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She rushed back to her mother’s room, but when she got there, she was already asleep. She gave her a kiss,stroking her hair back off her forehead. ‘I’ll be back soon. I promise.’
The sound of a fist banging against a table broke her daydreaming; she was no longer on her own. She unfolded her legs, leaning forward so she could see around the corner of the U-shaped room, to where the noise was coming from. She was surprised to see Cutler and Annalise at one of the tables, although Annalise jumped up.
‘You can’t be serious?’
‘Keep your voice down,’ said Cutler.
‘So it was all for nothing. You lied to me!’
‘I didn’t lie. I did it for you. For us.’ He reached out and touched her arm, with a tenderness that shocked Olivia. She pulled away, not wanting to see any more, feeling second-hand shame.
Now it became clearer why Annalise had been chosen for the trip. It seemed a bit bold to bring your mistress on a cruise with your family. She could hear an even louder kerfuffle, and she caught sight of Annalise’s dark hair as she stormed past the lounge windows.
Olivia felt a pull in her stomach, as she looked at how stricken her roommate appeared. She put down her tea and followed her out of the lounge. But it wasn’t Annalise she saw. It was Patty. She was on the outer deck, staring at the passing waves.
‘Everything OK?’
‘Oh, just being an old softie. Missing Karl. He would have loved to be here.’
She moved to stand next to her, leaning against the railing. ‘Annalise told me about your husband. I’m very sorry.’
Patty sniffed. ‘He worked too hard. To the bone. He didn’t go to the doctor until it was too late – the cancerwas too widespread. He’s in a better place now, but our Pioneer branch was his baby. It’s been a tough few years but Cutler won’t let us go adrift; I’m sure of it. Look at the job he’s done with this cruise ship. I’m already looking forward to selling it to my clients.’
It won’t be owned by Pioneer then, thought Olivia. But then maybe that didn’t matter. If that’s what was needed to save his company and keep the branches open, then he was doing the right thing.
Olivia thought about what she’d just seen between Annalise and Cutler. Whether Cutler always did the right thing, she wasn’t so sure.
‘You seem to be feeling better,’ Patty said. ‘Got more colour in your cheeks now.’
‘Yes, it’s easy to forget your troubles when you’re surrounded by scenes like this.’ She gestured at the landscape slipping past the ship.
Patty nodded. ‘And no more scares, like after that first night?’
She shook her head. ‘Nothing so far. I wish Aaron would email again.’
‘He probably doesn’t want to interrupt your fun.’
‘Hmm.’ But he wasn’t the only one. Pierre hadn’t replied, nor Tricia. Pierre, perhaps that was to be expected. But Trish? Had she really messed up their friendship so badly that Tricia wouldn’t even reply to an email from the bottom of the world?
She’d gone to the library to try again that morning.
Trish – I am very sorry for what happened between us before I left. I was in a very dark place, but it’s no excuse for how I behaved.
I didn’t tell you in my last email, but Aaron isn’t here with me. He missed the boat somehow – he got caught up in a work emergency. Don’t worry, we will have words when I get off the ship.
The internet is apparently going to get even worse the further south we get – we should be crossing the Antarctic Circle tomorrow.
I miss you. Truly. And once again – I’m sorry.
OJCxx
She had tried to picture what Tricia would be doing when she received the email. It would have been late afternoon UK time, and Trish had probably come in from her lunch break, tackling tasks for Lisa. Trish always worked hard but maintained a balance. Why had that been so hard for Olivia?
She’d been so afraid of letting go of her vice-like grip on her career. Qualifying, making partner, gaining financial independence – it had loomed so large in her life that giving it up had seemed impossible. She realized now how ridiculous it had been to hold on so tightly to a workload and job that had almost killed her.
The truth was, she hated letting people down. Her boss, her clients. She absolutely couldn’t let her mum down. She’d flaked on responsibility once in her life, and the consequence had been catastrophic.
Patty tapped her hand. ‘I bet there’s an issue with the internet. Even Annalise said she was having trouble. I don’t know how all those young influencer types cope with it,’ said Patty. ‘Even Janine looked like she was so frazzled she couldn’t get online to post; I had to buy hera drink just to calm her down! But you must be excited for the showcase and midnight sun party tonight?’