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Knox raised an amused eyebrow. “What, did you wash your mouth with soap or something? What’s the word you’re looking for? Sex? Fucking? Coitus?”
“Lovemaking.”
Knox went speechless and wide-eyed. His grip on me tightened, holding that tether. Then his expression looked almost pained. “Caroline, there’s something…”
I jolted up, grinding my ass against him, making him slick. My core was still pulsing, and I needed release now.
Knox then looked annoyed. “Caroline, what the fuck—Fuck?—”
I grabbed his cock and positioned it under me, going down and taking all of him at once. We both groaned like wild animals. Then I rode him hard enough that he couldn’t get another word out.
I knew what he was going to say. And I couldn’t bear to hear it.
I still didn’t deserve that four-letter word.
Not yet.
“Care,” Knox moaned, forced to match my rough pace. “This isn’t what I’d classify as lovemaking. I have a dictionary?—”
“Fuck your dictionary.”
He gritted his teeth. “Caroline!”
Then, with one great heave, he flipped us both over. I bounced on the bed and gasped, “Oof!” like some undignified bimbo, blinking up at him.
Knox’s chest heaved. Sweat beaded on his forehead. His eyes were vivid blue even in the low lighting. He looked rugged and handsome and like someone I didn’t deserve.
I braced myself to be berated because that was what he looked like he would do, but then he sighed. “Caroline. Why won’t you let me say it?”
“Because.”
“I told you not to play the pity card, woman.”
I bit my lower lip. “I know. It’s going to take time to…”
“Heal?” Knox kissed it free, then brushed the tip of his nose to mine. “Me, too. We’ll just have to do it together.”
“Oh, no, what a horrible thing,” I deadpanned, barely hiding a smile.
Knox’s grin softened. “As horrible as my couch?”
“Mm. Debatable.”
His eyes searched mine for what felt like forever, like he was trying to memorize my face. My heart swelled so much I could barely stand it.
I looped my arms around his neck and threaded my fingers through his hair. “I’m glad you ruined my poker game, Nathaniel Knox. You’re still a cocky bastard… but you’re my cocky bastard.”
Knox’s wicked grin lit up the whole damn room. “I owe you a rematch for sure, spitfire. I’ll kick your sweet ass, though.”
I laughed and tried to switch our positions again—and failed miserably. “Screw you,” I mumbled, caving into a full smile.
“Uh, I think that’s what we’re in the middle of.” Knox leaned in to kiss me again, and it was like the world made complete sense, no rush, no war, nothing but the bed we barely managed to make. Against my lips, he murmured, “Caroline Bates, I think I’m in love with you.”
The world came to a screeching halt.
I stared at Knox. Every emotion I’d ever buried rose all at once—mostly betrayal. “I told you not?—”
But I stopped. Took a breath.