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Oh, I was worried, but not because I thought it wouldn’t be enough. It might be too much. Anything would be. Our new life was not one either of us was looking to celebrate. It was something to be undone or endured at best.

Luisca waved to some of the other women, who all rushed over, as if they knew something was afoot.

“Billie and Kaden had to leave Nowhere so quickly that they didn’t have time for an esposmata. We’ll be throwing them one tomorrow.”

The women practically squealed in delight and hugged me, as if I would be at least as happy as them. This commotion only drew over more people, who were just as excited. I wasn’t sure if it was about the esposmata or the party. Some of these people had been shooting me wary glances just a day ago. How quickly they’d forgotten I might be a monster in their midst, and all for a good time with some meat and ale.

I spent the rest of the day trying to avoid speaking. It was too difficult to keep a conversation going with what was weighing on me, and the longer the day went on, the worse I was holding up, becoming a mute by the end.

Luisca was too busy bustling about, pointing at tasks, to care.

I barely made it to that evening without cracking, pacing the bedroom, waiting for him.

He finally made it to the bedroom.

“What exactly is this thing we’re doing? What is an esposmata? How does everyone here know about these things but me? Why didn’t you say something?”

He stood there kicking off his boots, calm in the eye of my current storm. He tugged at his shirt in a leisurely manner, as if he didn’t realize I was going to switch from pacing to scaling the walls in a few seconds.

“It’s a ceremony to celebrate our mating.” He tossed his shirt onto a nearby chair.

“I figured out that part. Why did you agree?” I ran my hand through my hair so hard I lost a few strands.

“I couldn’t say no after they knew we hadn’t had one.”

If he shrugged again, I was going to take a log to his shoulders.

“I didn’t know what an esposmatawas. Maybe you should tell me things? Now I need more details.”

“It’s a ceremony. Nothing too dramatic. We’ll say some words, there’ll be a feast afterward, and then we’ll go back to our room.” He shed the rest of his clothing and stood there utterly naked, as if there was nothing amiss with this situation.

Ceremony, feast, then off to the honeymoon suite. They might call it esposmata here, but there was a well-known term for it on Earth.

“This sounds like a wedding. Are you saying we’re getting married tomorrow?”

“I guess it’s similar to a human wedding.” He walked over to his side of the bed, dropping down, putting an arm behind his head and yawning.

“I can’t marry you all willy-nilly. Thatmeanssomething to me.” We just found out we were getting hitched, and he was about to nod off?

“You’re worried aboutmarryingme? Now?” he asked, and then shook his head like I was insane.

“Of course I am.” At least his lower body was covered, if barely. I could still see the top of his hips and…

There was something seriously wrong with the way I was becoming transfixed on his body.Stop lookingthere.

“You realize we’re mated, right?” He yawned again, closing his eyes.

“That’s different. I didn’t know what I was doing.” If there had been an instruction packet that came with that seed, and for some reason I’d decided to read it, I might not have done that either.

“Yes, I know, but what you did unknowingly is worse than marriage because it’ll take a miracle to undo it. Your marriages mean nothing to most humans, and this won’t be an issue either.”

“A marriage means something to me.” I’d spent my entire life thinking about how I’d build a family, a real one. I’d create what I’d never had growing up. I hadn’t realized it myself until this moment that, in spite of all the crazy things that had happened to me since, a piece of that dream had hung on.

“And a mating bond means something to me, but things happen,” he said.

His eyes were still closed, so I couldn’t see the condemnation in them—but I could feel it.

I’d stolen his future, and ruined mine along with it. The ceremony might mean something sacred to everyone else here, but it would mean nothing to either of us. We were a charade, imposters that would be celebrated tomorrow, and I’d have to live with that.