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“Nothing. I was just saying how good he is for you.”
“He would be good for you, too, if he didn’t think you hated him.”
“Hey, I do not hate him.”
She shot me a challenging look and turned back to the kid, giving him kisses and telling him how precious he was. It was all a bunch of bullshit. That kid giggled and smiled for her, but the moment she was gone, that kid did his best to terrorize me.
“There you go,” she smiled. “All better.”
She shot me a scolding expression. “Do you think you can put his diaper on? Or would that be asking too much?”
I smiled at her, though I was trying really hard not to snap. “Of course, baby. Anything for you.”
She smiled sweetly and tossed the dirty diaper in the diaper pail. “Thanks, baby,” she said mockingly.
As she strolled out of the room, I walked closer to the table and stared down at the little guy. “So, it’s just you and me again.”
The giggling face he had just worn for Cara was now replaced with a scowl. I grabbed the diaper, preparing to put it on him when piss shot out of his little prick and nailed me right in the face. I just barely closed my mouth in time. When he was finally done, which felt like forever, I grabbed a wipe and carefully washed down every inch of my face. Staring down at him I asked, “Are you finished?”
He burst into laughter, then proceeded to shoot shit out of his ass and all over my hand.
After taking the demon child to daycare, I headed into Cap’s office, ready to hash things out. Unlucky for me, Maggie was there also, and she looked like she wanted to devour him whole. I turned around just as I was about to enter, but wasn’t fast enough.
“Sinner!” Cap practically shot out of his chair to get to me.
“I was just leaving.”
“No, we need to talk.”
I slowly turned around and glanced at Maggie. “Alone?”
“Yes, company business,” he said, lifting his brows at me.
“Oh, of course.”
He wrapped his arm around her waist and kissed her hard. “I’ll be watching you, Freckles.”
“Yeah, I know,” she sighed, marching past me out of the room. I barely moved before she shoved me into the wall. Apparently, it was my fault he sent her away.
“So, what’s the company business?”
“Shut the door,” he said seriously.
Now I was a little worried. I did as he asked, not at all surprised when he hit the shades and the switch to make the room soundproof. Sitting down in front of him, I prepared for the worst.
His brows furrowed as he stared at me. “We’ve been through a lot, you and me.” I nodded. “And…hell, we’re practically family. We do everything together.”
“Right,” I said slowly.
“I want you to know that there’s no one in the world I trust more than you. If it weren’t for you, I probably wouldn’t even have Maggie in my life right now, scaring us all with her pregnancies.” He cleared his throat and continued. “Which is why this is so hard for me to do.”
I sat upright, staring at him in shock. “You’re firing me? Boss, after everything I’ve done for you! I’ve seen your wife’s vagina!”
“Wait—”
“Is that what this is about? Because I gotta tell ya, it did nothing for me. I’m a one pussy man and that is not the pussy I wanna be stuck with for the rest of my life!”
“I don’t think you have a thing for my wife,” he snapped.