Page 74 of Redd

Before I felt empty, because I didn't have her. I felt weaker, because I didn't have her. Now, I was stronger than I had ever been—because I had everything I needed right here in this woman.

Running the back of my fingers down her cheek, I traced her throat. She looked so beautiful, so pure and exotic.

Her hair was wild, wisps tangled with locks, framing her sharp cheek bones. Big brown eyes bled with emotions, new and old, mingling with each other in silence. Parting her lips, she blinked slowly, swallowing hard as the pads of my fingers moved down her skin.

Hard nipples pressed my side as her chest engorged with a lung full of air, and her skin flushed pale pink. “Don't hurt me, Redd.” Her eyes pleaded for a sanctuary, for a place free of pain and suffering. “I don't think I could handle it.”

Swooping her up into my arms, I guided her legs around my lap, and held her hips. “I would never hurt you.” Squeezing the sharp bones at her waist, I dug my fingers into her skin. “Not now, not ever.”

Bijou smiled, her face lighting up with relief. “That's all I need to know.”

Cupping her cheeks, I tugged her down, bringing her nose to mine. “Don't ever doubt me, my word means everything.”

Dancing her eyes around my face, she rolled her lips. “Do you think you'll ever want to share your past with me?”

“It's not that I don't want to share it. I just don't know how to say it and not make you hate me.” Dragging my fingertips up and down her back, I watched her.

“I don't want to push you to tell me, but I can't stop feeling like I need to know why you would take someone's life. I understand Val, I don't question that at all. But why before, what would drive you to do that?” Hanging her head, her hair fell over her face, hiding her from view.

Brushing her hair back, I took in a long breath. “Knowing isn't going to help you, Bijou. I want you to know me, who I really am.”

Slipping off my lap, she traced the long scars on her thigh. “Diablo did this.” Twisting so I could see her back, she pointed her finger over her shoulder. “All these.” Holding out her palm, she spread her fingers wide. “And this.” Dropping her hands against her legs, she angled her head to look at me. “You can see my scars. I can't see yours. Tell me who you killed, Redd, just give me that.”

Flaring my nostrils, I rocked my jaw side to side. I hadn't spoken about it for years. Not with Vicki, not with anyone.

I wanted Bijou to trust me, and telling her what I had done, I wasn't sure that would help either of us.

Give her what she wants, Redd. Let her decide what to do with it.

She was either going to accept it or hate me. But I wouldn't be able to hide it forever. It always had a way of finding me. No matter how much I tried, I couldn't get rid of it.

Forcing my tongue to form the words, I let them go.

“I killed my father, Bijou.”