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Although I smelled coffee in the kitchen, at least Saul wasn’t beside me in the bed, and I staggered out, my thighs aching, and went into the bathroom.

Defiantly, I popped open my birth control pack and grabbed a pill.

Wait, had they always tasted like this?

I was too furious to notice.

He was wrong.

Iwasgood.

So what if Ididoccasionally have impure thoughts? Praying to Nimhe would help that.

But the Eye knew all. And he knew that I had taken some sort of sick, wrong pleasure in rubbing my cunt on Saul, in seeing him between my thighs.

I didn’t understand it but there it was.

Saul was so stoic, but something about how he had grunted, something about how those cold eyes had sharpened as he looked at me. . .had given me a tiny bit of power.

I just had to find a way to escape him before the week was up. Because at the end of the week he’d want to stick that cock that had barely fit in my mouth deep in my cunt and that couldnotbe allowed to happen.

Of course I wanted babies. I wanted to have a lot of children.

But not withhim.

My mouth was still sore, my throat feeling raw from how long he had forced me to suck his cock.

But after he had fed me soup yesterday, he had allowed me to fall asleep so, even though my dreams had been uneasy, unsettling, I hoped he would keep his promise.

My throat felt dry as I pulled on leggings and a T-shirt.

Why was it so hard to escape him?

Yes, men were always kind to me at church, but I’d assumed that was because we were all brothers and sisters in the Sight of the Eye, and not because of how I looked.

Didn’t my worth rest in how Eye-blessed I was? Wasn’t that how I thought I’d find a husband?

But only Saul knew how I had acted in the dark and he still wanted me.

I crossed my arms across my chest, realizing with a start that even with my modest garb, my breasts and ass were very visible.

If I could somehow use this to my advantage. . .maybe I’d have a chance to escape.

I just needed some way to keep Saul from chasing me so I could escape, because I had absolutely no doubt that if I ran, he’d hunt.

And, suddenly, I had an idea.

There was a chest of my grandfather’s old things in my closet and I knew exactly what item I could use.

It was old, but it looked heavy and metallic. It would work.

Taking a deep breath, I walked out the door of my bedroom and into my small kitchen, with its lovely old-fashioned cabinets and wood stove.

“Dr. Meier was right,” I said. “Iamnothing but a common whore.”

Saul rotated around from where he had just placed a plate of what smelled like bacon, eggs, and toast on the table, sitting down in a chair at the head of the table and facing me.

“Gracie, stop this bullshit and sit down and eat your food.”