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“When I was threatening her life she offeredto kill Rebecca providing I kill Jeff.”
“I’m not shocked by that.”Whizz shrugged.“What are you going to do?”
“She was carrying mybaby.”
“I think you need to touchon the fact that not only was she carrying your baby, you didn’teven remember putting it inside her.”
“Everything is totallyfucked up.”
“Do you care that youscrewed her?”
Gash glared at him.“What kind offucking question is that?”
“I’m just trying to makesense of it, man.”
“Sense?You want sense?How aboutthis?For the pastseven years I’ve been curious about a fucking woman that Ididn’t think existed.Only it turns out that not only does thatwoman exist, but she’s been someone I’ve been harboring hatred forbecause she didn’t come and help me.When everything I’ve beenthinking is fucking lies.Charlotte needed me.She was pregnantwith my kid, and I fucking failed her.”His voice had risen to thepoint of yelling.He was so angry.This time he was angry athimself, and how stupid he had been.
She had been there, andtried to save you.
She went to hell along withyou, and you’d not even known it.
The first thing he did when hesaw her again was choke her.Fuck, crap, shit.He hated himself.
“I had a kid.”
“Did you remember her?”Whizz asked.
“I remembered bits of the night,holding her, feeling her wrapped around me.It’s what got methrough the worst part of prison.I need to go talk to her.”Gashwasn’t going to run away.All he wanted to do was forget about theshit that she’d been through, focus on his own pain, but thatwasn’t the kind of man he was.Years ago, it’s what he would havedone, but now, he wouldn’t even dream of doing it.
Now was not the time to shirk hisresponsibilities.
“We’re here if you needus,” Whizz said.“I’m going to keep on looking, and you can stayhere until you need it.”
Gash nodded.In moments likethis, he appreciated the club.The Skulls gave him the family thathe never had.They were his brothers, whichwas why he never sought out his ownbrother.He didn’t even know what had happened to Andrew.They hadboth come to the club together, and Andrew had failed to make thegrade when it came to The Skulls’ standard.
Pushing thoughts of hisbrotheroutof his mind, he made his way outside.Gash paused when he saw Sallyon the ground, studying.
Sally looked at him, thentoward Charlotte.“Okay, I’ll look scarce.”
He waited until Sally was gone, andthe door had closed giving them some privacy, or as much privacy asthey could have in the garden.
Charlotte was nibbling her lip, and hemoved toward her.
“That was fast,” shesaid.
“I read the file.I didn’t needto read all of it.”He’d glanced through some of the pages.Gashknew as much as he needed to about the situation.
“Do you still think I know whereRebecca and Jeff are?”Charlotte chuckled.
“Don’t do that.Don’t makejokes.”He knelt down, holding onto her knees.
Tears were once again in Charlotte’s eyes.“You were drunk.I never expected you to remember what happened.You thought I’d put you to bed after passing out.”
“I don’t remember the dayclearly.”
“You were my first,” shesaid.
Gash winced.“You were avirgin.”