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“I’m not ready,” I whisper, but they both ignore me as Georgetta practically shoves me out of the room. That’s when I notice that she’s got her hair styled and she’s wearing makeup. She also has on a deep purple dress with a plunging neckline.

I was so nervous about getting married that I didn’t think to ask her howshewas doing. I didn’t think to take any time to see if she was okay or if she was ready for the ceremony.

It appears that she is, in fact, ready.

“Georgetta?”

“We’re going to get your hair all fixed up,” she tells me.

“You’re going to look like a princess,” Eduardo smiles. Learning closer to me, he tells me in a friendly way, “if I’m being honest, you already do!”

I look up sharply at him. There is nothing sexual between Eduardo and me. I don’t think of him in that way, and I know he sure as hell doesn’t think of me like that. Still, his comment surprises me. Perhaps it’s because Ian isneverso sweet with me. He’s always really rough and a little mean and...

Am I really comparing Georgetta’s boy-toy with Ian?

I steal a glance at Georgetta, but she doesn’t look jealous or upset. She just nods and smiles.

“You really do like a princess,” she says. “Come on.” She takes my hand and leads me down the hall to one of the other bedrooms. To be honest, I haven’t explored the house nearly as much as I should have, so I don’t really know what’s in all of the rooms in the house. When we walk into this particular room, I notice that it’s got a beautiful vanity set up in the center of the room and there’s a lady standing there who has a big ol’ smile on her face.

“You must be Rose,” she says. “You look beautiful. Come, have a seat.” She gestures to the little stool in front of the vanity and has me sit down. I say nothing as she quietly styles my hair and applies makeup to my face, shoulders, and chest. Yes, she puts stuff on my collar bone and my cleavage. “He’ll like it,” she tells me when I look confused.

“I’m sure he will.”

I wonder if Ian has given this lady specific instructions for how to deal with me. Did he come up with a plan for how he wants me to look and act today? I’m guessing that he did. It’s so strange to me that he’s not here this morning, but I suppose it doesn’t really matter.

My stomach rumbles as the lady is working on me. She hears it and chuckles.

“I’m guessing nobody fed you today,” she tells me quietly. Georgetta and Eduardo are speaking quietly by the door. They aren’t paying attention to us.

“No,” I tell her. “I haven’t eaten.” From the looks of things, I won’t be eating for some time – probably not until after the wedding. It’s okay, though. Skipping breakfast isn’t going to kill me. Even if I don’t get to start the day off with a delicious mocha or a pumpkin spice latte, I’ll be okay.

“Do you want me to sneak you a cookie?” The lady starts curling a strand of my hair, but her eyes are on me. She’s trying to be discreet, I realize. Maybe she’ll get in trouble if she gives me food. Yikes. I definitely don’t want that, so I fake a smile.

“I’m okay, but thank you for thinking of me.”

“If you change your mind...”

Her voice trails off and she gets back to work on my hair. I’m quiet for the rest of the session. Instead of speaking or making small talk, I just sit with my eyes closed and wonder what my mother would think if she was alive today.

Would she think I looked pretty?

Would she be proud of me?

A tear slips down my cheek before I can stop it.

“Oh shit,” the lady says. “Hold on, honey, your eyes are watering. Blink a few times for me. We don’t want the makeup to smear.”

“I’m so sorry,” I whisper, and I look up at her. She smiles gently and dabs at my eyes. We both know my eyes aren’t watering because of the makeup. We both know I’m crying about the wedding, but she’s protecting me from Georgetta and Eduardo by not saying anything, and for that, I’m grateful.

“You’re going to be a beautiful bride,” she tells me.

“Thank you.”

“You must be excited.”

I don’t say anything for a long time because I’m not really sure.Excitedisn’t a word I would use to describe what’s happening here today.Excitedis a word people who get to choose their wedding days would use. People who get to decide who to invite or where to hold the ceremony might feel that kind of exuberance, but not me.

I don’t feel anxious, I realize, but I don’t really feel happy, either. To me, this wedding day feels more like a task on a to-do list. I’ll go to the ceremony and I’ll make the promises. I’ll smile and wave. I’ll schmooze if there are other people there. I’ll play the role of a beautiful bride.