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After the last, I turned and saw him. He was holding the whip as if longing to get another blow in.

“It’s done,” I said. “You got your pound of flesh. Don’t push it and find out howuncontrolledI can really be.”

I held my shirt to my chest as I walked away, not because I was trying to show my back, but because the thought of anything touching it, even a scrap of material, might make me drop to the ground and break. I wouldn’t fall. I’d make it into the house, into my room, before I fell apart.

“Do you need my help?” Luisca was by my side before I’d gone more than five steps.

“No. I can make it, and I’d rather not let them think I can’t.” Walking from that field might’ve been one of the hardest things I’d ever done. Each step was excruciating.

“You’ve got this,” she said. Her hand hovered close, as she barely contained the urge to help me.

As soon as we got closer to her house, behind the privacy of some shrubs and out of sight of all the onlookers, I stopped walking. “Help me get my shirt on. I don’t want the girls to see my back.”

She nodded, taking my shirt out of my hands and trying to get it back over my head.

“Okay, I’m ready.”

She opened the door, but not in a way where it was obvious I needed her to.

The girls came running out of the kitchen as soon as they heard us.

“You’re okay?” Chelsie asked.Marina was clinging to her side.

“I’m fine. See?” I held out my arms, trying to keep the stiffness out of my movements. I must’ve hidden it well enough to be passable, because they both nodded, although not enthusiastically.

“We made you tea,” Marina said.

“Maybe we should have tea a little later,” Luisca said.

The hesitant acceptance on the girls’ faces was quickly disappearing. Marina looked as if she were going to cry again.

“No, I can have some tea,” I said.

“Okay, then. I guess we’re having tea.” Luisca sighed and then ushered the girls into the kitchen.

I sat on the chair, careful not to lean and keeping my back to them, as I could feel the trickles of blood and knew stains would be showing soon. I’d thought I’d be able to save this shirt, but I was fairly certain I’d throw it into the fireplace. I didn’t want to see a constant reminder of this day.

“Did you two do your chores yet?” Luisca asked, her voice more brittle than normal.

“No,” Chelsie said.

“It’s getting late. I think you both better get going,” Luisca said. I could see her shoulders sag as she leaned against the counter.

They nodded and left, looking more at ease than they had a few minutes ago.

Luisca got up, grabbing my arm to help me. “I appreciate your doing that for the girls, but it’s time you lie down.”

She helped me up to the room after the girls had gone outside, then helped me pull off the shirt that had begun to stick to my back. I climbed facedown onto the bed.

“I’m going to get some salve.” She stopped, pointing at me. “Don’t you move. No one, not even the toughest of us, would imagine you’d be up again soon.”

I must’ve really put on a good show if she thought I’d get up. Even lying still, I wanted to cry, but refused, knowing that Luisca was coming back. The only thing I was capable of was lying here, feeling like my entire back had been ripped apart.

Luisca returned, sitting on the edge of the bed beside me. “This is a numbing cream. It won’t fix it, but it’ll make it bearable.”

“Thank you,” I said, holding the moan I wanted to let out with every touch.

Luisca sighed. “I know you were trying to keep the peace, but once Kaden sees this, there won’t be any peace at all.”