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“I feel like my house is now tainted. I know that must sound silly, but this was my safe space, my comfort zone, after I left Jared. This is where I started my life over and now that he’s been hereand destroyed my things, I don’t look at it the same anymore.”
I nod. “I can understand that.”
“That’s why I wanted to come over here today and deep clean it. I need to remove all thoughts of Jared being in here.”
I look at her with sincerity in my eyes. “I’ll do whatever it takes to make you feel safe. Whether it is here, at my house, or the studio.”
Her gaze moves downward to my chest. “To be honest, I don’t know if I will ever feel safe here again, and that thought scares me. Jared ruined this house for me. It will never be the same.”
She climbs off my lap. “Alright, I’ve had a long enough break. Time to get back to work.”
She grabs the cleaning spray and the roll of paper towels and starts cleaning the shelf that she cleared off.
I grab the other bottle of cleaning spray and wipe down the mantle.
When we finish the living room, I head into the kitchen to wipe down the rest of the counters and clean out the refrigerator while she heads down the hallway towards the bedrooms.
Grabbing the trash can, I toss out all the old food that Staci has in storage containers. I dump out the spoiled milk and toss the jug into the trash can.
The old produce that has wilted and started to grow moldy gets tossed as well.
Using a disinfectant wipe, I clean the shelves inthe refrigerator before washing the storage containers.
My thoughts keep replaying Staci’s voice.
‘It will never be enough.’
No matter what I do or how much we clean, this house will have constant reminders of what her ex-husband did.
If she wants to have a safe, comforting, and secure space again, she has no other choice but to find some place else.
A thought runs through my mind.
When I am finished washing the dishes, I walk towards the bedrooms to find Staci.
“Staci?” I call out to make it easier to find her.
She calls back. “I’m in my room.”
Her voice is strained and full of emotion, as if she has been crying non-stop since coming in here.
Walking into her master bedroom, I see her sitting on the edge of her bed, crying.
Her cheeks are red, and her eyes are puffy.
I kneel in front of her. “What can I do?”
I’m desperate to help.
My heart can’t stand to see her so upset.
I want to comfort her and take her far away to make things better and at the same time I want to go out and look for Jared and give him a piece of my mind.
And maybe my fist.
But I know that won’t help Staci.
Staci doesn’t speak, her gaze stays locked onto her lap.