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“Christian,” I scoff. “Do you really think nobody knows?”
“Has Hunter said anything to you about it?” she asks with a deep-seated look of worry in her eyes.
“There’s been a lot going on, Lena. The last thing that Hunter and I have discussed is your love life.”
Ugh, that came out meaner than I intended.
“I’m sorry. You’re right.” She stands and clears her dishes, clearly hurt. I feel bad that I’ve made her feel as if she needs to leave.
“I’m sorry. I’m in such a shitty mood lately. I apologize. Nobody tells you at the obstetrician’s office how pregnancy can and will affect your mood. Please sit back down. Tell me more about Christian.”
“It’s silly really. I'm talking about one of my brother’s friends as if anything could ever happen between us.”
“Why do you say that?”
“He thinks of me as a little sister, and then there’s the whole Hunter factor. Even if I thought Christian liked me a little, Hunter would never allow it to happen.”
“You and I are practically the same age, and so are Hunter and Christian. What’s the difference?”
“You know there’s a difference. I’m his best friend’s little sister. I wouldn’t be worth the risk.”
“Then what are we talking about the possibility for? If that’s how you feel about yourself, then why bring it up?”
“Megan, you're being so mean! I bring you home a delicious dinner and ask for your advice and this is what you say to me?”
“Listen, girl, I’m pregnant. I broke off my engagement. And I was kidnapped by my best friend’s father. I have zero fucks to give about anything but this baby growing inside me. If you are attracted to Christian, tell him. If he reciprocates those feelings, explore them. If Hunter has some shit to say about it, fuck him. Life is too short not to live it how you want.”
“And you want to live your life raising this baby on your own without Hunter?”
“Hell no! This is not what I wanted at all, Lena. I love your dumb ass brother, but I will not be controlled by his inability to trust anyone or anything but himself.”
“He’s had a hard life, Megan.”
“Who hasn’t!”
“He said and perhaps did some things in a moment of fear, and fear is not an emotion he is used to navigating. He doesn’t have many emotional attachments, but you are one of them, maybe the only one, and it frightens him.”
“Well–”
“If you don’t forgive him, I’m afraid of what he’ll do next. This whole thing with Naomi’s father is far from over. You know that. And I’m afraid of the decisions he’ll make if you are not around. You know what he’s capable of. Look at poor Parker.”
With everything going on between Hunter and me, not to mention this uncomfortable period of my pregnancy, I haven’t thought about Parker in days.
“What’s wrong with Parker?”
Lena’s face turns a shade of pale grey.
“I shouldn’t have said that.”
Her reaction reminds me of the argument between Hunter and me. It only escalated when I brought up Parker’s name. Maybe his guilt over something is why he started acting irrationally.
“Is he dead, Lena?” I ask the painful question, the one I should have had strength enough to ask Hunter myself.
“Dead? Oh no.”
“Then what’s wrong with him? Where is he?”
“I shouldn’t have mentioned it. I’m not supposed to know.”