together in a begging stance, I plead, “Please, pretty please.”
“Sure thing, darlin’.” Ryker walks over to the counter and reaches up to a cabinet above the coffee pot. He opens it, grabs a coffee canister and filter. Emptying the old filter into the trash he places the new one in. He heads over the sink next to it and washes out the pot and then fills it with water. Once he gets everything in their rightful place, he hits the brewing button and the dark liquid fills the glass pot.
Ryker hands me a steaming cup and I take a sip, moaning as the bitter heat goes through me.
Once we drink our coffee, we move around the shop, putting things away. Ryker shows me where the Gators and the four-wheelers go and how to pull them into the shop to make sure they get them all in every night.
We then move to cleaning up around the shop, where tools go and what tools are what, and he explains what each one does.
“Want a water?” Ryker asks as I hang up the broom I was using to sweep up.
“Actually, yes. That would be great.” I nod as Ryker walks over towards the fridge.
I’m hanging up a wrench when I hear a loud sigh come from Ryker and I turn my head towards him. “Shit. Let me go run and grab some more from storage. We’re out.” He closes the fridge and runs out of the shop.
I jump onto the counter and look around. Just when I start to feel comfortable, I begin to feel bad. Ryker used his day off to show me around and show me the ropes of some of the things they do on the ranch. He didn’t have to. There’s no reason for him to be this nice to me.
Everything’s so new to me. It makes me feel so lost. Watching how much they all support each other, how much they all love each other, it makes me wish I had the same. I mean, Ryker moved back home to support his mom and family while she beat the cancer. They are so close, so full of love for each other. I’m a little jealous.
I lower my head into my hands and start to cry. Tears stream down my face. I’m so lost in my sadness that I don’t even hear Ryker come in and over to me.
“Zo? What’s wrong?” I startle when he comes up and touches me. He holds his hands up innocently. “Just me, Zo. What’s going on?”
I shake my head and put my hand over my heart. “I hurt. My heart hurts. I’m lost and alone. I don’t even know who I am anymore.”
Ryker’s expression softens. “Sweetheart, you’re not alone.” His hand comes up and wipes away the tears on my face.
“I am, though. Watching all of your family together, this town, everyone supports everyone. I’ve never had that. Every day, I’ve had to be my own support, my own family. I had to learn how to live by myself.”