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“My treat, guys!” Lana announces. Before either Tiffany or I can protest, Lana tells the lady at the counter, “Entry for three people, please.”

At the sound of her voice, evenmorepeople turn around to stare at us. Some even take out their phones.

“Um, guys,” I whisper. “People are staring at us. And taking pictures.”

Chapter Twenty-Seven

LANA GLANCES AWAY FROM THE COUNTER TOlook behind us. She, however, doesn’t seem that disturbed. She even smilessweetlyand makes a victory sign with her fingers. “Oh,” she says. “I think they recognize us fromYou’re My Shining Star.”

“Right.” I want to slap myself on the forehead.Duh.Even though episodes have been airing every Saturday night for three weeks, I’ve never really felt “famous.” Not a lot of people at school watch the show, and nothing major ever really happened besides that one awkward moment in the bathroom after I got tagged on Henry’s Instagram.

But Dad did mention that his friends occasionally ask about me, and Mom stopped talking to me after the first episode aired. I guess I should have known that even though I’m still a nobody to people at school, I’m a someone to viewers of the show.

And now, everyone at this spa—well, at least, all thewomen—is going to see me naked.

I’m still not sure how I feel about even Lana and Tiffany seeing me without any clothes on. It’s not that I feel uncomfortable in my body or wish my body was different. But I’ve never stripped in front of my friends before. I’m not sure how they’ll react. Lana and Tiffany are even skinnier than my friends at school. And if anyone says anything about my weight... well, I’m not sure if I’ll be able to forgive them.

The employee hands us our spa uniforms and locker key bracelets, and I’m feeling super self-conscious as we walk into the women’s locker room. Like I expected, everyone, from really old grandmothers with bent backs to little kids holding hands with their moms, is naked. And almost all the girls around my age are skinny and tiny like Tiffany and Lana.

See, Haneul?I hear Mom’s voice in my head.Those girls are so beautiful! If only you tried a bit harder...

My stomach starts churning, and I almost run right out of the locker room. But Lana and Tiffany look really happy and excited, or at least, they do until Lana sees my expression.

“What’s wrong?” she asks, placing a hand on my shoulder.

I shake my head. I don’t want to ruin everyone’s fun.

I’m better than this, I think over and over again as I follow Tiffany and Lana to our lockers. But when they begin taking off their clothes, my stomach feels like it’s flipping around in circles.

It’s a total hetero misconception that queer girls shouldn’t be in locker rooms with other girls. Sure, I’m attracted togirls, but that doesn’t mean that I’m a pervert. The only thing I think when Lana and Tiffany take off their clothes is,Wow, they’re so pretty.

Unlike me. The thought escapes before I can stop it.No, I tell myself.No, your body is perfect just the way it is. The fact that you grew up hearing your mom say it’s not doesn’t make it true.

Someone coughs. I’m mortified when I realize I have my eyes squeezed shut. I barely stop myself from groaning out loud. It probably looks like I’m embarrassed to see Lana and Tiffany without their clothes on. Or worse, like I’m perverted in some weird way. I slowly, reluctantly open my eyes to see that the two of them, still very naked, are staring at me with concerned expressions.

“Are you okay, Skye?” Lana asks. “And don’t just nod your head. Iknowsomething’s bothering you.”

I blink, and suddenly I’m crying. A rush of embarrassment hits me, but no matter how hard I try to stop, I can’t. What starts as just a little drop or two in the corners of my eyes becomes a huge, uncontrollable flood.

“Oh, Skye!” Lana reaches over to me, but I instinctively back away. I hate crying, especially in front of other people. I’m so mortified that all this is happening. “What’s wrong?”

It’s only then that I realize I’m the only one still wearing clothes in the locker room. If it weren’t for me holding everyone up, we could have gone into the baths by now. It takes all of my energy to stop myself from crying even harder.

“Oh my gosh,” I say, wiping away my tears. “Sorry, I’m keeping you guys waiting. I’ll take off my clothes right away.”

“Well, normally, I love it when girls say that,” Tiffany quips. Lana elbows her in the ribs, and Tiffany continues, “But really, there’s no rush. Is there something wrong? You’re crying. Don’t pretend things are okay when they’re not. It only makes things worse.”

I hesitate, unsure how to even begin to explain what’s going through my head. But since it’s unlikely that Lana and Tiffany are just going to let this one go, I slowly say, “It’s been a long time since I’ve been to a Korean spa.”

“How come?” Lana asks gently.

I take a deep breath. It’s hard to believe I’m actually telling anyone about this. It’s one of the few things that I never dared to mention even to my school counselor, since Dr. Franklin probably wouldn’t get the concept of a Korean spa in the first place. I’d be lucky if he didn’t spend most of the time asking,But why is everyone naked?

“Every time my mom and I went...” I finally say. “Well, she’s not reallyabusive, like she doesn’t hit me or anything, but she’d always comment on how everyone’s skinnier than me, and her comments about my body just added up. Like, I’m okay with my body. Most of the time. But she always made me feel like I’m not good enough. And because of that, I’m always afraid of meeting new people, period, since I’m scared they’ll be jerks like her.”

“Aw, Skye,” says Lana. She gives me a big hug. I would havenever thought someone that small could squeeze so hard. “Well, I mean, that’s another type of abuse, you know? Emotional. It obviously hurt you enough that it still bothers you today.”

“I guess.”