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It goes on about the same. He records his and Gray’s antics sneaking into the swimming pool at the senior center after hours, sneaking into the high school to steal a test.

All of these stunts sound masterminded by Daniel Harris. Gray was never much of a troublemaker. It’s not until I get to the end that I read a passage that stops me.

Dad says to keep him away from Drew, but Gray is one of the best guys I know…

My breath catches, and I flip back a page. Scanning quickly, the words make my heart beat faster as I read them.

He believes she was i

n love with Mack Cole and planning to leave with him. He says Mack comes from money back East. I don’t believe that. Why would he work in a filthy garage in this little town?

My jaw drops, and my hands begin to tremble.

As I dig deeper, I learn my father suspected my mother of having an affair with Gray’s uncle.

“Oh my God…” The words slip out on a hiss. “It’s why he always hated him.”

Taking a deep breath, I lean my head back against the side of the bed, doing my best to calm my racing pulse. I never knew about any of this. Did Gray know?

Flipping ahead, I see the letter M and stop.

…Mack’s garage today. He claims it’s a lie. He shouted at me it was worthless gossip. He was so angry, I think I believe him. He said Mom only tried to comfort him when he wanted to give up. That sounds more like it. Dad’s drunk. The Cole’s don’t have any money. And Gray is still my best friend. He’s the best guy I know.

“Gray…” I look up where my phone sits on my bed.

I want to show him this. I want him to know how my brother really felt. Maybe it would help him heal. I’d do anything to take that dark look out of his eyes.

Pushing off the floor, I stuff the journal in my purse. Now I have two things to show Gray when he gets back. If he ever comes back.

Grabbing my phone I send one more text.

Me: I’m still waiting. Please come home. Let’s heal together.

“Remember what happened the last time you went on a date?” Ruby is wrapping her hair around the barrel of a curling iron, creating huge curls.

“Oh, no. I’d rather die than call Ralph again. Not only did I have to put up with him, I had to put up with his mother.”

“But the night turned out really hot…” She sing-songs.

Only because Gray was in town, I mentally add, thinking how that was almost six weeks ago, thinking about the date of my last period. This morning I looked at my calendar, and I’ve been chewing my lip ever since, debating whether I should stop by a drugstore, trying to figure out what to do if I’m right.

“What are you thinking?” Ruby is like a hawk watching me.

My eyes flicker down to the glossy pages of the Teen Vogue in front of me. “I’m wondering why the hell you’re still getting Teen Vogue. Are you having a crisis I should know about?”

She turns to the mirror again, lifting another lock of glossy, raven hair around the straight curling iron. “I thought it might help me relate to my younger clients. You know. Knowing about what they’re interested in? Plus I love those cute shoes. And look at that little dress!”

“You can’t wear these clothes. You’ll look ridiculous.” Although, as I say it, with her petite figure, she could probably get away with all of these styles.

Turning to face me, she rakes her fingers through her new waves.

“That looks really good on you.”

“Really?” Her head whips back to the mirror, and the way she starts swishing it back and forth, making faces, almost makes me laugh.

It’s the oddest thing. Ever since I found Danny’s journal, I’ve had this unexpected flood of hope. Gray still hasn’t replied to my texts, but I feel like a cosmic shift has occurred. It’s like for the first time in my life, the universe is conspiring to help me. Like it might be okay if…

“I was thinking maybe I’d get that surgery done on my eyes.” She pulls the corners of her eyes wider. “You know, to make them rounder?”